


Abnormal

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sburb Session, Anorexia, F/M, Hermaphroditic Trolls, M/M, NOT FINISHING!, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Trolls, city, sorry... :(
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-18
Updated: 2013-07-13
Packaged: 2017-12-12 05:33:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 17
Words: 51,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/807865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave discovers a wounded troll on his way back home, turns out this troll is no ordinary troll, like Dirk and Dave aren't normal either. Only difference is that Dirk and Dave aren't being chased by a mob of their own kind that are eager for Karkat's blood.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just so you know, this is from a roleplay with a few friends of mine starring some guest appearances too.  
> Dave/Rose/Roxy: unforgettableCanine - Ash  
> Dirk/Rose/John/Jade: WaterElimental - Gem  
> Karkat: Sparklybecstarz(tumblr) - Bec  
> Roxy: m-m-m-madokakaname - Aradia

Karkat doesn't know how long he has been at it, but running is beginning to take its toll on his legs. It begins to strain his muscles as he begins to pant heavily, his breath frazzled and his eyes dazed. On the run for hours, yet it would seem like months, or even years. This is something he did expect to happen but, not this soon. He needed to rest. Somewhere; away from the tailgating feral beings who would dare to chase him for a pathetic excuse for a reason.

He winces as a minor sore on his knee becomes a persistent struggle to balance while he is moving, his pace slowing down drastically. Panic begins to rise as he veers into an alleyway, not knowing what else to do. He finds a few trash bags and hides amongst them, desperately covering himself in the city filth. He hisses as his knee gives up, basically stranding him there, helpless in an unknown city around him.

"Mmmeh.." Karkat managed a strangled cry as his muscles give up on him. All he could sense is that someone is approaching him, and that the person was alone, from the singular footsteps that were taken. He shivers as the cold was getting to him slowly, his skin covered in Goosebumps, bruises and other horrible wounds. Tears begin to form in his eye as he lets another strangled cry out.

* * *

Dave pulled the hood of his jumper over his head, ignoring the occasional looks of passers-by as he walked down the street, eyes unseen behind those shades of his. He hardly took them off, even when it was dark like it is now, the lights of the street lamps the only luminance to guide him down the footpath. Home was just a few blocks away, never really did take too long to get anywhere around this city; it was all crammed together. The bad thing about the place being crammed together is that there was usually the odd dark alleyway where buildings were too small to fit into but too big for a kiosk or something. It doesn't bother Dave too much; he's used to passing those dark places often, hardly bothering to look down into the gloomy darkness to check if someone or something was in there.

Turning down the street that he always does, he finds himself in an empty street. It doesn't faze Dave that much and he continued walking, converse sneakers scuffing slightly along the pavement. The red jacket only provided so much insulation from the cool night, making him shiver only slightly.

The silence of the night was eerie, making Dave turn around and look about for any signs of life other than the distant sound of cars driving along bitumen roads and, if he listened real hard, talking and the occasional footstep. He shook it off though and continued, a dark alleyway approaching. When he stepped before it he didn't care to look down it, not really bothering to check if there were any signs of life in there or not and just looking down the street, moving to simply pass the alleyway instead.

Dave paused, a pained noise stopping him and attracting his curiosity enough to make him look down the alleyway, wondering who or what had made that noise. The second gurgling cry made him jump a bit as he stared at what looked like a pile of rubbish bags that were moving slightly. Dave took a cautious step closer, eyeing the bags and approaching them steadily. He stopped himself when he was a few feet away, the small muffled sobbing noises coming from it making him worry for the stranger whoever they are.

"Hey? You 'kay?" He tilted his head slightly, looking at the pile for any kind of response.

"Nngh?" He can't say anything, he is clearly too exhausted to even try. Instead he lefts an arm towards the sound of the unfamiliar voice, hoping that they would see it, almost metaphorically begging him, guessing it is a him from the masculinity of the voice, for help.

Dave couldn't exactly make out the colour of the stranger's skin, even as he held his hand out towards him, the nails seemed to be painted in a bright golden yellow colour - that or they're really yellow, ugh - that stood out in the dark night. Dave couldn't just leave the person alone in the night, carefully reaching his hand out and taking the extended appendage by the wrist, hand on the top of theirs in a manner Dave hopped was comforting.

"You needing help? C'mon, come out of there now..." Dave pulled on their wrist slightly, hoping to encourage the person to leave the safety of their little hidey place among rubbish bags.

He allows himself to be touched by the foreign man, as the voice sounded... Like an ally. Karkat's eyes were drooping down and he could not make the figure out from sheer exhaustion, but manages to tighten the grip with the strangers hand. He Tugs on the arm a little, before tilting his head down, and using his other hand to move a few things from his trash fort away, so his body is not obscured from the strangers view.

Dave didn't seem to notice much different about the person, thinking it was just a trick of the light that their skin seemed colourless. What surprised him was the small cuts and bruises littered all over the small body before him. He twisted his mouth to the side in thought, looking over the person and trying to think of what exactly to do.

"Shit you got beat didn't you?" He stated, scanning over the nicks on the other's body. He didn't seem to be much older than himself actually. That's when he saw the two rounded nubs on his head, golden and... non-human. He froze up, blinking a few times behind his shades, trying to figure out what exactly he was looking at.

He nods in response to the man's concerned voice, but cannot bring himself to do anything else. Slumped, he can feel himself leaving consciousness. It was rude sure, but Karkat was not able to keep awake. He hadn't slept since one day before he fled, almost three days ago. His hand goes limp as he passes out, eyes closed, breathing steadily, skin ice cold from the lack of clothing.

Dave stared at the limp body before him, feeling a bit torn in two between trying to help or just running the fuck away because having horns on your heads wasn't exactly a normal thing in human society. Then again, the thing, it, he, something, was unconscious now so it won't hurt Dave will it? He hopes not as he cautiously leans over, pressing a few fingers to his throat, feeling the familiar beat of a pulse and moving of the throat breathing. He let out a small sigh, looking the creature over, unsure of exactly what to call it - him, try to be polite Dave, jeez - and it was kind of hard to find out his name if he was unconscious. Shit, his arm is limp and he's so cold... Fuck. Dave glanced down both ways of the alleyway, checking for any onlookers before sighing and getting the grip to release on his arm enough for him to take off his jacket, carefully leaning over and pulling the stranger away from the wall, supporting his back himself as he slides the piece of clothing over his shoulders. Fuck, what to do now? Um...........

A strong breeze blows down the alleyway, blowing the short, black, matted hair out of the face of Karkat, his pained, yet peaceful features appearing due to the dim glow of the street lights from the exit of the alleyway.

Dave let out a small almost inaudible sigh, looking around once again, trying to think of what exactly to do. Apparently Dave has no idea and he lets out another small sigh, eyebrows pushed inwards, hidden behind black frames, as he stuck a hand into his jeans pocket, pulling out his iPhone and quickly flicking through his contacts, picking out 'Dirk' and calling it, holding the device to his ear and waiting. He probably won't have to wait long, Dirk being the worrying older brother he usually is.

* * *

 

Checking the clock, Dirk glanced out the window for what may have been the fifth time since the streetlights had flicked on. He knew Dave could take care of himself, but he still couldn't shake the paranoia every night when Dave would walk back to their apartment alone. Sighing, he sat down on the couch, resisting the urge to glance at the clock yet again.

Looking at the clock, against his own advice, Dirk tried to calm himself about Dave's extended absence. He'd taught Dave street smarts, he'll be fine. It wasn't working. Dave had probably gotten distracted by some kind of stray animal…

"What is that kid doing?" He muttered to himself, If Dave was in trouble, or was hurt... No, Dirk forced himself to stop the thoughts; Dave was smart enough to avoid trouble... He hoped.

The ringing of his phone had Dirk jumping off the couch in an instant. "Where have you bee- scratch that. Where _are_ you?" He began to pace as he listened, worry being replaced by mild annoyance.

Dave rolled his eyes, Dirk being Dirk. "Alleyway, Roe Street, found some dude... he's hurt, couldn't just leave him out here, he's unconscious but still alive, get your butt over here before I freeze my ass off." Dave, being the douche he is, doesn't even bother waiting for a reply or saying goodbye, opting for just hanging up instead, leaning against the wall, making sure to be a good distance from the stranger first.

Well, the kid wasn't hurt if he was acting like such a dick. Dirk picked up his keys, locking the door before heading to the apartment building's garage to pick up Dave and the weird guy he'd found. As he hopped in, he had to wonder what had happened to the guy, and why Dave of all people had happened to find him. He turned down Roe Street, looking for the familiar face (if it still counted as familiar, being obscured by shades and all) among the dark shadows.

Dave heard the car driving along the street before he saw it, pushing away from the wall and heading to the mouth of the alleyway. He spotted the car and waved an arm out, keeping to the shadows mostly so as not to be seen by a person looking out of a window of one of the buildings.

He noticed Dave, and parked the car in front of him, jerking a thumb to the back seats. "Dump your mystery guy in and let's go." He drummed his fingers as he watched Dave's movements from the mirror.

A noise of what seemingly is to be, at a guess 'angry protestors' echoes down the street, carrying pitchforks and torches, as if they were going to start a riot within the city. Their battle cries and calling of Karkat's name is easily heard.

Dave paused; listening to the noise curiously, heart beating slightly faster as he heard the noises getting closer. Dave didn't want to be stuck in the middle of this. He quickly jogged back over to the stranger, looking him over curiously before crouching down and slipping an arm cautiously under his knees, the other under his arms and around his back. He paused, getting a grip and trying to make sure he didn't drop the guy as he pushed himself up to standing, regaining his balance for a moment before quickly walking back to dirk. "Open the god damn door Dirk! I kinda got my arms full!"

The mob begins to multiply in size, with different variations of weapons within the crowd. Some carried spears; others carried guns, tridents, bows, swords, and blades of some description. One thing was certain. They had horns on their heads.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have decided at the end of each chapter you get funny bits of OOC comments  
> Enjoy!
> 
> ~*BONUS*~  
> Ash: GFGGDFHMJGFDSAFsrhgnZAFGJFD  
> Gem: *hugs for Dave*  
> Ash: *ANGRY HUGS* >:I  
> Gem: *poor Davey*  
> Ash: *playing music as loud as I can instead of screaming* >:I I play music to show how pissed I am depending on the volume. *decides to dance angrily*  
> Gem: *offers self as aggressive dance partner*  
> Ash: *angrily dancing together*  
> Gem: *angry tango?*  
> Ash: *angry tangoooooooooooo*


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karkat isn't as cute as he is when he's asleep...  
> Also, Dirk has a hidden gooey chocolate centre.  
> Dave plainly doesn't know whether to be worried or laugh his ass off.

Dave turned his head to look down the street, just barely making out the shapes of a couple of beings who seemed to be running right at them. The weapons aren't what makes Dave the most uneasy, it's the golden coloured horns on their heads, the same colour as the being’s Dave's carrying has. "Fuck! Dirk!" He couldn't help his voice getting a bit louder, hurrying to the back door of the car quickly, trying to open it with his feet first.

Dirk reached over to open the door for Dave, flinging himself into the back seat to help pull the unconscious being Dave was carrying into the back seat. "Keep your head down Dave." He said as he crawled back into the front seat to start the engine. He barely checked in the mirror if Dave was buckled in before racing away from the mob, far faster than what he should have been doing in the zone. The car spun, facing the mob, as Dirk stared them down daring them to come closer and hurt his little brother.

"Hey look, them Jackasses are stealing him! Get them!" One of the head honchos in front of the group cried out as he directed the mob began to charge towards the car, their torches flashing a bright flame, and their weapons readied. The street went from silent and almost ghostly to rage and frustration within moments of the tribe running to capture their captive.

Karkat stirred a little in the back of the car, not enough to show any life the boy had previously. There were newly recent blood trickling down the unconscious lad's face from reopened wounds, running over the top of his eye and down his grey tinted coloured skin.

Dave stared at the group, unable to do anything as he held an arm between the unconscious figure beside him and the edge of the seat so he couldn't fall off. "Go go go go GO!" He had forgotten all about seat belts as he used his knees against the seat in front of him to stop himself from moving about too much. He kept his lips pressed tight together after the little bit of word repetition, keeping himself calm as he had been taught to from a young age. He began to wonder if he should just give the mob the stranger, but it was probably them who had caused these inflictions upon him so Dave quickly ditched that idea, glancing at the figure lying down asleep, the wounds reopened from movement and beginning to bleed.

"Dirk! Go!" He called again, unable to make his brother move the car unless he did it himself. Dirk revved the car in warning to the crowd; clearly they weren't going to back down. Dave's voice was panicked, and it made him angry and protective. "Hold on Kid, these shits are gonna be eating dust!" It was a dangerous move, U turning in the narrow space. But it was either that or run over the mob and get injured. He sped off; looking at the mirror at the rapidly shrinking crowd, then turned his attention to the road so they wouldn't have an accidental crash. Of course, he was known for driving somewhat erratically around the neighbourhood so maybe he'd better watch for cops instead.

Karkat's body is tossed around the back seat of the car slightly as Dirk's semi-reckless driving allows them to escape. The mob behind changing their tactics from screaming and running to 'lets throw everything and the person who hits the car is our god for the rest of their days'. Even in semi-unconsciousness, Karkat could squint his eyes open a little to see a dark figure, having some form of hold on him. Usually, if the circumstances were different, Mr Karkat fucking Vantas would have something to say about this, but of course this was not in his favour, after all, this was clearly his fucking fault in the first place.

His semi-unconscious body moves a little as strained groans ease from his mouth. ".....fu...ck" He breathed as he dared to open his eyes slightly wider, to make sure his saviour was not a fucking retarded, brainless, primitive shit-monkey like the gorillas who were chasing him. Gog, that was awful to even begin thinking about and boy did it make his head hurt to even try and begin contemplating it.

Dave looked at the stranger's eyes curiously, trying not to freak out too much when he saw bright yellow sclera instead of white. The grey irises weren't too unhumanly but the small specks of red just beginning to fill in his eyes were a bit unerving, even if Dave did know of a couple of people, himself included, with some freaky coloured eyes. Being free of the crowd made him feel a lot better, just curious now, thinking about whether to be frightened of this creature or not. He started off with the latter

"Hey Dirk, sleeping beauty's awake and not enjoying your amusement ride, neither am I as-a-matter-of-fact. It's easier to ride a bucking bull than to try and not be thrown around in your car while you’re driving, unrestrained." He tried to keep an eye on the curious person the whole time in case he might try to attack Dave or Dirk spontaneously.

"Maybe you should put your seatbelt on rather than snark at the guy who just saved 'sleeping beauty' from an angry mob." Even so, he slowed down all the same, He didn't want to seriously hurt Dave with an accident. He glanced in the rear-view mirror, glaring at the thing Dave had picked up in case it attacked. Fuck saving the lives of strangers. If it hurt Dave, it was dead quicker than that mob had changed to throwing shit at the car. For now though, it seemed pretty docile.

Karkat shifts himself onto an arm to add some stability to himself before moving as he is in a very awkward position, his body uncomfortably placed in the back seat of the car. Karkat, noticing the pale looking creatures looking at him were remotely like the trolls of his tribe, or ex-tribe now, he then proceeds to shiver a little.

"Holy fuck, who the mother of Gog are you supposed to be?" He croaked out almost in one go, without his breath faltering severely. He looks at the... thing who is sitting in the back seat next to him and snarls. "And I have just, heaven for-fucking-bid, entered a fucking circus abduction agency. Some day I'm having…"

Well, the thing had a mouth on himself.

Dave blinked a few times, staring at the figure now leaning away from him, thinking the words said over in his mind curiously before snorting in amusement, snickering just beneath his breath and making his shoulders shake slightly.

"Haha! Nah! We don't just abduct random people off of the street for no reason. We aint creepers than you very much. Can I just ask who you are, let alone what you are? I don't think normal people are supposed to have the whole horns, grey skin, yellow eyes, yellow nails shtick going on, if you know what I mean. Oi Dirky! Turn up the heater or whateveryoucallit. It's cold!" He rubbed his hands on his upper arms as if to prove his point to Dirk, even though he couldn't see his upper body, not even in the rear view mirror.

"Excuse you but that mob looked fit to kill, and you know the heater is a piece of shit Dave" Finally, he swung into the garage at their apartment, turning around to look at them.

"Ok, listen here. This is where we live, and you better appreciate us doing this for you. We're wasting our time caring for you so no funny business or my sword is separating your head from that neck of yours." He pulled the keys out, before kicking the door open to get out. He looked back at them, leaning on the car and waiting for Dave and the mysterious thing to get out.

Dave let out a sigh, but he couldn't blame dirk for being protective; Dave was Dirk's only living brother, Rose and Roxy their only other family members, cousins, and they’re who-the-fuck-knows-where They’ve told him where they live, but with his memory they could be living on Mars. He nodded anyways, opening up the door closest to him and shutting it behind himself, thinking that the stranger should know how to open a car door at the very least. He shuffled a few paces away before glancing back, waiting.

"..." The troll stayed silent as he figured out his options. A: Running. No he was not physically able to do this at all, even if he fucking tried his hardest, he might get a few meters. B: Staying with the ugly fuck tards. This means he will need to put up with their fucking black rimmed glasses, their cool kid facade like attitude and most of all, let them fucking run him down to hell and back with questions.

Well. Staying with them cannot be so bad... Right? The troll thought about part B a lot in such a short amount of time that he didn't even notice the human who was previously next to him, was waiting on him to leave the safety of the transportation contraption of some sort. It was interesting to actually be in this contraption, he would never see this out in where he lives- Lived.

"Son of a bitch." He muttered to himself as his knee begins to burn a little from the pain. He thought the injury was minor, but in all seriousness, it was swollen with a wound where an arrow, dipped in the blood of his kind, dug into. Holy gog it hurt like a motherfucker, but he didn't care about that. He was alive right? And thankful for being alive.

Dave just sort of stands behind Dirk, looking over his shoulder at the creature, feeling a bit of pity for him upon seeing the wounds on him bleeding. "I think we should get him to the appartment quickly..." He told Dirk, even though he's pretty sure his brother knows what they have to do. "Bandages now, questions and such later, and holy shit do I have a lot of questions so you best get your answers ready. Goin' in the elevator because I don't think our guest can walk too far with those cuts he's sporting literally all over." Walks over and pushes the up button on the elevator, waiting for it to come down and watching Dirk by the car cautiously and slightly nervously.

"Dude, I don't think he knows how to get out." It was kinda pitiful, watching the thing crawl about in the car. He took pity on it and opened the door, bracing himself in case it tumbled out. "You alright? Need somethin'?" He purposely stood between the thing and Dave, there was no way his brother was going to be in danger because of this thing.

Karkat dived out of the car and scuffled along the cold, hard ground, almost second guessing himself. It is now when he eye's the mysterious figures, being able to properly see them and it stunned him, his mouth gaping open like a bass pilled on a wooden plate on your wall.

"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....." Dave stood there, just sort of watching this happen.

Dirk picked up their surprise guest, cradling him in his arms like anyone would to a child. He stepped into the elevator, leaning against the wall with the creature in tow. It felt good to be holding someone again, ever since Dave had grown out of the 'cuddle' phase he'd been sort of... lonely. Of course, he didn't know if Dave knew how affectionate he really was, he tended to keep it in behind the 'cool kid' façade.

Karkat began to snarl as the human with the ridiculous shades picked him up, his body shivering from the cold in the meantime. He struggles at first, but begins to calm down once they reach the elevator. He can feel the blood trickle down out of the wound on his knee, but ends up only making himself as comfortable as he can in the current situation he is in, thought he hates it with every fibre in his being.

Dave was seriously trying to hold himself back, but he can't stop from smirking at how Dirk was holding a total stranger, something not human as well, in his arms like a baby. Shit be nostalgic yo. He couldn't stop himself snickering though, even as he pushed the buttons to go up to the floor their apartment was on. Dirk heard Dave snicker, and figured it had something to do with the non-human in his arms. Meanwhile, Dave looked at the stranger curiously, noting his ragged clothing, the wounds, bruises, scratches and cuts littering his body. He was a mess. Dave also looked at the horns curiously for a few moments while the elevator rose up before giving one of them a poke.

"What's with the head gear?" He asked, face returning to its usual blank expression, untelling of his emotions.

"Fuck off." Karkat replied, as the words eased out through his teeth. He had no intention to verbally spill out every little thing to such strange creatures, who have just decided to help him. Sure, it was the least bit gen-

'No, fuck it' He thought as he looked away from the both of them, to observe the new room he was in.

He absently listened to them as the elevator moved, "Hey Dave, what if someone else jumps on while I'm holding monotone here?" He raised an eyebrow in question towards his brother, awaiting the answer.

"Say its cosplay. Deny it all. Deny, deny, deny. That's the only way you get through life alive." He snorted in amusement at his own words before going silent again, waiting and watching the numbers change as it went up floors, hoping no one else got on. It would be a bit awkward saying that a beat up person was doing cosplay, sort of a bad image for both Dirk and Dave really. Fuck, hopefully luck is on their sides tonight...

"FUCK YOU FOR SAYING I AM DENYING ANYTHING, HOW CAN YOU EVEN BELIEVE, CONSIDERING I HAVE NOT EVEN FUCKING KNOWN YOU FOR NOT EVEN ONE FUCKING TIME PERIOD AT THIS POINT, THAT I WILL JUST ANSWER ANYTHING YOU ASSFUCKS THROW AT ME?" He growled as he began to struggle in the possibly the older man's grip.

Dirk found himself rocking back and forth to the movement of the elevator. He didn't know why, and it would probably just cause Dave to laugh at him again. He turned his attention to the creature in his arms, wondering why it was suddenly struggling. "Hey, whoa there, we're just gonna fix you up ok?"

Dave was just watching this happening, not making a move to interact to stop them or help them. "Are you half worm? Because you look like it with the way you're wriggling all over the place like you're trying to burrow into the ground to hide from the mighty bird trying to eat you." He kept a very faint smirk on his lips, leaning back against the wall of the elevator to watch the show.

Dirk sighed, that probably wouldn't help at all. "Dave, that attitude isn't needed" he kept rocking the loudmouthed thing, holding it close in an attempt to calm it down with body heat. He hummed into the hair softly; an old lullaby he used to sing for Dave.

"What the holy mother of fuck are you doing?" Karkat gazed into the man who is carrying him currently's eyes, well black triangular eyes, almost evilly. "I am not a fucking baby; I do not need to be hummed at to fucking calm myself down nookfucker."

Dave blinked curiously. "Nookfucker...?" He paused, repeating the word in his head a few times before chuckling. "I've never heard that one before. Hey, what's a nook? Ever heard that one, bro?" He tried to ignore the feeling of nostalgia as he heard the song, recognizing it faintly from some forgotten part of his brain.

"Can't say I have. Must be a term this thing uses". He was annoyed he didn't get to finish his humming, though it obviously wasn't appreciated. He looked up as the lights flashed for their floor. "Time to go Dave. You go ahead and get the shit we'll need alright?" He calmly stepped out of the elevator and strode purposefully towards their apartment.

Karkat snarled at his own misplacement of his verbal abuses, face palming himself. "Gog fucking strife." He shakes his head in his hand as he can feel himself moving in the man's arms.

Dave passes the two, listening to the creature's words as he passes, turning around to walk backwards a few paces and stare at him, arms crossed over his chest. "Gog? You mean God? The white beared guy who apparently lives in the clouds?" He didn't even wait for a reply, turning around and moving ahead, keys being pulled out of his jean's pocket and unlocking the apartment door, holding it open for the two to follow in after him.

"STOP FUCKING JUDGING WHATEVER I AMSAYING TO YOU BEFORE I DO SOMETHING SO FUCKING DRAMATIC THAT WILL RESULT IN A SLIT THROAT, YOUR BLOOD ALL OVER THE FLOOR AND IN MY FUCKING HANDS!!" Karkat roared violently, before elbowing the man who was holding him several times in any where he could reach. "I DO NOT EVEN _KNOW_ WHO YOU CUNTFAGGOTS ARE IN THE FIRST FUCKING PLACE!" He struggles once more, hurting his knee enough for him to unintentionally start to cry, his red liquid tears appearing in his eyes. "FUCKING... just stop with all the stupidly induced questions alright?!"

Dirk ignored the outburst, carefully slipping inside the apartment then the bathroom, placing the thing in the tub and turning the water on. "Shh, let's just get you clean, warm and fed ok?" He adjusted the temperature of the water; he didn't know how sensitive the creature's skin was after all. "Is this temperature good for you?" He swirled the water a little, testing the temperature.

Karkat just nods his head and sticks his hand in the water, nodding again. His wordless expressions, as he looked around the room, lost in the architectural design, almost hurt him. He was not used to seeing this sort of new looking, or modern, structure. Hell, he didn't even know how that water was contained in the strong binding... thingy? What the fuck was that thing anyway?

Dave shut the door and quickly hurried over, pulling his jacket off of the creature before it got wet. "Sorry but I do kinda like this thing, don't wanna get it too dirty." Tosses it to the basket that served for dirty laundry before sliding over to the cabinet and crouching down, opening it up and scouring through it.

Dirk put the plug in, watching the water slowly rise. "Bubbles?" he asked the thing, holding the bottle for its inspection. "Just don't get it in your eyes." His inner nurturing nature was going wild, he hadn't had a good excuse to use it since Dave grew up.

Bubbles! Finally something Karkat recognizes! Hoo-fucking-rray for that. He gestures wordlessly that he wants bubbles but nothing else. On the inside, extremely deep on the inside, he doesn't seem to have a problem with these creatures at all. Sure, they are complete assholes when it comes to their bleeding sarcasm but what about their other quir- 'No, you will stop right there shit stain,' Karkat thought as he snuggled into the warm water of the 'bath'.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "This RP is now officially called FIWTAFU!(FuckItWereTooAwesomeForUrls)".


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no patience, take this chapter!  
> TAKE IT!
> 
> Summary:  
> Karkat thinks head lotion bottles is a bucket OuO  
> Dirk is mainly confused about the whole cultural misunderstanding  
> Dave just wants to have fun!  
> (has '~oh girls just wanna have fun~' stuck in head. I hope you're happy!)

After a minute or so Dave eventually pulled out a medical kit, some bandages placed in a bag beside it and he dumped the supplies on the ground, kicking them with his foot over to Dirk before standing up again. "Look, just gonna say it now; just don't take me seriously all the time, I hardly am ever serious really."

Dirk turned to pick up the supplies, eyes rolling. "Don't kick them Dave." he knew Dave would continue to do so, even after being scolded about it so many times. He placed them near the slowly filling bathtub, away from where the creature could get his hands on them. "Hey Dave, how about making this thing something to eat?" He turned to the grey skinned creature in question "anything in particular you want?"

He looked at the thing who asked him about food and sighed, he hadn't eaten anything at this point, so his stomach was probably the size of a fucking wrigglers head, and the fact that he wasn't hungry was all the more reason for him not to reply.

"I'm making the food so he can eat what he gets." Dave states, walking out of the bathroom before either of the two could stop him, heading to the kitchen area and scanning through the fridge for something edible to eat. Sandwiches it is then. He dragged the bread out, dumping it on the bench and opening up the cupboard, looking inside curiously before just pulling out the honey; it’s the easiest to use and tastes sweet as all hell.

Dave eventually returned, after tossing the supplies that weren’t needed back to where they belong, carrying three sandwiches, handing two to dirk before sitting himself on the toilet, not entirely too sure on what to do with this new being in their house. After eating a few bites he swallowed his food before speaking.

"So, what's your name? And what are you? I just want to know those two things for now, the rest of the questions can wait I think." He flicked a few crumbs off of his pants and onto the floor carelessly, head lifting back to stare at the creature in their bathtub.

Karkat looks up at the shorter appearing creature and sighs, He wasn't really in the mood to be answering questions but, considering the fact that they have helped him, unwantedly, thus far, he thought about the backlash of providing this information before just giving up about the thought almost within seconds.

"Karkat." He replied, his head sinking into the bath of water a little. His voice was a little hoarse, from yelling, but that didn't differ his voice from not being clearly heard. He then looked at the other man for a moment. "Vantas."

Dave smirked slightly. "Car cat? Like beep beep meow?" He was only half serious; it sounded like he said 'car cat', and that didn't exactly sound like a name. He was also half suspicious this was a fake name, made up, a lie. "Heh, that's a pretty odd name if you ask me, which you're not asking me, but I'm providing my input as a free sample, don't take too many or the manager is gonna get pissy that you're only tasting and not buying." He continued to have that smug expression on his face, eating another bite of his food.

"You things are you dull, boring and have immensely annoying humour..." Karkat snarled a little as he let his head dive down in the water, submerged into it.

Dirk rolled his eyes and dunked 'Karkat' under the water. "Behave." he said, letting him back up. He then cupped some water and tossed it idly at Dave. "You too, play nice.” His instincts wanted him to protect Karkat, his logical side said that the guy wouldn't appreciate nor accept it. And it wasn't like he could coddle Dave, though he managed to sneak some actions past him occasionally.

Dave scowled at Dirk, looking at the patch of water he had left on his clothes with irritancy. "Fuck you, bro." He hissed before simply pulling his pants off and tossing them at Dirk, leaving the room to go find a new, clean, dry pair of pants to wear instead, leaving Dirk to care for Karkat for a while.

"... What do you call yourselves?" Karkat questioned, as he looked up to the thing who remained by his side. Even though his knee was stinging like the fucking nines currently, it was... A nice feeling of getting tons of dirt, mud, leaves and whatever other filthy muck he had on him off his body, the grey skin lightening a little, to his pleasure.

He hummed a little. "I'm called Dirk," He picked up a bottle of shampoo. "You know how to use this?" he asked, holding it out towards Karkat. He glanced at where Dave had left, he honestly hated making Dave annoyed with him, there was too much distance between them already. So immersed in his thoughts, he forgot to listen for the response to the question he'd asked.

He claws at the bottle of shampoo and curls himself up in a ball, his knees tucked up. "Why would you, in Gog almighty, want me to use that!" To him, it resembled too much of a tribal bucket, for them to use as a reproduction method. "I haven't even known you for one fucking time period and here you are wanting to host my young! What kind of suck fuck are you!?"

The motion of the bottle being knocked into the water startled him out of his daydream. He frowned at the creature, picking up the now wet bottle. "What are you talking about? You put this shit in your hair to clean it." To demonstrate, he poured a little into his hand and let it slide into the water before washing the rest off of his hand. "See, perfectly harmless, unless you get it in your eyes."

"NONONONONONO DID YOU JUST NO FUCK NO OH GOG NO!" The troll cried out as he watched the fluid fall into the water. "THAT IS NOT FUCKING FUNNY! THIS IS THE WORST FUCKING PROPOSAL I HAVE EVER HAD!" Clearly, he was only mildly annoyed at what the other individual was currently doing, presenting himself to Karkat like that, at least get to know him first. Gog.

Dave, even though he was in his room already, could hear Karkat's shouting. He raised an eyebrow, leaning slightly on the door frame with his head sideways to listen before shrugging it off and heading in, just grabbing some jeans out from his drawers and pulling them on to his legs. He didn't go out immediately, opting for just turning on one of the fans in his room to clear out some old musky smell coming from somewhere. He glanced to his bed curiously before thinking, wondering where Karkat would sleep. 'Couch' he thought, giving a little sigh and leaving his room to one of the cupboards around the house, dragging a blanket down and simply chucking it at the couch. Their guest can just deal with that for tonight till he leaves or until Dirk and Dave can figure out a better, long-term option, if it was necessary; Dave wasn't sure how long he would let this new being stay here. Just until he heals? Just until they get tired of him? Till he leaves of his own accord? He returns to his room, grabbing one of his pillows and tossing it at the couch before returning to his 'lair' as dirk often called it, considering he spent nearly all of his time in there when he's not out of the house.

Clearly, the creature had no idea what shampoo was. Sighing and feeling like he was caring for a small child, he poured some more into his hand. "Close your eyes." was all the warning he gave the thing before rubbing the stuff into its hair. He was glad he didn't mind getting splashed, he predicted a LOT of thrashing.

"WHY ARE YOU PUTTING YOUR FUKING GENITAL DISCHARGE INTO MY HAIR YOU SICK FUCK!" Karkat cried out as he began thrashing about in the bath tub. His face began to tint red as his anger and rage began to blow up within him immensely, his body shivering from the rage coincidentally.

He paused, frowning. "What the actual fuck dude? That is NOT what this is. Also, why would we use that shit in our hair?" He went back to scrubbing, sort of wishing Dave was there to hold the thrashing grey ball of rage still so he didn't risk minor harm through scratches.

Dave heard the thrashing and moved quickly to the bathroom, slowing as he arrives so Dirk doesn't see he was in a bit of a hurry to make sure he was alright. He blinked at the sight before him, tilting his head a bit and leaning against the door frame, arms crossed over his chest and a foot on the wood behind him. "I think this is better than funniest home videos." He states, not making a move to help either of them for whatever situation they have themselves in. Karkat was going to get sore eyes one way or another.

Karkat looked at the male individual, confused. "It...’s not?" He questions before seeing the other one enter the room, and ignoring his horrendously not cool comment. The mutant troll's body began to calm the fuck down as his thrashing stopped and his rage died down. "Don't fucking touch my horns you asshole." He added, the words grinding though his sharp, pointed teeth.

He nodded a little; cleaning the hair was easier now that the creature wasn't thrashing around. "If you're not here to help then fuck off Dave." He didn't turn around, Dave could deal with not having all his attention for once, this thing actually needed his help and obviously had no idea how to do simple tasks. "I need to wash it out now, close your eyes." he warned as he filled a jug full of water to dump over its head.

"Don't mind me asking this but; does your species bathe clothed? Because there's gonna be at least some dirt and grime underneath all of that clothing that the water's not gonna be able to remove." Dave smirked a bit, not making a move to leave, wondering how awkwardly amusing he can possibly make this situation.

"Before I answer any fucking questions, what species are you?" Karkat pressed the question, just before Dirk spilt a handful of water onto his head, which was somewhat relaxing in a strange sort of way.

"Dave, do me a favour and shut the fuck up before I kick your ass" He ran his fingers through Karkat's hair to get all the shampoo out, being mindful of the horns. "We're humans. Do you want us to leave so you can undress and clean yourself properly? You'll have to borrow Dave's clothes though." He didn't care if Dave complained, his clothes would fit better than Dirk's.

"Hey!" Dave butted up, not really amused with Dirk instantly offering his own clothes without asking him. He let out a sigh of annoyance, but shook his head to return his face to an non-agitated state. "And what exactly are _you_?" Dave asked, still a bit curious as to what this creature was. "And why were those others chasing after you like that? Trying to kill you I suppose? Why?"

"H-HUMANS!" He gasped, standing up in the bath, and slipping over, to land back into it again, not making any new injuries on himself, but succeeding in splashing water everywhere all over him and Dirk and... The Dave human... If that is what he is called, Karkat would not know for the world. "WHERE ARE YOUR FUCKING BIG, DEVIOUSLY, EVIL AND SNARLISTIC EYES? YOUR LARGE TEETH AND WHY ARE YOU SO FUCKING SHORT, ARE YOU THE BABIES OF YOUR KIND?" His tribe was taught not to mingle with humans, as they would kill their kind on the spot, efficiently and no troll who has ever met one never lived. Or maybe he was told this and it was a prank, he didn't know.

"And wait… You speak Trollian?" He quirked an eyebrow at the humans, confused as he calmed down once again.

Dirk was dumbfounded. "Dave, your turn to deal with him."

Dirk got up and pushed past his little bro to go see what he had made. Taking care of a creature with the mentality of a kid towards human culture got tiring.

Dave quirked an eyebrow at Karkat's words before getting an idea, shrugging and nodding his head a bit. "Oh, those things, well we got a spell that puts an illusion on those people we don't want to see how big and fierce we are. We eat little trolls like you like snacks, probably ten a day, but I really don't like how I find bones stuck between my teeth."

He smirks slightly watching Dirk disappear before shifting over to Karkat who was still in the bath, sitting on the floor nearby. "And my fierce, devilish eyes are hidden behind these babies." He taps his shades. "So you best just be on your best behaviour unless you want to see what we're really like on the inside."

Karkat looks at the Dave human and snarls is disgust, before pulling out his trusty weapon of choice, his sickle, from seemingly out of nowhere, shining it in plain view. "Is that a challenge human?" He was scared stiff at the humans words, his grip on his weapon a little faulty, something that would have been picked on in the past. Yeah, don't think about that at all.

Dave smirked, uncaptchaloguing his own sword, flicking it in the air and catching it in his hand again, just showing off to Karkat, not really planning on hurting him. "Not if you don't want it to be..." He shrugged noncommittally. He wondered what Dirk will think about this...

He felt a bit of regret leaving that thing to deal with Dave, but hey, he couldn't be the sole carer. Dave found him, by rights _he_ should be making Dave do all the work. Pity he wasn't that mean of a brother. He heard a thump on the door, and opened it to the naggy old lady that lived in the apartment below them. She seemed convinced that he and Dave were secretly murderers or that he was abusive. Batty old lady didn't know shit. "Sorry about the noise, Dave has a loud friend over."

"Ha, I suppose that they are right, about you humans. Blood thirsty for our precious, resourceful blood. Well, aren't we pathetic humans?" His comment was a little louder than it should have been as he stood up in the bath, his clothes dripping wet, and his eyes flashing with a slightly more visible red tint.

Dave heard the voice of the old lady and smirked, turning his head to the door and choosing to ignore Karkat for now. "Yeah, but I don't think he's gonna struggle for much longer! Dirk, you're gonna have to clean up this bathroom when I'm done; it's gonna get pretty BLOODY messy, more than it already is." He enjoyed messing with the lady.

Karkat threatened to slice Dave with slicing the air mere centimetres from his chest. "Yes, _DIRK_ , It is going to get _EXTREMELY BLOODY_ in here." A small, sadistic like smirk appears in the corners of his face when he finished his piece.

He frowned at the loud shouts of their guest, before turning back to the shocked woman's face. "Look Mrs Slint, this is shit that has nothing to do with you. Just go back to your apartment." He was definitely going to kick Dave's ass. "Dave is being an annoying little shit as usual." She didn't look convinced. One thing you hadn't told Dave was that she had threatened to call the CPS on him more than once. This time she might actually do it. He shut the door in her face; he didn't care about being rude right now.

Dave moved back from Karkat, the swing of his weapon a bit too close for comfort. "Whoa there, best not to hurt someone with that letter opener you got there." He tapped his sword at Karkat's weapon, pushing it just slightly away from himself, face blank and trying to figure out if he's maybe gone a bit too far. He let out a small bothered sigh. "Do you even remember what I said about taking me seriously?" He deadpanned, blade pointed down but still held in his hand in case the troll decided to surprise attack him.

He walked back into the bathroom. To the troll he may look calm, but Dave would realise he was angry.

"Playtimes over you two." He yanked Dave out of the room and turned him towards himself. "Just, keep yourself out of trouble for once Dave."

Karkat watched the two of them leave before getting out of the bathtub and closing the door, before sitting on the floor. It did not bother him if his clothes were wet, making him cold, wetting the hardened, evenly cracked floor. He could not give a fucking shit at all.

Dave paused, mouth twisted to the side thoughtfully as he let out his breath through his nose; he could tell Dirk was being serious, not messing around. He simply nodded, stepping back against the wall to keep out of his brother's way, trying to think of how to fix things up.

Dirk walked towards the bathroom, easing the door open and walking to Karkat, steps soft and slow. "Are you alright? We need to take care of those injuries." He picked up the items from the medicine kit, turning towards the troll. "I'm not going to hurt you.” as proof He reached up and put his shades on top of his head, so his orange eyes could be seen by the troll. He carefully moved closer, only moving as close as Karkat would let him.

He looks at the humans eyes and almost gasp. "You have got to be kidding me." Even humans had higher blood colours than he did. WHAT THE FUCK? Well... This one was nicer, the other human is a complete cunt. Dirk idly wondered what the freak out over his eyes was. It wasn't like the guy didn't have weird eyes himself. "Sit on the edge of the bath, and I'll deal with that knee first." He bent down to put the items on the floor, picking back up only what he would need.

Meanwhile, Dave rubbed at one of his eyes in the hall way, glasses pushed up to his forehead and resting on the top of his head as he did so. He stopped and slid the shades back down as the door opened, staring at Karkat standing there. "Hmm? You need anything princess?" He joked, waiting against the wall and dropping his hand to his sides, trying to seem relaxed and only partially succeeding.

"No YOU WILL NOT TOUCH MY WOUND!" He snarled in reply, backing away from the Dirk human. Will Dirk cull him because of his blood colour? Possibly, after all he is a full-fledged orange blooded... human. Does this work with humans too? Too many questions began to buzz around in his head, causing him to groan unintentionally.

Dave continued to lean against the wall, unsure of exactly what to do. "Seriously, he's just trying to help, so just let him help you, Jesus." He rolled his head with his eyes before returning to staring at Karkat, waiting for his movement.

Dirk instead left the items next to Karkat, stepping back. "Well if I can't touch it, then take care of it yourself." Even though he said that, he still stayed in the room to move in when Karkat couldn't handle it anymore.

He looks at the Dirk human before grasping onto one of his arms, digging a claw into his arm. He was curious to see if orange blood did exist in the human hemospectrum of blood colours.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> turntechGodhead [] joined chat.  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "NOTES: 1 | Trolls are gonna track Karkat's scent. 2 | We needs some funny ass shenanigans to happen! 3 | I gots no more ideas so far :I 4 | *flips Bec's couch* FUCK YO COUCH! ~ Ash".  
> turntechGodhead [] disconnected.
> 
>  
> 
> LOOOOOOOOOOK! :D http://maniccrocodilian.tumblr.com/image/50989594141


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Karkat: 'I hate these two but... why are they being nice to me?(exceptforroundshadesguyhesbeinGadick)  
> Dirk: 'poor little alien dude poor guy don't know what to do fuck stop worrying about me Dave!'  
> Dave: 'I am stuck with a creepy/wierd troll and my bro isn't helping the situation...'

Dirk let out a shocked noise as the creature dug claws into his arm, causing blood to gush through the wound. He tried to yank his arm away from the claws, before realising that that would hurt his arm even worse. "What are you doing?"

Dave quickly stepped forward, whacking his hands sharply at the troll's after seeing he was harming Dirk, trying to shock him enough to loosen his grip. His other hand shoving the troll back by the shoulders as he stepped between the two defensively. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?!" He hissed out, eyes angry as they glared through his shades.

Karkat stared at the red blood that covered his claw, pulling his hand back like he had been burnt. "Red... blood?" Well, certainly that was unexpected, almost like a plot twist if you will. The troll then looked at Dave. "Do you have red blood too?"

Dave narrowed his eyes slightly, still a bit pissed and protective. "Of fucking course we have red blood! All humans have red blood, idiot! Sheesh, even you have red blood! What's so wrong with us having red blood?! Blood is fucking blood! It's all the same! It's the same thing that keeps everyone alive!" He held his hands at his sides, leaning dangerously forward to Karkat.

He looked at Dave is disbelief... "You knew... My blood colour?" He was so fucking confused, ashamed and just _fuck_ every negative emotion that ever existed.

Dirk pulled Dave back a little. "Relax bro." He started humming the old lullaby into Dave's ear, trying to get him to calm down. "Shhh, li’l man..."

Dave looked at Dirk in disbelief, not really wanting to back down but the memories and nostalgia was enough for his shoulders to slump and for Dave to lean back a bit. "You were bleeding all over the place, if you hadn't noticed, of course we knew your blood colour..." He paused, thinking it over. "Your species doesn’t have red blood?" He was literally confused now...

He looks away disgusted. "Well since you fucking know now I might as well educate you on a few things. One, I am a troll. Two, I have red blood. Three, having red blood is a sin in our society, as it is called a 'Mutant Deformation'. Four, we have burgundy, bronze, ochre, lime, olive, jade, teal, cerulean, indigo, purple, violet and fuchsia coloured blood, with a system in place for hierarchy within our council. Mutant blood being the lowest and Fuchsia being the highest, which are referred to as 'Highbloods' You know the order of colour I just told you? That is the order of the hierarchy."

"Mutants are usually culled because of this deformation, it is almost like killing a human for having a disability they never intended to have. It is shitty. Anyway, well, someone figured out that I have this deformation and now, I am on the run." He finished explaining, not really wanted to say anything else on the matter.

Dirk didn't even think, he reached out to pull Karkat forward into a hug. Now he had Dave and Karkat pulled into his chest. "You're safe here" He had no idea which one he was talking to, just that it was directed between them.

"What are you doing to me Dirk human?" He questioned, as he was immensely confused about the gesture the human was currently performing.

Dave just sort of stood there, letting out a groan of annoyance. "That is Dirk with his nurturing instincts settings on high, fuck..." He muttered, but he secretly enjoyed the embrace, barely letting his arms hold the two in return. "Just wait till it gets to max, he'll try to spoon feed you." He teased.

"Shut up Dave, or I'll tie your arms together so you can only eat _by_ being spoon fed." He still didn't let either of them go, because as Dave said, his instincts wanted him to hold them close and protect them.

"Bondage? Kinky." Dave snorted.

"Of course you'd say that." Dirk was secretly pleased at the contact. It had been a long time since he'd hugged _anyone_ like this, and it was nice. Dave being a part of it was just a bonus.

Karkat hesitated for a few moments before lifting his arms up and embracing him as well, very awkwardly. "I have never done this in my life..."

Dave then stared at Karkat in horror. "You've never hugged anyone before?!" Dave sounds appalled by this new and shocking revelation.

Karkat shakes his head in response "If you are referring to the embracing of another, live, individual as hugging, then no, I have not done this 'Hugging' before." He became a little easy going when he discovered the other's blood colours.

Dave let out a sigh, giving Karkat a small squeeze. "You poor under privileged troll, you..."

"Want those wounds looked at now?" Dirk pulled away from them to look at Karkat's body, taking note of all the injuries. Of course, he couldn't resist being teasing. "I'll kiss them better once they're all clean and dressed." His tone was clearly teasing, but he knew the troll would probably explode. Dave snickered, glad that Dirk was no longer pissed at him for messing with things for his own entertainment.

"Kiss them and I will slit your throat human." Karkat replied, a little hissy however a lot calmer than before, which was obviously a good start to things.

Dirk couldn't help it, he laughed. "I was just teasing little Troll." He picked up the supplies and offered them. "You going to do it, or do you trust me enough to?"

"... Fine, check them." Karkat knew jack shit about first aid, ironic considering that his tribe title is the Knight of Blood.

"Did you two eat the sandwiches I gave you both or are they still on the bathroom floor?" He leaned to the side and looked into the bathroom curiously, checking.

Oh. He hadn't noticed. Dave wouldn't be happy he was skipping out of eating... again. (it took some persistence to keep a teenage boy fed) He picked up the supplies to ignore the guilty feeling he got whenever he skipped eating for Dave's benefit. Instead, he carefully wiped at the wounds, cleaning them.

"... Fuck, do you need me to remove my pants?" The Mutant questioned, before he began to shiver a little because he was cold.

Dave raised an eyebrow. "A bit eager there are we, Kitkat? That is your new name, I dub thee Kitkat the grumpy, nubby horned troll." He smirked, tilting his head to the side as if to admire his amazing, wonderful work of a nickname he had come up with.

Karkat choose to ignore Dave, knowing fully well this is more of the 'don’t trust me I am not always serious' thing. Except the horns, that comment was uncalled for. "LEAVE MY HORNS ALONE!"

He rolled his eyes, ignoring the two of them bantering. "Just roll them to above the knee, I'll clean and wrap it and then you can point out any other injury alright?" He backed off so Karkat could roll up the legs and he could get back to work.

"Alright." Karkat then rolls his pants up past his knee with little difficulty "It is a flesh wound-" Karkat coughs a little before continuing "I was shot with an arrow several days ago. I reopened it recently."

Dave realised Karkat was being really defensive about his horns and, being a curious teenager, he smoothed two fingers over one of them, his other hand staying at his sides. "What are these even for? They're too small for you to even use against someone..."

"Nnmm...." He replied when Dave was touching his horns, but for some reason, he didn't have it in him to yell at the ass-fuck who was called Dave.

"Dave." Dirk’s voice was firm, a tone he rarely had to take towards Dave. He yanked the teen's hand away, lips set in a stern line.

Dave put on a pouty frown. "What? No humans have head nipples like that..." He tried to reason, glancing back at Karkat's horns curiously.

"I do not want to answer that..." Karkat tried his hardest not to blush, and proved to be successful in doing so. Dave raised an eyebrow but said nothing in response, his hands remaining at his sides instead.

Dirk rolled his eyes "They're probably some way of attracting a mate, like if he touched your junk. That's probably what it's like for him." The troll looked at Dirk, nodding. He could not trust his own words as of the current moment.

Dave pulled back a bit, blinking in surprise. "So basically, I probs just touched some alien guy's dick?" He made a 'what the fuuuuuuuuuuck?' kind of face at the two.

"Not exactly. But I don't want to go into detail right now" Karkat's voice was very low, as he was embarrassed in saying anything about the topic. "Can we change topic, for the love of Gog?"

"'gog'......." Dave rolled the word on his tongue, looking to Dirk, confused.

He shrugged in a 'don't look at me' way, turning back to the neglected food. "Here, you must be hungry." He passed both sandwiches to Karkat, pointedly not looking at Dave.

Dave stared at Dirk disapprovingly; the last time Dirk skipped eating like this, but worse, he had gotten a bit sick and Dave had to help him get better. He ignored Dave's disapproving look, he wasn't as important as Dave's health. CPS didn't give a shit if he was the one starving, only if Dave was eating enough. "Eat them both. You look like you need it."

"..." Karkat picked a sandwich up curiously and looked at it for a while before taking a bite, chewing and swallowing it. "The fuck is this?"

Dave blinked curiously, turning to Karkat. "It's a sandwich, flour, which is ground wheat, and a bunch of other stuffed mixed up together, then cooked and sliced up with honey on it."

"Oh... Bee sap and ground seed." He pulled it apart and licked the 'Bee sap' "The Bee sap is a luxury ingredient. I haven't had this since I was a young wriggler..."

"'Wriggler'...........?" Dave blinked a few more times, pulling his head away and giving Karkat a sceptical look. He turned to Dirk like he was looking for help before waving a hand about like 'oh whatever' and leaving the room. "I'm gonna make some more. And you're gonna eat it this time Dirk!"

"... You don't eat a lot, do you?" Karkat quickly said to Dirk, before he could say anything. It was about time he figured out what these humans were about.

He turned to Karkat in surprise, even Dave hadn't caught on to his eating habits (or lack thereof) so fast. "You just need the grub more. I eat plenty." That lie didn't work on Dave anymore, but maybe the troll would believe it.

"I'm fine. I can redigest my heart if I need to in order to live without food for several sweeps" The troll commented as he continued to lick the bee sap, keeping a straight face.

"That sounds... painful." He concluded, watching Karkat lick the honey off the bread. Hopefully, the matter of his eating habits was dropped, Dave hounded him enough about it.

"I was joking about the heart thing. Only snakes do that." He finished licking the bee sap, but didn't eat the bread or fillings.

"What do you normally eat?" Dirk quizzed, curious.

"Anything I can get my hands on. Animals, vegetables, wild herbs and berries. I wasn't able to get royal foods, or anything. I ate what I found. If I saw a grub on the floor, and I was starving, I would eat it."

Dirk frowned. "Well you don't have to do that anymore. Eat the bread and the other stuff too." He leaned back, not really looking forward to having Dave stare at him to make sure he ate...

He shook his head. "I ate a sparrow before I got here... I this... place." Karkat laughed a little at himself. "It was going to die anyway, It wasn't really moving on the- Actually, never mind." It confused him why he was so open to these humans. Could he really trust them? He would never know now.

Dave magically appears back in the door. "Eat it. You need it." He shoves the sandwich he had made, the same as the others, into Dirk's hands, giving him another stern stare even though his face was once more covered by his shades. "Both of you." He crossed his arms and leaned against a nearby wall, watching them intensely. Karkat looked up at Dave for a second before he begins to lick the inside of the sandwich again, this time enjoying the flavours more thoroughly.

Dirk mumbled a 'called it' under his breath, even as he took a reluctant bite. His throat felt like it was tightening, going 'nope, denied' towards the food in his mouth. He forced himself to swallow it, looking over at Dave. It was harder to eat than he remembered, his throat hurting as the bite went down.

Dave relaxed a bit, satisfied that Dirk wasn't going to shrivel up into nothingness out of hunger and die. He did look at Karkat curiously though as he licked the food instead of just eating it normally. "Why don't you just bite it? Chew it?" He asked, literally asking, confused.

"Bee Sap is a luxury ingredient to have, especially for a mutant." He replied as he continued to lick it. He was not interested in the other part of the sandwich, just the honey.

"'bee sap' also tastes really nice with bread, you should try it."

He shakes his head. "I want to take things slow, if you don't mind" He was more of a vegetarian eater, but non the less, he was not interested in the bread. At all.

Totally heard what Karkat said wrong, Dave shakes his head, turning to Dirk as he put the sandwich down and spoke.

"I can't Dave, it is literally painful for me to try and eat this." He didn't look at Dave, didn't want to acknowledge that he was shit at taking care of himself. Even Karkat, who had a pretty weird diet, looked healthier than him weight-to-body wise.

“Soup then?" He asked, he didn't want Dirk to not eat anything; it wasn't healthy and he didn't want his only brother to be hurt or worse.

"Dirk... Are you done with my... wound?" Karkat question, his hands becoming ice cold to touch, and he was getting Goosebumps all over his skin.

Dirk nodded "Yeah, get Dave to wrap it up. His stomach felt tight, his hunger brought forwards by the small bite. But he couldn't eat anything solid, it made his throat clamp. "Dave, make some soup?" He made sure to get across that he was going to eat it, if that didn't make Dave willing to make it nothing would. Karkat begins to cuddle himself up, freezing in the elements, even though it was warmish inside compared to his life on the run.

"What do you want me to do? Wrap up his wounds or make some soup?" Confused, conflicted, what? "I can't do both at the same time........ wait." Dave pauses, looking at the two for a moment before flash-stepping into the kitchen, grabbing some soup from the cupboard then flashing away to grab a bowl and then again to open the can and put it in the bowl then put it into the microwave, all within ten seconds. He flashed back to the two after turning the microwave on for a few minutes, grabbing the bandages and flashing to Karkat, easily wrapping the cloth around his wounds before seeing how he was shaking. He was only just starting to get tired from flash stepping when he returned to the two with the blanket from the couch, holding it before himself to Karkat. "You're probably going to stay cold if you keep wearing those clothes." He said before tossing the sheet on him, flashing away to his room, grabbing a spare red t-shirt and some cargo pants before flashing to the two again and tossing the clothes over Karkat's head, letting out a sigh of relief at finally finishing.

"Jesus Dave, I meant _after_ you took care of his wound." Dirk said as he pushed himself up, hunger not doing much good for his strength. He followed his nose to the soup in the microwave, and sat down at the table.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> turntechGodhead [] joined chat.  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "You can leave notes here whever you guys feel like it so have fun. If you have something big coming up and you aren't going to be on for a while just set it as the topic, it's fine. :3 ~ Ash".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "That means post here so that I don't feel lonely when you two aren't on! D: ~ Ash".  
> turntechGodhead [] disconnected.


	5. Chapter 5

Karkat stifled a cough as he snuggled into the blanket, or sheet, or whatever. "T..Th-" He stopped himself, for an unknown reason. WHY WAS HE SO NICE TO AN ENEMY TO HIS KIND?

Dave waved Karkat off. "'Tis fine. Now get your butt over to the couch." He pointed down the hall to the living room, offering a hand to help Karkat if he wanted it.

Karkat doesn't take Dave's have and he eventually gets over to the couch, like he was asked to, before he began to snuggle up in everything he was in and turning into a cone shaped scenario. He looked at Dave somewhat intensely, Not knowing what to make of this human at all really, as of currently, he was just being a semi-humongous ass-fuck of a human, but this was only an hour into actually talking to the human, nothing to judge on time wise anyway.

Once the microwave beeped, Dirk was slow to get the soup out. A part of his mind was still rebelling, but he ignored it in favour for not disappointing Dave anymore today. He spooned up a small bit if it and took a cautious sip, head cocked to listen to Dave and the troll's conversation.

Dave just blinked at Karkat before smirking slightly at how he was all curled up. He wouldn't say it aloud but it was sort of cute. He looked over to Dirk, face stern in a way to tell his brother that Dave wasn't above literally spoon feeding Dirk if he didn't eat enough.

Dirk once again ignored Dave's look in favour of the small sips he was taking. It wasn't like Dave was strong enough to restrain him long enough to force-feed him anyway. He still sipped at the soup, actually swallowing far less than it looked like.

Dave soon dropped his staring with Dirk, shuffling back into his room and shutting the door, choosing to fill up his spare free time with mixing some music on his turn tables. So far the beat was fast and quick but had a good set rhythm to it as Dave mixed in some extra sounds, trying to perfect the music's flow.

Karkat was slightly drifting off, maybe this being the most comfortable he would ever be in the near future, but that didn't matter as of now. He needed sleep, the exhaustion severely getting to him, mentally as his eyes weren't able to keep open, along with the blasted headache he had gotten, but also physical, the dark grey, which could be black you wouldn't know with his skin colour. He slanted to the side before flopping longways along the couch, finally at peace for now.

As soon as Dirk’s stomach stopped tying itself in knots he quietly put the spoon down and got up to place the bowl in the fridge. The troll could eat the rest later. Speaking of, he glanced onto the couch, finding him fast asleep. Who knew the 'scary trolls' were all so cute, like little kids who needed someone to care for them.

Dave eventually pokes his head back out, music still beating behind him as he glanced about before stopping his eyes upon Karkat, asleep on the couch. He did his best to not smile but let the corners of his mouth twitch up after disappearing back into his room to turn off his music so as not to wake the sleeping troll. He came back out though, camera in hand as he took a photo of the troll, smirking to dirk afterwards. "I’m allowed to tell my friends right?" He asked, just checking, making sure.

His brother sighed. "As long as it won't get me in trouble." He was thankful Dave had missed him not eating much of the soup. He moved out of Dave's way so he could get a clear shot of the camera.

Dave took a few more pictures from varying angles before finally being satisfied with his work and returning to his bedroom, being quiet when shutting the door this time as he walked over to his computer He used his foot to turn it on before sitting on his bed, flicking through the photos while waiting for the PC to fire up.

The computer eventually starts up and Dave pulled the connecting cord out, plugging one end into the camera with one hand while the other unlocks his computer. He's soon opened up pesterchum, plugging the other end of the connecting cord into the PC tower and placing the electronic device on the other end on his desk carefully.

Dirk walked quietly past Dave's door, poking at his sides, starting to feel ribs. Shit, he'd have to eat more to cover them over again. Or avoid hugs for a while from Dave, not that that would be hard. He walked into his own room and grabbed his sword, starting to sharpen it idly.

Dave sort of smiled upon seeing Jade come online, almost instantly beginning to pester her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> anonymous [??] joined chat. (Ash: oh dear)  
> anonymous [??] is now Erisolsprite [ERISOLSPRITE]. (Ash: we have a party crasher)  
> ERISOLSPRITE: *fliip2 off evveryone* (Ash: :I da fuq?)  
> carcinoGeneticist [] kicked Erisolsprite [ERISOLSPRITE] from the chat. (Bec: I got no idea)  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "e_e... ~ Ash".


	6. Chapter 6

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] --

TG: sup harley

Jade turned to glance at the name in the corner of the pesterlog chat window that had opened up on her screen, grinning in delight at the name. She quickly clicked on it.

GG: Dave!!

TG: youre not gonna believe what happened to me today

GG: What? Did your Bro get into another cop chase??

TG: ha nah

TG: but that could have been a possibility

TG: but it didnt happen thankfully

GG: Thankfully?! What happened?!

TG: i was just walking home really

TG: heard a noise down one of the alleyways

GG: Oh?

TG: went to check it out

TG: some dude was hiding in trashbags

TG: seemed hurt or something

TG: i tried to help

GG: Oh no, was he ok?

TG: he was wounded

GG: D:

TG: although

TG: turns out hes a troll and is currently asleep on the couch in our apartment

GG: Ohmygod! You mean the same kind of trolls that kill humans?!

TG: hes literally harmless i think

GG: YOU THINK?

TG: hes a total scardy cat

TG: i got a picture of him sleeping

TG: you tell me if you think that this is a deadly killing machine

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] sent gardenGnostic [GG] image sleepytroll.png --

TG: see

GG: AWW

TG: ikr

TG: but the other trolls did try to kill him i think

TG: something about a blood mutation

TG: btw they speak english

GG: The poor thing!

GG: Speaking of mutations

TG: uh

GG: Does Mr. Sleepy troll know about your eyes?

TG: no

TG: wait

TG: what

TG: i didn’t

TG: how did you

TG: …………

TG: im blaming dirk for this

GG: Hehehe, and how is your bro?

TG: hes a skinny fucker right now

TG: im trying to get him to eat

TG: he was having some soup before cause he couldnt eat a sandwich

GG: Oh no, are you going to check to see if he ate it all?

TG: should i

GG: Are you worried?

TG: yeah

TG: but if he doesnt eat hell get sick

TG: and i can blame him for it

TG: and hopefully hell learn his lesson

GG: Maybe he has a reason for not eating?

GG: You should ask him!

TG: hes probs not gonna tell me

GG: You're his little bro! Make him tell you!

TG: still

TG: i dont see the point

TG: hes just being a little wimp is all

TG: if it goes too far ill literally try to tie him up and force feed him

TG: no jk

GG: Hehe! That's an amusing thought

TG: it kinda is

GG: The big, fast Dirk Strider tied down by his little bro and being fed like a baby!

TG: haha

TG: im not fazed

TG: the troll seems to eat anything hes given

TG: but im not joking about the forcing dirk to eat bit

GG: I know, I bet he worries about you a lot more than you think!

TG: i kinda sorta do know

TG: sorta

TG: like

TG: uh

TG: he was seriously protective of me earlier

GG: Maybe that's why he doesn't eat? Because he's worried about YOUR health?

GG: Wait, really?

TG: yeah

TG: with the troll and all

TG: and i may or may not have acted a bit like that as well

TG: no biggie

GG: Awwww

TG: its not that interesting

GG: Still, you should think about reasons why your bro may be starving himself. It's obviously for you.

TG: but i dont like him starving himself like he is

TG: its mentally painful for me

GG: How bad is it?

TG: i swear i could feel ribs when i hugged him earlier

GG: D: Maybe you should start force feeding him now

TG: i think i might

TG: brb gonna go tie him up

TG: oh wait

TG: i cant

TG: it would look wierd to the troll

TG: i said nothing

TG: you saw nothing

GG: Aww

TG: dont let jake know

TG: hell tell dirk

GG: You shouldn't care what the troll thinks! This is for your brother's health!

TG: yes yes yes

TG: i bow before your wisdom

TG: it is almighty

GG: mean Dave!

TG: like gog

TG: is there such thing as gog

TG: i dont even

GG: I dunno, what is 'gog'?

TG: idk

TG: the troll said it

TG: like

GG: Oh, what if it's like

TG: um

GG: a troll swear?

TG: heh

TG: sounds like a misspelling of god

GG: Huh it kinda does!

TG: haha

TG: but yeah

TG: i gots a troll

TG: in my apartment

TG: its asleep

TG: in my apartment

GG: Just be careful Dave!

TG: oh noes its attacking me right now

TG: ahhhhhh

TG: im fucking scared shitless

TG: help me jade

GG: Dave! Don't joke about that!

TG: youre only over a million miles away

TG: you can still help

GG: Dave, stop fooling around! As if I'd have time to help you if your brother is as protective as you say he is!

TG: hush you

TG: what about jake

TG: doesnt he mother you at all or anything

GG: I knooow

GG: He's all 'you need to learn to protect yourself little miss'

TG: hahaha

GG: And he always wants me to use the big heavy guns :x

TG: are you sticking with your rifle or accepting the 'help'

GG: My rifle of course! It's a perfectly fine gun!

TG: agreed

TG: court adjourned

TG: case closed

TG: this mystery is solved

GG: What about you, still sharpening your skills against Dirk?

GG: hehe

TG: strifing happens occasionally

TG: but its getting rarer and rarer

TG: like black rhinos

TG: wait

TG: theyre extinct

TG: this simile doesnt work

GG: Think it has something to do with his skinniness?

TG: yeah probs

GG: Or maybe your touch does something to him ;D

GG: hehehe!

TG: oh yes totally

TG: you know when dirks not around

TG: i go into his room to smell his scent

TG: its all over the place

TG: real nice too

GG: Oh my god Dave! XD

GG: You're not serious!

TG: what gave it away

GG: You wouldn't be so forward about it if you really liked it

TG: hahaha

TG: yeah

TG: i was totally pulling your leg there

GG: hehe! Oh no- Jake wants to take me hunting

TG: hah

TG: have fun then i guess

TG: dont kill any endangered species

GG: I want to stay though :(

TG: im gonna talk to the others anyway

GG: awww, ok, bye then!

TG: you cant see me but im totally waving my hand right now

TG: cya

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] --

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] --

TG: sup egderp

EB: oh, hey dave!

EB: what's going on?

TG: stuff

TG: city

TG: night

TG: i got a troll in my apartment

TG: ta da

EB: what???? aren't they really dangerous?

TG: this guys a big baby and hes kinda hurt

EB: aww

TG: i gots an image of him

TG: wanna see

EB: show me!

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] sent ectoBiologist [EB] image sleepytroll.png --

EB: ahahaha you were right!

EB: what's with the shadow near the edge?

EB: oh- is that dirk?

TG: yeah

TG: oh shit

TG: you havent seen him have you

EB: i can't really make him out, he's out of focus

TG: take that as a no

TG: he basically looks like me

TG: but with spiky anime style hair

TG: and hes skinny as fuck

EB: oh no, not another dave! XP

TG: and fuck you

EB: wow, he must be anorexic for YOU to call him a 'skinny fuck'

TG: yeah

TG: not too happy with that

TG: im planning on literally tying him down and trying to spoon feed him

EB: oh wow, i was joking! i didn't know your brother literally WAS anorexic!

TG: fuck

TG: hes anorexic fuck

TG: uhhhhhh

EB: huh?

TG: i have no fucking idea how to deal with this

TG: i could literally tie him down

TG: but like

EB: isn't he stronger than you?

TG: yeah

TG: but hes such a skinny ass fucker

TG: i got more body mass

TG: but hes probs gonna not want to be around me if i try to feed him like that

EB: won't he understand it's for his own good?

EB: or like, do the strife thing!

TG: he doesnt seem to like strifing

TG: not anymore i think

TG: its hard to explain

EB: isn't that like, how you guys bond?

TG: nyeeeeeeeeeh

TG: cant be bothered answering that with proper words

EB: err

TG: its hard

TG: seriously

EB: try?

TG: youre making me use my head

TG: but ok

TG: um

TG: sometimes i dont really feel that close to him and other times hes like the only person i have

TG: it changes a lot of the time

EB: huh, how does he feel about that?

TG: idk

TG: i cant read him like a book

TG: its not that easy

EB: just ask him then!

TG: you dont just

TG: ASK

TG: you just dont

EB: he's your bro, I'm sure he can't deny you!

TG: im gonna try to talk to him later

TG: if it doesnt work

TG: ill just try to spoon feed him

EB: hehehehe

TG: it may or may not work

EB: best of luck!

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] --

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] --

TG: hey rose

TT: Hello Dave. May I inquire as to your evening?

TG: jam packed with action

TG: bombs

TG: explosions

TG: guns

TG: swords

TG: that kind of thing

TG: the usual

TT: Sounds like an absolutely thrilling experience.

TG: it was

TG: it also involved a highspeed car chase

TG: the whole city was chasing us

TT: I take it that Dirk was his usual self and gave the local police heartburn from anger?

TG: yes

TG: correct

TT: From your tone, I take it he is causing you some distress as well?

TG: i think we need a new car

TG: oh shit the cops are banging at my door

TG: welp im fucked

TT: In all seriousness, what truly happened this evening?

TG: ok i lied about most of that

TT: I figured.

TG: note the most

TG: there were guns and swords involved

TG: and dirk driving like a maniac

TG: dont forget that

TT: When isn't your brother doing his best to defy road laws?

TG: never

TG: he is probably doing it in his sleep

TG: sleep driving

TG: who knew

TG: not i

TT: And don't think I didn't notice how you refused to respond to my enquiry towards how much Dirk is aggravating you.

TG: i have the right to remain silent dont i

TT: Yet you keep rising to my bait.

TT: So,

TT: What is troubling your relationship with your brother?

TG: hes a skinny fucker and not eating

TG: its getting on my nerves

TT: Does this have anything to do with the 'car chase' you participated in this evening?

TG: he was as skinny as he was then as he is now

TG: and he was helping me then so meh

TG: dont care about that part

TT: With what may I enquire?

TT: Hmm?

TT: Dave, staying silent only makes me more curious.

TG: shh im typing

TG: i was walking home when i heard a noise from an alleyway and i went in and i found some guy hiding in trashbags and i tried to help him and i saw he was a troll and was wounded i called dirk and he came and picked us up and then there was a mob of angry trolls coming to try and kill both him and i and then there was that highspeed car chase thing all the way home but no people chasing us and we sorta helped the guy out and gave him food and now there is a troll currently sleeping on the couch in our living room so take a fucking look at this image and see if you dont believe me

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] sent tentacleTherapist [TT] image sleepytroll.png --

TT: Curious

TG: any tips you gonna give me or no

TT: What help could I possibly give into the psychology of this troll?

TG: hes a loud ass shit bag who doesnt like things

TG: he shouts a lot

TG: doesnt like to accept help

TT: Yet he let you and your brother do so.

TG: ignoring that comment

TG: really grumpy

TG: hates the world

TG: also he has a blood mutation

TT: Hmm, I assume that is why he was injured?

TG: yeah

TT: And what are you going to do with him?

TG: i helped wrap his wounds up and he seems fine for now

TG: im just wondering if hes gonna leave by himself or we have to kick him out or something

TT: And your brother?

TG: im planning on spoon feeding him if he doesnt start eating some time soon

TT: He always did need taking care of; it seems you'll need to keep an eye on him.

TG: you dont take me seriously enough

TT: Maybe you just underestimate how worried Roxy and I are for you two.

TG: i dont get it

TG: besides

TG: where the fuck do you two live again

TG: i forgot

TG: for the billionth time

TT: Roxy and I live nearby remember. We are only a few blocks away from you and your brother.

TG: shit

TG: are you already on your way over

TG: like

TG: messaging me on your phone

TG: please dont be

TT: It is far too late, and Roxy is asleep.

TT: And you, unfortunately, know how hard it is to wake a sleeping Roxy.

TT: Thus making it practically impossible for me to attempt any form of meeting as of yet.

TT: Expect us in the morning however.

TG: fuck

TG: ok

TG: just gonna lock down the garage

TG: and the building front door

TG: and break the elevator

TG: and block the stairs

TG: and lock our door

TG: and barricade it

TG: in other words

TG: if you come here before noon imma kick your ass to china

TT: I feel so welcomed.

TT: I suppose I have kept you from the worry over your brother in the back of your mind enough.

TT: And don't deny it Dave, we all know you love him.

TG: f u ok just stfu

TT: Roxy and I will see you tomorrow.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] --

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "Bec, GET CHU ASS ON SKYPE! ~ Ash :3".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "YOU NEVER SAID PLEASE ~ Bec >:]".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "FUCK YOU I MAKE THESE RULES! *flips Bec's couch* ~ Ash >:I".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "*Cries because mysterious couch was flipped* YOU EVIL EVIL LITTLE GIRL >:O ~ Bec >:[".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "THANK YOU! ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "BLARGH ~ Bec".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "It was very important so thank you ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "You are welcome ~ Bec".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "We still friends? ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "No ~ Bec".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "D: ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to ">:] ~ Bec".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "Bad girl! ~ Ash".  
> turntechGodhead [] silenced carcinoGeneticist [CG].  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to ">:] ~ Ash".  
> turntechGodhead [] unsilenced carcinoGeneticist [CG].  
> carcinoGeneticist [] disconnected.  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "D: ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist [] joined chat.  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to ":D ~ Ash".  
> (( Since I cannot topic talk, I will bracket talk instead. ~  
> turntechGodhead [] set carcinoGeneticist [CG] to Professional Wet Blanket. They can now silence, kick and ban other users.  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "What was that you just said? ;) ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "You want the booty, you gotta ask the cutie ~ Bec".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "I want the booty, yes, I want it ;D ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "Booty ~ Bec".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "*Le touches booty* .O. it's.... magnificent! ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "*Blushes at touch* >:P - Bec".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "*insert evil triumphant laugh here, stealz de booty* >:D ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "*Is ripped in half, laying on the cold hard ground, DEAD* ~ Bec".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "*Don't care because I gotz de booty!!!!!!* >:D ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "Dead ~ Bec".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "This got way off topic... :/ ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "Dead ~ Bec".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "Ok, enough, please, stop. ~ Ash".


	7. Chapter 7

Dave pushed away from the computer, satisfied and a bit bothered with his friends, unplugging the camera and dropping the cord on his previously occupied seat before sticking his head into the living room, checking on the others.

He was still in his room, sharpening his sword. He thought over how little he'd eaten, if he was lucky he could sneak back and eat enough to hide his ribs again. He placed his sword back down and stepped out into the hall, stopping short of running into Dave. Luck was not on his side.

Dave leaned back on the sudden appearance on Dirk, pausing and looking at him curiously before drawing his eyebrows together, thinking. "What are you going to do?" He asked, voice gone into that stern tone to show Dirk that he wasn't joking as he shuffled out of his room, closing the door behind him and leaning on it.

"I was coming out to check on the troll" He rocked against the wall, as long as Dave didn't touch him or lift his shirt he should be safe. "What, am I not allowed to make sure my little bro is safe any more?" He made to move past Dave as if nothing was wrong, that he wasn't hiding the effects that not eating were having. 'He can still see your body getting thinner.' his mind whispered to him.

Dave squinted his eyes behind his shades, staring at Dirk for a few moments, letting him get further away before finally speaking when he thought Dirk was thinking he was out of trouble. "Roxy and Rose are coming tomorrow." He stated, arms folding over his chest and one foot coming up to lean behind him, staring at Dirk, not just his face but his body as well, trying to look pissed instead of worried.

Dirk paused mid-step, mind racing. Fuck, Roxy would know immediately that something was wrong, and convince him to tell her. And then she'd tell Dave and he'd never get out of Dave's view. He resisted the urge to pull on his shirt, his usual nervous habit, as it would show Dave just what he was trying to hide. "Why are they doing that?"

Dave shrugged noncommittally, looking down the hall towards the living room. "I just talked to Rose over pesterchum and she claimed that they were coming over tomorrow. Hopefully they took me seriously and don't arrive before noon, if we're lucky. Rose probably just wants to check the troll out," He shrugs again, focusing on Dirk this time, "that and they are probably just gonna check up on us, make sure we're fine or summin'."

"Why wouldn't we be?" Almost immediately after he said that, he realised he'd pretty much given it away that he was hiding something. "Anyway, I should check on the troll" He turned his back to Dave again, debating whether to actually check up on the troll or abscond to his room.

Dave quickly followed after Dirk, determined as he roughly grabbed his shoulders and pushed Dirk against the wall, arm held across his chest to pin him even though he knew Dirk was strong enough to push him off. He kept his face emotionless aside from how the corners of his lips were turned down slightly. "Go. Eat. I'll deal with the troll. Got it?" He said, clearly not in the mood to negotiate.

His brother swallowed nervously. "I already have Dave" Shit, what was his brain making him say? That would only make Dave angrier. In his normal condition he could easily beat Dave. Fighting him while (admittedly) on the verge of being classified as anorexic? That would be a quick road to defeat.

Dave scowled behind his shades, unable to hold it back. "You _know_ what I mean! Just _EAT_ something for Christ’s sake! I'm not joking about spoon feeding you! I swear it!" He pushed lightly against Dirk's chest with his forearm, pinning him there for as long as he could before Dirk got too pissy.

Shit, Dave was mad. Dirk couldn't help it, he tensed and balled his fists into the bottom of his shirt. He looked down and noticed the faint outline of the beginning of his ribs, and quickly let go. "I'm fine Dave. I can take care of myself." He knew though, Dave wasn't going to let him go. His little brother was like a little terrier when he was determined.  
"Go eat something! Now you stupid shit head!" Dave pulled back, whacking a hand at the side of Dirk's head, not enough to hurt badly but enough to let Dirk know he was literally pissed at him. "Go eat, now, eat _SOMETHING_!" He spat out, using his anger to hide how worried he was. If he wasn't mad he would probably be on the verge of tears with his worry, afraid that Dirk could get too sick...

Dirk winced. God damn it, he was supposed to be protecting Dave so he didn't cry any more. He didn't think, he just wrapped his arms around Dave. He didn't care if Dave could fell and pretty much count his ribs. He just had to cheer up Dave, let him know it was ok. And maybe... He needed to be forced, to get himself back on track.

Dave froze up when Dirk hugged him, stuck between pushing Dirk away and hugging him back. He was really mad at Dirk for letting himself get this skinny... this skinny. He paused, reaching his hands up and holding onto Dirk's sides, feeling his brother’s ribs sticking out so prominently. He let out a small sigh, wrapping his arms around dirk, still holding his hands on his sides but left on right and right on left, trying to calm down. It was really hard when Dave could feel how sick Dirk was. "You stupid fucker..." He said sadly, worried and a little frightened.

He nodded against Dave's head. "I didn't want you to worry about yourself, and whether you were eating enough." His hand ran though Dave's hair, trying to... trying to... he didn't know if he was trying to calm himself or Dave more. He knew he had a problem; he should have stopped when food was no longer scarce, but his body kept going. "My body's fucked up right now" now that Dave knew, he didn't know what to feel...

"Just go eat something, ok? Did you finish the soup at least?" Dave asked, pulling back enough so that he can rest his forehead just lightly against Dirk's, looking through the pointy shades he wore so easily with their close proximity as he is sure Dirk can see through his. He scanned his brother's eyes; searching for the answers he was too frightened internally to voice.

He couldn't look Dave in the eyes. He'd barely even gone halfway into the soup. He pulled away a little, figuring that Dave was disappointed in him. "Dave... What's on your mind?" He wanted to stall, to stop his body from tensing at the thought of trying to eat more. Fuck, why hadn't he noticed when his attempt to feed Dave morphed into an eating disorder? He wasn't like those anorexic girls who starved themselves to be beautiful, so why was his body deciding to punish itself?!

"I'm worried about you, fuck, why the hell wouldn't I be? Why wouldn't anyone else be worried if their brother was literally starving themselves so much that their ribs can be felt in a hug? If you keep this up you're going to get sick! Or worse..." Dave trailed off, wincing internally, the thought of loosing Dirk painful. "I don't want to lose you..." He said softly, he pulled Dirk back into the hug, hiding his head in Dirk's shoulder.

Ouch, Dirk’s heart suddenly felt painful. "Dave... Fuck, I want to eat and be healthy again, but my body's become too fucked up to eat that much..." He slowly moved them both into the kitchen. He hated the idea, but he was going to force himself to eat some more. Dave was worth it. Fuck, Rose and Roxy were too. He needed to get better. For them.

Dave didn't notice Karkat stirring awake, choosing to stick close to Dirk's side, looking in the fridge and seeing the soup. His shoulders slumped a bit, sad that Dirk didn't eat that much soup but glad that he had the decency to put it in the fridge to possibly eat later when he got around to it. He pulled the bowl out, holding it towards Dirk in one hand, shutting the fridge in the other. "You gotta eat it. No escaping. If you don't like the taste try dipping bread or biscuits or _SOMETHING_ into them and eat that but you have to eat something." Dave was trying not to sound too desperate, but he only partially managed to do so.

"It's not the taste" He couldn't figure out how to explain to Dave without making him feel guilty. He grabbed the bowl off Dave and sat down, forcing his hand to lift the spoon full of cold soup out of the bowl. Fuck, it was taking so much willpower, but he felt Dave's eyes on him, watching almost desperately for him to eat. He tipped the soup quickly into his mouth, barely letting the taste register as he swallowed. He panted a little, stomach already complaining about the unfamiliar feeling of being fed extra.

Dave winced internally at how Dirk was behaving and he slid to beside him, resting a hand on Dirk, thanking him? Comforting him? Comforting who? Dave wasn't sure so he soon removed his hand, choosing for trying to make some food for the troll instead. Instant noodles should do the trick he supposes and he tosses two packets into two bowls, preparing the one for Karkat first and putting it in the microwave while getting the other ready, glancing at Dirk more than once, worried.

He looked at Dave, 'I'm trying' his thoughts whined. His arm was robotic; bringing the spoon to his mouth like clockwork so he could swallow the soup before his throat could register it was even there. He had to be careful though, if he ate the whole thing his hard work would just be lost since he'd probably throw it back up... Nope, not letting Dave think he was doing this deliberately.

Unknown to Karkat of the conversations that had occurred, he began to stir himself awake on the couch. He was not sure where he was when he woke up, for the first thirty or so seconds, but he remained calm, cool and collected. He honestly was not in the mood to make himself look like a jackass because of his opinions and how much bullshit they are. Instead, he yawned, sat up casually and snuggled into the blanket some more. He felt lighter, as if he was a little healthier actually.

He sat on the couch, out of everyone's view and stayed quiet. He was still adjusting to the architectural design of the humans hive and was attempting to try and memorize what is where, t familiarize himself. There weren't many outstanding features, the rectangle on the wall was a very piss poor artwork, the bricks with buttons in them on the table were... childish. Do humans play robots when they are mature? Weirdos.

After sitting there bored for an extremely long time, Karkat decided to get up and walk around- that was until he fell over due to his knee being in immense pain. The troll wasn't even aware of the severity of the wound until this point currently. It annoyed him secretly as he lay on the floor, clutching his knee and muffling a long string of bogus curse words.

Dave blinked a few times, hearing some noises and walking over in the direction he last saw Karkat, pausing and staring at Karkat lying on the floor in pain. After getting over the initial shock Dave went over to his side, hooking one arm under Karkat's and lifting him up to standing, making sure to be on the side of the leg that was wounded so Karkat could lean on him. "I see you're awake now. Need any assistance or are you gonna keep up the tsundere act?"

He sighs as he is assisted off the ground. "Yes I am awake. Clearly. Congratulations, you passed the completely impossible test that includes the 'Captain fucking Obvious' award and it features the all might 'No shit' medal, which I can gladly present to you in another meaningful time in the near future." His voice was croaky, but it was enough to convey himself at the present time. He began to lean against the Dave human in order to maintain his stability. Dave rolled his eyes at the troll's comment.

Dirk started to get out of his chair to check on the troll, but figured that Dave had it under control. He looked at his reflection in the soup that was left, noticing how sharp the angles of his face had become. He dropped the spoon into it, rippling the image away. "Dave, if I eat any more I'm going to throw it all up." He called, putting the soup back in the fridge again.

Dirk’s brother looked towards the kitchen with worry, leading Karkat that way anyways and sitting him on a chair, walking swiftly into the kitchen and towards Dirk. "How much did you eat?" He asked, face uncharacteristically displaying his worry. He placed a hand on Dirk's shoulder, this time trying to comfort Dirk for sure.

"I'm fine Dave, just gotta take it slow." Dirk put his hand over Dave's, offering silent reassurance. He felt a laugh bubble up, at times like these _he_ felt like the little brother. He forced the laugh down; Dave would probably think he was insane if he started cackling for no reason. "How's the troll?"

"Karkat" He simply commented, hoping that, for gog sake the humans actually remember his name.

"Karkat's right there, I think you can ask him yourself." Dave said simply, squeezing Dirk's shoulder once before dropping his hand back to his side. Pulling the noodles out of the microwave and replacing it with the other bowl, pressing a few buttons and letting that heat up before adding in the flavour to the heated ones, a fork being used to mix it before he set it on the bench to cool down.

He walked out into the lounge room. "So... Karkat? How are you?" He sat down on a dining chair, facing the troll.

"...Sore. I'm not tired anymore though." The troll’s voice was very quiet, which was not very normal for him to be this quiet, as he looked down at his hands, which were in a ball together in his lap. "My muscles aren't screaming at me either..." He curled up a little "My knee though..." He didn't finish as his voice drifted away.

When the other bowl of noodles was done Dave took it out, mixing the flavour into it and leaving it on the bench, carrying the other bowl, which had cooled down to a reasonable level, over to Karkat and dirk, setting it on the table closer to Karkat. "Got you some food, try to eat as much as you can. And just so you don't freak out, we got two friends coming over. They're both cousins and they won't tell anyone that you're here."

He nodded in agreement. "They're going to be too busy screeching at me to annoy you." He leaned back and shut his eyes.

"Fun. They're gonna blame me for not making you eat enough food." Dave stated, walking back to the kitchen to grab his own bowl before walking back, sitting on the other side of the table and eating, blowing on his food since it was still a bit too hot.

He looked up a little but looked down again after nodding in agreement. From what he knew, Dirk didn't eat much, kind of like him. He looked down his top and saw his rib cage, sticking out of his skin. He was malnourished as well, but it isn't exactly noticeable since Troll skin is extremely thick.

He shook his head "No, Roxy'll make me spill, and call me an idiot and hit me and She'll tell Rose and they'll tie me up in the kitchen or something." Ok, so the tying up bit was a bit of an exaggeration, but still. Rose and Roxy were scary when on a mission

He took the bowl of noodles and began to eat them, before putting the down. They exploded with flavour and it took him a while to swallow one mouthful

Sort of looking at the two oddly, eating his noodles like a normal person for a few bites before clearing his mouth to speak. "Please tell me I'm not the only one who eats food normally in this house." He grumbled, only slightly annoyed.

He looked at the troll. "You can't blame Kar; he's a troll. Of course he's gonna eat weird.”

He snarls under his breath as he turns away.

Dave rolls his eyes a bit. "I know but seriously," eats another mouthful, "am I literally the only normal person here? Let alone in our family? Let's see; Karkat is just a troll that we randomly picked up and tried to help out. You, Dirk, are a skinny ass fuck that doesn't eat shit. Rose is a psychoanalytical wizard incestuous porn writer and Roxy has a serious drinking problem. I’m the only normal one, get fucking used to it."

Dirk rolled his eyes "You collect dead shit."

"It's perfectly normal!"

Karkat abruptly slams his fist on the table. "No one is normal here, and no one _WILL EVER BE NORMAL!_ " His eye began to twitch, as if he was going to strangle someone.

The older teen jumped, looking at the troll in surprise. "Whoa, ok, ok." He turned to Dave, face confused about the troll's sudden outburst.

Dave paused; face looking at Karkat, trying to decide on what to do. Instead he simply pushed himself away from the table and walked away to his room, making sure to shut the door louder than necessary before playing his music loudly, trying to ignore and forget the world for a little while, at least for long enough for him to calm down and not scream at someone.

He looks at the dint in the table and claws it a little, leaving marks in it. His other hand was clenched so tightly, it could have gone to a human skin colour.

"Nice going, you've upset him" He couldn't keep the protective growl out of his voice. He hit himself in the head "Shit-sorry. No, no it wasn't you" great, just insult the creature who could probably kick his ass in his current condition.

"No no no no no, that won't do at all, just blame the one who just so fucking happens to not know where he is, has not seen these things in his life-" He picks up a noodle between his claws and eats it "- and has no idea what will be happening regarding his life in the future. No just don't worry about that right now, because of course you have your own things to deal with and that is fine and all but clearly, blaming the asshole who knows as much about the human culture as a fucking wolfbeast is just... Low of you, and coming from the so far friendlier human, that is saying something." He gets up and limps away from the table very slowly. Karkat stood there, on one leg, and watched Dirk from the corner of his eye.

"I'm just frustrated, I'm letting him down." He didn't try to stop him though, He didn't trust the troll's temper. He rubbed at his temple, sighing. "I'm going out for a bit. Keep the door locked and if someone knocks get Dave." He didn't wait for a response before he was out the door and pacing down [the steps](http://msparp.com/chat/fuckitweretooawesomeforurls/log).

Clearly Karkat knows he is not worth being here. Karkat sighed, looking down at his knee before hobbling to the couch and laying down.

He begins to think of his options of this current moment. One: He can leave. This is deemed possibly impractical and impossible at this point. He vaguely remembers how he fucking got here in the first place. Two: He can kill all of the humans. This idea sounded good but that would probably be impractical, unlike what he was brought up on, they have been nice to him for some... strange… reason. They're [lucky](http://msparp.com/chat/fuckitweretooawesomeforurls/log) this time.

Decision decided, he lays there, pretending that he is a ghost and is invisible.

Dave quickly sent a few messages to Rose, not caring if she was asleep or not or whether she answered or not

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] --

TG: i now regret what i previously said

TG: please get here as fast as you can

TG: try to mother these things before i seriously go insane

TG: i dont exactly know what im doing

TT: Why the regret? What is the emergency?

TG: im going to flip my shit on these two one day

TG: hopefully not today

TG: or tonight really

TG: im not looking forward to dealing with them again tonight

TT: Which one was more infuriating? Or is this worry?

TG: its both

TG: the trolls an angry bitch

TG: and dirks just

TG: just

TG: you get over here and deal with them

TG: im gonna stay in my room

TT: I take it your plan to feed your brother did not end well

TG: im not really gonna tie him up

TG: not now

TG: its not really gonna help

TG: he wont trust me

TG: i cant do shit

TT: To be honest, have you tried asking him upfront about the problem?

TG: i

TG: i think

TG: idk

TT: In other words, you haven't

TG: im not going out there

TG: nope

TG: no

TG: rose

TG: this will probably be the only time i say this

TG: but i fucking need your help right now

TT: I will see if I can convince Roxy to drive me there

TG: thank fuck

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] --

Rose pushed away from the computer, walking out of her room and into the lounge

Roxy was, unsurprisingly, on the couch surrounded by bottles. Surprisingly, she had woken up and was currently swallowing some tablets. She didn't appear to have drunk any of the surrounding bottles yet, the ones that had given her the current headache Rose had already cleared away, but she was holding a martini in one hand, prepared.

"Roxy, I need to enquire a favour."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "It is now 11 am ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "7 am, Waking up in the morning~".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "Alright It is 11am. ~Ash jr.".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "I DON'T REMEMBER GETTING PREGNANT! D: ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "ARE WE REALLY DOING THIS AGAIN? ~ BECKY BOO".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "OMFG BECKY BOOOOOOOOOOOOO <33333333333333333333 ~ Ash".


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enter: Roxy & Rose

Dave pushed himself away from the computer, flopping back into his seat with a small sigh and leaning back on his chair, rubbing his face with both hands. He had no fucking idea what to do right now.

He eventually decided and simply returned to mixing his music, trying to not let his thoughts wander or worry more than necessary.

Soon, Rose found herself out the front of the strider's apartment. She knocked firmly on the door, listening to the sounds of movement within. Roxy was still wondering why exactly they were going to visit their cousins, but didn't bother to question Rose.

The door opened, and she looked at Dave who has moved to standing in the hallway after unlocking the front door for them to enter. The apartment was messy (no surprise) but there was a disturbing lack of...

"Where's your brother?"

Dave looked at the two for a moment before responding. "He went for a walk. But the troll's still here."

She nodded, pushing past Dave to walk inside. "And where is this troll of yours?" Roxy just followed Rose silently

Karkat noticed movement around the hive, but pays it no heed. He lays there, scrunched up face, and his knee being a dick. A female voice? Must be- wait. They know about him. It could be others of his species ready to kill him. He takes his sickle out, moving to a hiding spot to be ready just in case.

"Be careful. He's just in here." Dave said, keeping right behind Rose and Roxy after the initial shock of being pushed out of the way.

Rose looked around, waiting for this mysterious troll to appear. "And how long has this troll been in your company dear cousin?" She walked to the edge of the lounge room, noticing the scattered blankets and the fading scent of noodles. Honestly, these boys needed to take care of themselves better, and eat actual cooked meals instead of packaged junk.

Karkat calms himself down, in anticipation of who will be coming into the room. He points his ears towards the door, hoping to get snippets of their conversation.

Dave shrugged noncommittally, tucking his hands into his pockets to hide the way his fingers twitched together and fiddled about. "Not even a few hours ago I think. I dee kay, it was just when I was walking back home and I sorta found him as a pile in an alleyway and i took pity on him and decided 'why the fuck not?' and brought him back here to help. I think I might just..." He moves away to his bedroom, sort of trying to escape. "Yeah, I'm just gonna... if Dirk comes back call for me so I can yell at him."

His cousin sighed. "Of course." She moved further into the room, glancing about to look for the mystery troll.

Rats, Karkat can't hear a thing bar the muffling of their voice. He knows that there are two females and the Dave human therefrom his nose, but who are the two females? He hid in the shadow, away from them all.

"Hey Karkat! Come out now, these two broads aren't gonna hurt you, but they might cause you a headache with their psychoanalytical bullshit of theirs, all on behalf of Rose while Roxy just tries to stay on her feet." He placed a hand on Roxy's shoulder, who was currently swaying slightly and looked to be in course for walking into a doorframe. Dave turned her so that she avoided it.

"Yes, I am fairly curious to see our beloved cousins' guest."

Karkat didn't believe him. He hasn't seen the broads yet, they could be trolls in disguise for all he knew. What the fuck is a broad anyway? Sickle in hand, he was ready to strike, even with his injured knee, instinct was first priority.

"Rose, I think he might have trust issues, so just go out into the open already where he could see you from whatever hidey hole he's got himself hiding inside of and he might come out, I'll guide Roxy after you." Roxy just laughed at Dave as he guided her by the shoulders, soon turning around fully to face him and plant a sloppy family kiss on his head, much to his disgust. "Ew, Rose, help; Roxy intoxicated me with her lips. I need vaccination, stat!"

Rose ignored her cousin in favour for moving to the middle of the room so the troll could see her. Dave lazily guided Roxy after her, keeping the still slightly intoxicated girl at arms length.

Karkat saw this Rose fully and it was a human. He was still ticked off at how she knew of his existence. Carelessly, he lunged from his hiding spot and got his sickle around her neck, hiding behind her, the sharp of the weapon just pinching. "Am I troll enough for you?" He snarled in her ear as his wound on his knee began to bleed again.

She didn't even flinch, figuring that from what Dave told her the troll was more bark than bite at the moment. "I would be able to make a better assumption if I could see you."

Dave instantly left Roxy's side and moved towards Karkat, unable to simply pull the sickle away from Rose's neck and instead opting for flicking a finger at Karkat's forehead. "Dude, let the girl go, she's not gonna hurt you." Karkat only flinched slightly.

"How did you know about me? _WHO TOLD YOU?_ " The troll’s voice was slightly panicked as he was a little sceptical about this human. He dug his sickle a little closer to her neck, threatening to make a wound.

"He was crowing about how adorable you looked while sleeping"

Dave glowered at Rose, suddenly feeling a pang of regret for trying to save her from the troll with a weapon held to her throat. He groaned. "I told her, ok? Let her go for goodness' sake!" He grabbed one of the small nubs and pulled on it.

The troll yelped loudly as he pulled back, and literally fled across the room, holding the sickle in both hands and leaving a small train of blood in the process.

The teenager blinked after the troll, noticing the trail of blood almost instantly. "Shit." He quickly hurried off to the bathroom, soon returning with the first aid kit and slowly moving towards Karkat.

"No, leave it be. Leave me be."

Rose was curious about the troll's reaction to Dave's touch. "Are those horns a, 'G-spot', so to say?"

Karkat looked at the female and nodded, slightly. He raised his sickle up higher.

Dave doesn't like this. "I keep touching those things, they're freaky."

"Curious. Does this sensation feel familiar to when a... 'private' location is contacted?"

Karkat nods again, choosing not to erupt in word vomit in front of the humans.

"Why are we talking about this? Please let's not talk about this!"

"YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE I MAKE YOUR BLOOD THE NEW FLOOR FASHION DESIGN!" Karkat coughed and out came a little blood, but he turned to the female human.

Rose turned to Dave, tilting her head at the sound of feet on stairs, the jiggling of the handle and a swear. "Dave, I believe that your brother has locked himself out and needs some assistance."

Dave just groans in annoyance, tossing the medical at the wall where it opens up slightly, letting a few bandage rolls fall out, one of which lands in the older Lalonde’s hair. Dave didn’t even look back as the medical kit fell to the ground before storming off to the door and unlocking it, flash stepping to his bedroom and shutting the door a bit louder than necessary, wanting to be alone.

Dirk blinked as he stepped inside, not expecting Rose and Roxy to be here so soon. "What brings you two here so fast?"

Karkat held his sickle in shaky hands, lowering it only a little "...I..." He stopped himself, before something dramatic happened.

Rose sent Karkat a small smile before turning to face Dirk fully, absentmindedly removing the bandages from Roxy's hair. "Dave told Roxy and I a reason of concern, two in fact, and I thought we should investigate." She says smoothly, eyes never leaving Dirk.

Karkat saw her smile, lowering his sickle to the floor.

"I am one of... those reasons..." He muttered to himself, wanting to hide his face from the two of them with his hair and he tilts his head down to face the floor.

Dirk backed up a little, "What concerns?" Idiot, obviously the reasons were you and Karkat.

"Roxy and I are more concerned about the other reason for the time being, that other reason being your wellbeing, Dirk." Rose stated matter-of-factly.

"Mmwut? I heard my name?" Roxy finally spoke as she stumbled over her own feet with her half finished martini in hand, trying to stay upright and speak properly.

"I'm perfectly fine, Dave's just being paranoid." He made to push past the girls, to see Karkat there. "Oh, come out of your hidey hole?"

Karkat snarled at Dirk before moving away a little, his movements not very fast due to his leg wound, but by moving, a pool of blood was left behind.

"I'M NOT PARANOID! YOU'RE JUST A SKINNY AS FUCK ANOREXIC!" Dave called from his bedroom.

Rose ignored Dave's comment, glancing at Dirk to check for herself. “Hmm..."

Roxy just stood there, watching the scene without questioning it even though she barely had a clue as to what was going on.

Dirk hated feeling observed, and shifted uncomfortably. "I 'aint a display Rose."

"Clearly you humans have things that need to be sorted out and I am just intruding on them." Karkat finally said out loud, shaking a little when he said it.

"There is no reason for you to leave, troll.” Rose turned to face Dirk. “I apologize for making you nervous of any kind but I am merely checking on your wellbeing, making sure you are okay, but right now you appear to be severely malnourished..." She shook her head as if disappointed. "Have you been eating? If so what have you eaten and of what quantities? And what may I call you, troll?" She turned towards Karkat curiously but moved to press a hand at Dirk's sides, testing his body structure externally.

Dirk flinched away quickly, moving sideways. "Hey, don't touch me!"

"... What is _your_ name?" Karkat stubbornly asked afterwards. Honestly, he was scared, malnourished and injured. Helpless and his pride was almost obliterated.

Roxy just stared at them, stepping back from the conversation yet ready to voice her opinion if or when it was needed.

Rose looked at Dirk sternly before taking a step closer and pressing her fingertips to his sides, almost instantly her face went to confusion then slight sadness as she looked back to Dirk's face and removed her fingers, turning to the troll. "I am Rose Lalonde, this is my sister Roxy Lalonde. We are Dave's and Dirk's cousins."

"... Karkat.” The troll muttered out, loud enough for her to hear him.

Dirk sighed. Great, more people who would hound him about his eating habits. "I'm fine Rose. Roxy, tell her I'm fine."

"And your last name?" Rose questioned after sending a look at Dirk. "Roxy, do not listen to what Dirk thinks until you know what you think."

Karkat begins to pull himself up onto his feet, but slumps back down again after a few moments.

Roxy stayed silent.

"Vantas. And Dirk is fine as he is." He replied, father forcefully, blunt and directly.

"Seriously I'm perfectly fine. There's no need to worry about me." Dirk turned to Karkat, reaching out to help him. "Take it easy, you're hurt..."

"I am fine. I ran on this leg remember." The small snarl of irritation in his voice began to make it's home.

Rose simply nodded, to both of the males, before moving towards Karkat. "If you will, I think it would be wise if I remove your old bandages and replaced them with fresh ones. Roxy, would you mind helping please?"

Roxy nodded slightly, still in her intoxicated state. She wobbled over to the first aid kit to gather some fresh bandages.

"..." Karkat continued to sit on the ground, shivering a little.

"How did you happen upon these injuries?" Rose questioned, kneeling down on the floor with her hands extended in a way she hoped was non-threatening to the troll.

She eventually moved over to Karkat, the bandages in her hand, "T’is might hur’ a li’l..." she tried to act professionally but was seriously regretting getting as drunk as she was.

Dirk moved away from them others, feeling safer with each step. If he could get to his room, he'd probably be safe.

Rose didn't even need to turn her head to know Dirk was trying to sneak away. "Dirk, please come stand beside Karkat so that I have you in my field of view, we are not finished with you as of late."

Shit, god damn it. Dirk reluctantly moved beside Karkat, shifting awkwardly. There was no escaping a woman on a mission

Roxy removed the troll’s dirty bandage carefully before applying a new one. It was a little bit messier than she had hoped, but it was a fairly good job for someone in her state.

"Ahhhhhh FUCK." Karkat shouted out as he bit down onto his lip, unintentionally drawing out blood.

"Shh shh, it’s alright.”

Rose remained stone face, impassive as she studied the wounds carefully, checking for any signs of infection before Roxy covered them up.

Karkat began to let a few tears form in his eyes, the red liquid visible.

Both girls looked up at his face, Roxy with a frown while Rose looked the translucent liquid over curiously, scanning Karkat's curious features; sharp yellow nails, pointed ears, yellow sclera eyes with red filling the iris, the horns on his head.

"Does it relly hurt that much?" Roxy asks.

"Yes..." He quietly replied, as he sniffed a little and a tear became heavy and trailed down his cheek.

She wiped the tear away without saying anything. She had finished up with the bandaging and stood up, a frown still one her face.

Rose hummed softly, thoughtfully, checking the bandages over and fixing them up before standing up with a nod of approval to Roxy. "You did a good job." She then turned to Karkat. "Do you require some painkillers?"

He felt ashamed as the woman brushed away his tear, he was not used to being cared for, by strangers no less. He almost didn't hear what the female human- no wait, her name was Rose Lalonde, he almost didn't hear what Rose said. "N...No." He didn't know what painkillers are anyway.

Dirk sighed, sitting down. He knew if he tried to run, they'd probably get Dave onto him. And Dave was angry as hell at the moment.

Rose seemed to realise her fault after Karkat responded. "Do you wish for something to numb the pain? Make it go away?" She said, defining what a 'painkiller' was.

Karkat looked over at Dirk for a second before shaking his head. "N...No t…tha-" He was going to say 'Thank you', but he needed to salvage any dignity he had anyway.

Dirk looked at Karkat confused. Why did the troll look at him like that?

Rose nodded in respect to the troll before turning her attention to Dirk. "I still require an answer as to my previous questions; what have you eaten lately and how much and what was it?"

Karkat smiled at Dirk, just a little before looking away.

"It... was a bit of soup and a sandwich."

Rose shook her head disapprovingly. "Is that all you have had today?"

"...yes?"

"And if I am to assume that you had nothing to eat yesterday that would be correct, would it not?"

He looked away. "It... was for Dave."

"How so?" Rose pressed.

"If he isn't healthy, or well fed, CPS will take him away..." He ran a hand though his hair in frustration, feeling helpless.

"And what about you? You not being healthy and possibly becoming too sick to be able to recover is helping him?" She said, her voice cold and emotionless aside from a sting to its edge.

His sigh was shaky, and he was glad that his shades hid his eyes. He didn't know what to say, or even if he did Rose would listen.

Karkat huddled himself into a ball. He remembered when... he was taken... From...- He sobbed a little in his ball, quietly.

"Roxy can you please look after Karkat for a while?" Rose suggested, taking a small step towards Dirk, using one hand to herd him away from the troll and her sister to speak. "If something else is bothering you, you know you can speak to me about it." She said softly.

Roxy nodded again after Rose spoke to her and turned back to Karkat, touching his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him.

Karkat jumped unintentionally at her touch before looking up at her, tear stained on his cheek "...Oh, I didn't mean to jump..." Shit, he wasn't paying attention and missed this human’s name. "What... are you called?" His voice was very hesitant.

"The name’s Roxy." The drunken teen smiled a bit.

"Roxy…" He smiled a little back as he looked into her eyes.

"Roxy... how... long has this... thing been going on with the humans?" He asked curiously, treading lightly around the landmines.

"What do you mean?" she looked a little confused as she hadn't completely grasped the situation yet.

"The male humans’... relationship-" He heard Dirk yelling and silenced his voice. Karkat didn’t think Dirk was able to yell. At all.

"T...h…anks for... the bandages…" He managed to say to Roxy, before ducking his head away a little.

"Shh, shh," She put a hand on the top of his head, closing her eyes with an obviously fake straight expression on her face, she was trying to hard act the right way.

He didn't flinch at her touch this time; in fact, he leaned into it a little. As long as she didn't touch his horns, it didn't matter.

She accidentally brushed a finger over one of his horns.

He snarled a little. He still was leaning into the touch, but once she was not touching a horn, he began to purr a little.

The drunken teen giggled slightly and petted his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> turntechGodhead [] is now tipsyGnostalgic [].  
> tipsyGnostalgic [] is now turntechGodhead [].  
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> apocalypseArisen [AA] is now tipsyGnostalgic [].  
> tentacleTherapist [] is now turntechGodhead [].  
> turntechGodhead [] is now tentacleTherapist [].  
> tentacleTherapist [] is now turntechGodhead [].  
> turntechGodhead [] is now tentacleTherapist [].  
> tentacleTherapist [] is now timaeusTestified [].  
> turntechGodhead [] is now tentacleTherapist [].  
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> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "CHARACTER SWAPS FTW! ~ Ash".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "Yes indeed ~ Bec".


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I mention that this is a shippy Fic? No? Well now you know...  
> (So sorry for not updating. I've literally been studying for the past three days non-stop)

"There's nothing else to say. I'm just doing what I can to keep Dave with me. I don't know how bad I'd go if he wasn't here..."

"You do know that Dave has mentioned to tie you up and spoon feed you to both me as well as to John and Jade?" Rose said. "Besides, if anything goes wrong, Dave will most likely be sent to live with us and you will be able to visit him regularly if not be able to move in with Roxy and I to help care for him."

"I DON'T NEED TO BE CARED FOR!"

Rose ignored Dave's comment.

"If I'm seen as a bad guardian, do you really think they'd let me see him?" He slammed his fist into the wall, normally being able to at least crack the wall a little, but probably just managed to badly bruise his hand.

"Dirk." Rose calmly placed a hand on his shoulder, holding it firmly but not too tightly like she wasn't going to let him go. "You're not a bad guardian, Dave still looks up to you, but he also tries to care for you if you don't care for yourself. You are still brothers, nothing will change that."

"I'm supposed to be able to care for him. Not be cared for." He shrugged off her hand, looking down. He felt sick with himself, why was he like this? Why couldn't he just... Be healthy...

"Then you need to make yourself stronger, not appear weak or he will take pity on you and try to care for you instead of vice versa." Rose explained, hand falling silently to her side. "Making yourself weak is doing the opposite of what you want."

"I didn't mean to go this far!" He turned and shouted to her, he was shouting now, not caring if Dave heard his weakness. "I didn't mean to become an anorexic piece of shit that can't even care for his brother!" He sighed angrily, hot tears stinging his eyes.

Rose didn't even flinch; she simply moved her hands up quickly, placing them on either side of dirk's face, holding him head on with her. His face was hot beneath her cool hands, only increasing her internal worry. "It's never too late to turn back, it's never too late to return to what you once were. You just need to be persistent." She pressed her fingers in slightly to get her point, careful of her nails. "If nothing changes soon Roxy and I will return, non-intoxicated hopefully."

Dirk closed his eyes, letting Rose's voice wash over him. "It's not that easy. I-I'm trying. But my body doesn't want to eat, and Dave gets sad. If I force myself to eat more, I throw it up and lose hard work..." He wasn't trying to hide the frustration and barely contained waver in his voice.

Rose watched the anger slowly drain out of him and loosened her grip, holding his face in one hand and stroking the hair away from his face with the other. "That is understandable. But you still have to eat to when you think you can't eat any more. Continue with that method and you should be able to rebuild your eating abilities. Understood?"

"Yea...h... I'm sorry... For making you worry... and needing taking care of... I should apologize and come clean to Dave..." He pulled back, lifting his shades to stare Rose in the eyes, his watery eyes be damned.

Rose gave him a small, sympathetic smile, resting her hands together before herself. "That would be best, and do so quickly, Dave doesn't appear to be in that much of a good mood when he is not too pleased with your actions. I will wait here."

"Okay..." He walked away towards Dave's room, knocking nervously. "Dave... I need to talk to you..."

Rose sat down on a couch nearby, watching Roxy's and Karkat's interactions curiously but not interfering.

"The door's unlocked." Dave stated, not moving himself from his turntables as he continued to mix some of his tracks together.

He slowly opened the door, looking around Dave's room before sitting on his bed. "Com'ere..."

Dave lifted his head to look at Dirk, thinking it over before removing the headphones from his neck and placing them on the deck after powering off, the room back in silence as he walked over, sitting beside his brother but giving him some space at least.

He sighed awkwardly. "First of all, I'm sorry Dave. I'm trying to eat, really... It's just hard..."

Dave nodded, listening even though he wasn't looking at Dirk. "I know... but I still worry sometimes..."

"I... I know... But, I did it for you... If you weren't fed well- I... You'd be taken away from me." He looked away from Dave, squeezing his eyes shut.

"I know but I think I have enough food, you still need to eat you know. You can't go forever only eating a crumb a day..."

"I tried... My body is resisting me." Dirk felt his body shudder. "I wish I could just be healthy, not... be... ano-anorexic... Shit, I'm such a sick fuck." He felt a single tear spill, it seemed finally admitting to Dave that he might be anorexic broke the dam... He showed the physical signs even if he hadn't been officially diagnosed

Dave looked at Dirk this time, worried and still a bit upset, the anger all faded away now. "Hey, it's... its okay. You'll get better." He turned sideways, sliding over to Dirk and pulling him into his arms, embracing him lightly but comfortingly.

"How do you know?" Dirk felt helpless, hopeless. His body shuddered with unshed tears, or maybe it was lack of food. He didn't know, he needed- needed. What did he need...?

"I'll help you, okay? I'll help you. Just tell me what to do and I'll try my hardest..."

He clung to Dave desperately; he needed the contact, the physical contact that showed that he was loved. "Just-just.... lo-love me... I did this for you, I-I can get over it for you."

Dave nodded, stroking one hand through Dirk's hair. He didn't see any reason to not show Dirk how much he loved him. This would be a reason good enough for Dave to break his facade, not that it hasn't already been broken.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry I got anorexic... Shit, I should go to the hospital and get officially diagnosed- or just be driven there to be put under watch." His hunger was making him ramble, as he rested his head against Dave, feeling lightheaded.

"Sshhhhhhhhhhhhh..... its fine, its fine....... do you want to go eat something now?" Dave offered. Even if it was in the middle of the night Dave didn't mind making some food if it was for Dirk's health.

"I think, I think- ugggh" He was hit by a dizzy spell, falling backwards in a confused haze. He dimly felt his eyelids flutter, everything else was completely blocked out. Dave wasn't entirely conscious of the fact that Dirk wasn't conscious for a moment, thinking he had only fallen asleep against his shoulder. He didn't move his brother away though, choosing to keep hold of him instead.

He shook his head, slowly coming back to his senses. "Nngh..." He didn't know the exact time he'd had the spell, but he doubted it was long...

Karkat thought about several things while he was being petted, before the female humans left his company. He didn't feel like it was worth listing them down, but he allowed himself to submerge into thought. As far as he knew, these humans, the male ones Dave and... Dirt? No wait Dirk; yeah Dirk, has their own plates full. He actually kind of felt sorry for them, considering the fact that they went out of their way in helping him when he needed it the most. Karkat thought that Dave was scared of losing him, him referring to his older sibling, while Dirk was afraid of him being taken by the ... CPS, whatever that was. The CPS was probably the equivalent to the Condesce, the head mistress of the tribe, selecting children to take away from one tribe and to use as war soldiers. Karkat sighed as he tossed away that thought almost immediately after the Condesce's name was brought up, he was in no mood to be thinking of that Batterbitch. Instead he curled himself up on the couch, tossing the blanket over himself and aimed to get himself warm again, while being able to hear the muffled voices of the humans, who were probably in Dave's chamber by the sounds of things.

His thoughts went to a different medium within a few, life long minutes. The humans had the same blood colour as he did. He noticed this with the females as well, especially the Rose human, with his sickle at her throat- He coughed horrendously, blood particles spilling out all over the floor. Gog, he was suck a mess, at least the cough shook him awake more. He was slightly hungry as well, but he didn't think about complaining. The humans needed to sort themselves out first, he was the intrusion here.

Karkat was fucking sure it has been an hour since the females left. He was, to his credit, slightly con- no he was not that. Alright worri- well okay… Maybe a little of that. He got up off the lounge and hopped over to the door frame, catching his breath as he lent against it for a few seconds before hopping over to one of the Kitchen chairs, catching his breath again and finally going over to where Dave's chamber was, pressing an ear against it and holding the doorframe for support.

When Dave felt and heard signs of awakening he moved Dirk back a bit, choosing to kean him against he wall beside the bed, looking him over curiously. "Hey, you 'kay?" He asked slowly. "Do you need something to eat now?" He still wanted Dirk to eat as much as he could before he fell asleep. Speaking of sleeping, Dave was still a bit tired. It was... what? In the early hours of the morning? Dave quickly checked his phone sitting on the mattress. Sure enough it was around two thirty in the morning. Shit, Dave needed to get Dirk and himself to sleep. Insomnia on top of anorexia was not a good combination to behold. Nope.

Dirk held a hand to his head "I... had a fainting spell, I got really dizzy..." He rested against the wall, shutting his eyes and trying to steady his head.

He could hear Dirk's voice, and what he had said. Boy, the human must be in severe trouble to have dizzy spells. He moved away from the door and hopped over to the table, sitting on the chair and trying his hardest not to cry again from the pain he was in, and the thoughts in his head.

"I'll... grab the soup. Want it heated up?" Dave stood up, leaning towards the door, but waiting for Dirk's response.

“That- would be good..." Dirk rolled his head to the side a little, gazing at Dave lazily. He felt like he had no energy...

He pinched at himself to keep himself awake, doing his best not to faint, or get a dizzy spell, again. He shifted his legs, moving to jolt his mind back into wakefulness.

"Try to stay conscious, you can sleep after you eat a little more." Dave moved out of his room and into the kitchen, pulling the bowl out of the fridge and putting it into the microwave. "Hey Karkat!" He called. "You want something to eat?" He didn't know where Karkat was and couldn't see him from where he was standing.

Karkat puts his arms on the table and rests his head on them, his eyes drooping a little. Karkat nods in reply, shifting in his seat a little. He found it a little odd that Dave called him by his first name and greeted him at the same time, but shrugged it off.

Dave glanced over to the table and saw his bowl of noodles wasn't even half eaten. He walked over and picked them up along with Karkat's also not finished bowl. He tipped the two bowls into one, dumping the empty one on the bench to deal with later while replacing the soup in the microwave with the noodles to heat them up.

"...Where's Dirk?" He asked Dave as he lifted his head off his arms and looked at where Dave was, preparing food.

"In my room, he's a bit dizzy and tired but I'm making him eat something before he falls asleep." Dave states, taking the now heated noodles out and passing them to Karkat. "Why? You want to ask him something?"

He shakes his head at Dave's question as he uses his long, red tongue to suck a noodle into his mouth. "... He w… as not… here. That’s… all."

Dirk tapped his fingers in an anonymous beat, trying to keep his mind stimulated and alert. He glanced about the room, checking out all the corners to keep himself awake.

"Dave... Hurry up..." He rubbed at his head.

Dave nods to Karkat before carrying the soup with a spoon back to his room, shuffling over and sitting on his bed, bowl held out to Dirk. "Here."

His hand reached out the grab the bowl, hand shaking slightly as he brought it towards himself. "Thanks..." He picked up the spook with his shaky hand, soup threatening to tip out as he lifted the spoon. Fuck, fainting must have taken a lot of his energy...

"Do I seriously need to spoon feed you?" Dave teased, but he was still a bit worried for Dirk, remaining close by in case he actually did need to help.

He looked at Dave, trying to look annoyed, more like his old self, but felt he looked more weak and helpless. "Dave... uhm... He...lp?"

Karkat watches Dave leave, curiously wanting to go into where they were, in Dave's room, but doesn't follow. Instead, he started to lick the flavouring off the noodles.

He tried again to lift the spoon, hand still shaking. Why couldn't he do anything? He was so weak now...

Dave worried at his bottom lip with his teeth for a moment before taking the spook from Dirk's hands, scooping up the soup himself and holding the spoon to Dirk's mouth. "I suppose I do..."

It didn't take him long to lick all the flavouring off the noodles, he even ate some, but his stomach was too small to have this whole bowl of noodles, so he puts them to one side and gets up again, hopping over to the door of Dave's room, which was open, and saw Dirk and Dave. Karkat could just imagine himself walking over to Dirk, trying to help him with his food, but he quickly shook the thought from his head. Why the fuck would he help the human? He watched Dave feed his ... friend? What were they anyway?

'You have got to stop having these vision Karkat' He thought as he approached the two, trying this again.

Dirk leaned forward opening his mouth to take the metal utensil into his mouth. He waited for it to tip back before swallowing.

Dave made sure to be slow with his movements so as not to spill the soup or give Dirk more than was necessary. "Tell me when you can't have anymore." He said slowly. He didn't even notice Karkat getting closer.

He nodded weakly, swirling the soup around in his mouth before swallowing and waiting for the next spoonful.

He takes it upon himself to literally fall onto the ground, next to the two humans. "How... are you…?"

Dave jumped slightly at the sound of Karkat's voice, but managed not to spill any of the soup as he turned to look down at Karkat from the bed. "He just needs to eat more, that's all..." Dave said, lying a bit; Dirk needed more than just food, he needed attention to keep on track.

He nodded with Dave, knowing what he was concealing. "I'll be back to annoying the shit out of you soon."

Dave rolled his eyes with his head. "Sure, sure. Of course."

Karkat shooks his head. "Here this might help..." He pulls out several, star shaped leaves and lifts up Dirk's top and places the leaves onto his stomach. "Just leave them there for several minutes... They'll help digestion."

Dave watched curiously, wondering exactly what the leaves were and where he might be able to find more; no one had found anything with those properties yet. Maybe only trolls could find them or grow them? He shrugged internally and sat close by, offering another spoon of soup to Dirk.

The ‘patient’ blinked. "Thanks... I mean it, Karkat." He opened his mouth to the next spoonful of soup, it seemed being fed (even though it was embarrassingly pathetic) instead of eating himself was helping to keep it down...

Karkat looked at Dirk, confused by the gratitude. He didn't reply, instead he curled up a little, holding the leaves in place as well.

Dave didn't mind Karkat's help, was even a bit thankful for it as he continued to spoon-feed Dirk, waiting until he couldn't eat any more. He wouldn't question when he told him to stop though.

"Mmmn" His stomach felt... pleasantly full, instead of the gut wrenching sick it usually did. Even so, he was starting to feel a little _too_ full after a few more bites. He carefully placed a hand on Dave's "No more..."

Dave nodded, putting the spoon back into the bowl and taking it out to the kitchen, dumping it on the bench before returning to Dirk and Karkat, sitting back on the bed where he was previously.

Karkat pulled the leaves off, to see them being red; they were green when they were first put on. "Shit..." he muttered to himself as he tossed them to the side and pulled out another set. He had a whole bag full, for himself while on the run, but the captchalogue system that the spirits gave him sure helped a fucking lot. "I have never, in all my sweeps, have seen leaves go this red so fucking fast…"

"What... does that mean?"

Dave just sat there listening, interested.

He pushes away Dirk's loose bangs of hair away from his face and puts his hand on it, his other one pushing against the leaves on his stomach. "Your body is taking in the nutrients of the leaves at an astounding rate. One leaf is kind of like one slice of a red fruit, if it was cut in quarters." He sighs and pulls his hand away from his forehead.

Dave wants to help too but doesn't know what to do...

"Oh..." He just let Karkat do what he wanted, he trusted Dave to stop the troll from going too far. He leaned back. "Not that I'm not grateful... but why use these on me...?"

Karkat shakes his head for a second, as he grasp one of Dirk's hands and guides it to his stomach, allowing the lifeless like limb to hold the leaves in place. He then pulls out a slab of thin bark, with lots of tree wax on it. He then coats a few of the leaves with the substance before sticking it to Dirk's forehead. "You have... humans that... care." Was his only reply to Dirk's question, sticking a leaf on the man's neck for good measure as well, before making everything disappear into his sylladex.

"Of course I care for him. Why wouldn't I...?" Dave was a bit confused, but keep watching Karkat oddly as he helped in what must have been a way with trolls.

He made a slight face ad the sensation of having leaves on his face, but knew it was for his own good. He looked over to Dave, silently promising that if he was laughing he would kick his ass once better.

Dave wasn't laughing; he was a bit too worried right now...

He pulls away once he was done. "There..." He topples over onto his backside, bumping his knee and winces in pain a little.

He looked at him in a bit of concern. "Are you alright? Need some fresh bandages?"

Dave is not sure what to do...

"No... I am f...in…e." He lays back onto the ground.

Dave grumbles lightly but reaches down, hooking his arms underneath Karkat's and dragging him up onto the bed.

"Are you sure? It's only fair to try and help you after you've helped me..." He moved forward to help Dave with Karkat, but found that Dave had already gotten him on the bed.

"Everyone's on the bed now, everyone loves the bed, go the fuck to sleep now." Dave shuffled to the head of the bed, resting against the board behind him, finding it uncomfortable so he pulled a pillow up behind himself.

He smiles a little as he is pulled onto the bed, pulling himself so his face can see Dirk. "You... needed it..." His eyes flickered away.

"There's nothing wrong with showing some compassion..." He placed a hand on the troll's shoulder. "We're gonna help you."

"C....compassion..?" Karkat shifts a little at Dirk's touch, it was friendly like Roxy's touch

Dirk smiled, feeling oddly happy that Karkat was beginning to trust him.

"You have got to know what compassion means, seriously."

"..." Karkat shook his head.

"Basically you take pity on someone and help them out for free." Dave explained. "Like if you were in their position you would appreciate it when a stranger helps you out at the weakest point in your life for no reason but that they wanted to help you get better."

"Oh..." He puts his clawed hand on top of Dirk's, pushing it off his shoulder, but holding it in his hand instead, laying down on the bed as well. "... Call this the first compassion thing ever…"

He looked at the joined hands, giving Karkat's a light squeeze. "No need to be embarrassed"

"Sweet." Dave let out a small yawn, crossing his arms over his stomach and lifting one knee into the air, leaning it against the wall. Eyes closed behind his shades, planning to sleep in them as of now.

"I... Don't kn…ow how to feel... right now." The mutant troll confessed, sighing in the process.

"Waddayamean?" Dave slurred, drowsiness suddenly taking over.

He held the hand lightly, looking at Dave. "We've been asking you a heap of questions... Any you wanna ask us?"

"... Age?" His voice was croaky, but clearly heard.

"I'm sixteen." Dave states, shuffling a bit to get comfortable.

He smiled. "I'm seventeen, and Dave, it's rude to wear shades around guests.

"But it's my shades bro!"

Karkat smirks at that and pulls Dirk's shades off his face, hiding them from view.

"Off, Dave" He reached for them, preparing to snatch them away.

Dave pulled his face away, trying to avoid Dirk's hands. "But it's not fucking fair!"

Karkat lays there, watching the two fight over the eye goggles. His eyelids drooping a little as he shivers.

"Kar has mine, so take 'em off!" He lunged forwards, trying to get a grip on the elusive shades.

"Kar..?" the troll’s voice was dazed, and tired sounding.

Dave scrunches his face up as his shades are removed before glowering at Dirk with his scarlet eyes. "There, are you happy now?"

"Very" he turned to Karkat "I can't be fucked saying 'Karkat' all the time so I shortened it. Any other questions you wanna ask?"

Karkat looked up at Dave's eyes, immediately loosing himself in them. He laid there, petrified.

Dave blinked at Karkat, confused. "What? My eyes are just as fucked up as yours are. Or is there something wrong now that you aren’t unique any more?"

Taken back, he moves away from Dave. "Y...ou would have... been ... been culled... if you... were.. a ..troll"

"Even in human society having these eyes would make you a freak and cause others to scream and run away from you even if you aren't put in a circus first."

He frowned "No one's getting that here." He moved to place Karkat's head in his lap and pressed Dave's head against his shoulder. His nurturing nature was back damn it...

"Nrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…" Dave can't be stuffed saying any words and just hung there limply.

He hesitates before moving closer- scratch that, Dirk pulled him onto his lap, Karkat freaked out a little at the touch and fell off the bed, injuring his knee in the process. "Fuck!" He cried out as he hissed, clutching to his knee.

Dave turned to look at Karkat, sighing before pulling him back onto the bed, giving him to Dirk before walking out to grab the first aid kit before returning. "You gotta learn to trust us if you want to heal you know..."

He snarled horrible at Dave "The last fucking time I trusted someone I was chased by a fucking mob in the first place." He hissed as he moved himself around on the bed. "And being shot by an arrow was the beginning of it..."

He shook his head, and started to run his fingers through Karkat's hair in what he hoped was a comforting manner. He was careful not to touch the horns though, he didn't want to ruin his hard work in getting Karkat to like him.

Dave threw his hands into the air and dropped the kit beside Dirk, crawling back to the head of the bed, away from the other two and pulling the covers over himself. "I'm not dealing with this when it's in the early hours of the morning. Goodnight or get out."

The troll gazed at Dave and nodded, calming down at Dirk's touch. Hesitating, he moved closer to Dirk, eyeing him as he seeked out his warmth.

He smiled to let Karkat know it was ok to come closer if he wanted to. He shifted so he was lying down between Dave and Karkat, looking at the troll. "Anything else you... wanna ask?"

Dave hid his head in the sheets so that only the top of his hair could be seen.

He shook his head before pulling the leaves off Dirk a second time. They were nearly wilted. Well, he can't use them again. Oh well. Karkat looked at Dirk's smile and moved closer to the man, still a little hesitant. "C-can... I…?"

"Can you what?" He was curious about the troll, he was so different to what trolls were said to be, gentle instead of violent. And rather... attractive rather than the ugly, drooling beasts that trolls were said to be. Of course, Dirk was just calling him attractive compared to the stereotypical depiction of trolls, he definitely wasn't finding him attractive on a personal level (he was).

Dave's eyes were still open under the covers, ears listening to Dirk's and Karkat's conversation curiously while he lay still, trying to fool the two into thinking he was asleep.

"Can I... snug…g…l…e?" Karkat whispered, a little embarrassed in asking. This was a completely different and new experience for him, and he wanted to make the most of it while it was going to last. It was a shame that in the near future… He would need to depart the humans company

"What, why do you need to ask? Just do it." He opened his arms for the troll, waiting for Karkat to move closer.

"Because..." He crawls into Dirk's arms slowly, because he is very limited in the idea of movement. "It is... polite to?" That was a lie; he knew it and Dirk probably did too. He was... just not used to being touched other than being a punching bag in a fight.

He couldn't resist snuggling his face into Karkat's hair, it was so poofy! He still watched out for the horns though. "I seriously don't mind. It's nice to be hugged... Dave grew out of the huggy-show your bro love stage a while ago and I kinda miss it."

"... Hugged..." So, this was a 'hugged'. He could feel how underweight Dirk actually was, but if those leaves worked their magic, his stomach would be almost three times its size by morning, with the use of nutritional molecules from the leaf, sinking into the bloodstream, turning into healthy salts and going through his kidneys before turning into a liquidized gunk in his stomach, which will expand gradually over a few hours.

Dave shifted only slightly, kneels pulled up to his chest to keep himself warm as he let out a very faint sigh, finally closing his eyes and actually trying to fall asleep.

He felt... happy lying between Dave and Karkat. He was getting the satisfaction of cuddles and being near his brother. He closed his eyes, the dizziness having faded to fatigue. "Hmmm, you don't have'ta stay here to sleep if ya' don't wanna..."

"I... have never... 'hugged' before." Being a mutant meant hiding all the time. Like the Severus Snape to your James Potter and the Marauders. You hid, comforted yourself, hunted for yourself and you live your life knowing that you will die, that was what a mutant was for Karkat. And he just wished the humans weren't killed in the process... Because, not admitting out loud, he wanted to protect them... Because, they are blood brothers.

Dirk had the feeling Dave had been listening in, even when 'sleeping'. He didn't really care; he was tired and was actually going to rest. So he closed his eyes and relaxed around Karkat.

When Dave felt Dirk's body relaxing he carefully lifted his head up, glancing at his brother's peaceful face curiously before looking to Karkat, trying to decide what to feel about this situation.

He see's Dave's eyes locked onto his own and the troll moves an arm, closer to Dave, as if he wants the younger human to hold it.

Dave curiously reached his hand out from under the blankets, using his thumb to hold Karkat's fingers to his hand and letting his own fingers explore, he was curious right now and he wanted to satisfy his curiosity, looking the troll's hand over. It wasn't that different from a human's hand, he decided, and soon held Karkat's hand properly in his, looking back at the troll's slightly illuminated eyes.

Karkat smiled at Dave, tightening his cold to touch hand around Dave's. The troll knew he wasn't asleep either, his heightened senses picked up on that part.

"You not tired?" Dave asked quietly, talking normally didn't seem appropriate and Dave proffered to be quiet when Dirk was resting.

"..No. You aren’t tired either?" He replied equally quiet for the same reason. Dirk needed all of the rest he was getting

"Not right now, I don't need that much sleep. Dirk's gonna worry if he finds out about that though so don't tell him." Dave looked to Dirk's face again, shoulders and body relaxing.

Karkat nods as he uses Dirk's chest as a pillow, snuggling onto it. "... Are you two... Moirails or Matesprits?" He whispered, confused about Dirk and Dave's relationship.

Dave blinked, confused about what Karkat just said. "What? Morals? Mastpits? What?" He tilted his head, trying to convey how confused he was if his words didn't work.

Karkat notices his confusion and sighs. "Moirails is a relationship of guardianship between two individuals, where Matesprits are two individuals who love each other. The only difference between the two of them really is that Matesprits are able to..." He yawns unintentionally, he wasn’t tired as much, but it was random that he would yawn like that. "…to reproduce legally." He smirks a little, happy with his description of the two red quadrants. "A tribe thing."

"Uhhhhhhhhhh..." Dave didn't get it. "I'm his brother. It means we had the same mother and father. You know? Two people fuck and they reproduce two young and those two young would be siblings. Two girls are sisters to each other, two boys are brothers to each other and a girl is the sister of a boy while a boy is a brother of a girl. It's a kind of bond like 'hey, I love you and I don't want anything bad to happen to you and I'll do anything I can but I don't want to fuck you' kind of thing. You get it?"

His eyebrows raise a bit as he looked at Dave, then to Dirk, and back to Dave, his cheeks blushing. "O...oh. Sorry, I.. Didn't know that."

"I suppose you don't have brothers and sisters or mothers and fathers then?" Dave asked, he shuffled himself so that he was leaning on one hand to look at Karkat properly over the top of Dirk.

He shook his head. "I was lucky to even be born. I was born, and my Lusus...'s looked after me. But barely. They didn't know I was a mutant. I hid everything for so long... I don't know what a brother, sister, mother or a father is, or what they are meant to do." He loosened his grip on Dave's hand a little. "That...s why I helped Dirk.."

Dave nodded; it's understandable, even from Dave's perspective. "They're part of a family. A family looks after and cares for each other, loves each other. You poor underprivileged troll..." Dave reached a hand over, rubbing it through Karkat's hair carelessly but trying to be reassuring.

As Dave began to caress his fingers through Karkat's hair, he leaned into the touch and silently began to purr. "Your... hand is.. warm."

He shifted, not really awake, but feeling Dave and Karkat moving, so he moved to accommodate them, sighing in his sleep softly.

Dave chuckled lightly, a little more so when he heard Karkat's purring. "What's that noise?" He didn't stop petting Karkat's head anyways, not even when Dirk moved slightly.

He began to purr a little louder, to answer Dave's question. He then grabbed Dirk's arm and put it over his own back, covering themselves in the blanket as well. He rested again on the older man's chest, and resumed purring.

Dave eventually calmed down, now using his nails to scratch through Karkat's hair along the grain like you would do to a dog or cat even. "You sound like a cat..." Dave informed the troll, with a small smile, enjoying the comfortable near silence bar Karkat's purring.

"It is in my fucking name isn't it?" He sarcastically replied as he nuzzled into Dirk a little, his hand clasped with Dave's loosening a little as his eyes droop down a little.

Dave nodded and chuckled a bit again before returning to silence, enjoying the comforting feeling of being this close to someone else. It's been a long time since he's felt this safe and it feels nice...

"...Night" Karkat muttered as he yawned, before going to sleep on Dirk's chest, snuggling into the crook of his neck.

"G'night." Dave replied before curling up again, fingers loosely hooked with Karkat's over the top of Dirk as he curled his head against his brother's sides, trying to forget about his worries for long enough to fall asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> Karkat: (( FUCK  
> Dave: (( ?  
> Karkat: (( ASDFHJKL I JUST DAMN IT  
> Karkat: (( Ash I thought you were afk on FIWTAFU  
> Dave: (( LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL  
> Dave: (( did you even check skype?  
> Karkat: (( No.  
> AA: ((wait what  
> Dave: (( *screeches* now what?  
> Karkat: (( My phone is lost in my pillow fort  
> Dave: (( XD  
> Karkat: (( Shoosh  
> Dirk: (( hehehe  
> Dirk: (( So, Dave/Dirk or Karkat/Dirk moment? XD  
> Dave: (( hmmmmmm  
> Karkat: (( Nope, it was all an illusion  
> Dave: (( bec decided for us  
> Dave: (( lol  
> Dave: (( woops!  
> AA: ((. . .
> 
>  
> 
> Ash: im just waiting for when Karkat goes like 'what are you two? moirails? arent you cheating by letting me help you?' XD  
> Gem: hahahaha  
> Bec: xD  
> Bec: I was thinking about that  
> Ash: lols  
> Bec: That is why he is in there, to get answers  
> Gem: XD  
> Ash: heuheuheu  
> Bec: Tribal Kat is Tribal  
> Ash: lol!  
> Ash: i thought that said punching but it was a mispell of pushing XP  
> Bec: XD  
> Ash: 'stop the troll from going too far.' i got the wrong idea...  
> Gem: Hahahaha  
> Ash: XD  
> Bec: Wrong chat mate ; )  
> Ash: ahahahahah  
> Gem: heehehehe  
> Ash: *wink*  
> Bec: *wonk*  
> Gem: *honk*  
> Ash: *honl*  
> Bec: lol wut?  
> Ash: mwahahahaha  
> Gem: pfffft


	10. Chapter 10

When Dirk awoke he stretched, and sat up. Or tried to. He was sandwiched between his brother and Karkat, and couldn't completely remember why or how he'd gotten there.

Dave shifted only slightly, hand still partially joined to Karkat's, even in his sleep the two appendages hadn't unhooked from each other.

Dirk eyed the two on either side of him, wondering why the three of them were in Dave's bed and why his stomach was suddenly larger than it was last night. His sleepy brain said he could be pregnant, he shut it up. A natural baby bump wouldn’t show up for weeks even if he _could_ conceive a child. "Let me up before I make you both pay for child support." Ok, brain-to-mouth filter wasn't online yet, good to know.

The troll began to stir a little, not knowing what time it was. He began to open his eyes, noticing the warmth next to him. He yawns and began to shift a little.

He doubted they were awake enough to hear him.

Dave grumbled and rolled over to face the other way, still trying to get some more rest.

"... fuck my nooks itchy.." Karkat breathed out as he scratched it a little with his free hand before he began to scratch his head.

Dirk made a face as he sat up, stretched ad moved away from the two.

"..." Dave raised an eyebrow before rolling over and lifting his upper half up further on the bed to look behind Dirk to Karkat. "Your head is your nook?" He asked, still tired.

"Fuck, keep it down, I'm scratching..." Karkat unintentionally replied

"Ok, what freaky magic did you use to actually make me look halfway healthy?"

Dave looked at Dirk. "Sleep and food. Oh and some weird herb magic thingy Karkat did."

"Should I be concerned about these 'weird magic herbs'?"

Karkat sat up and looked at the two of them. "Gog, I can't have a fucking sleep in, huh." His hair was dishevelled and he was a lot more refreshed from sleep, his bags underneath his eyes almost not even there.

"Nope..." Dave grumbled before pulling the sheet over his head and sliding back under the covers.

"How's your stomach feelin', Dirk?" Dave asked, voice still slurred slightly.

"Pretty good, why?"

Karkat notices that his hand is still clenched with Dave's, tugging on it a little.

"Just checking. Karkat said it would be bigger. Does it feel bigger?"

"Yeas...? Anyway, I'm going to go have a shower, I'll be out later." He got up- "Haha, Karks, now's the time you reveal that those leaves secretly impregnated him..." Dave whispered before Dirk left the room -and walked to his room to grab some fresher clothes and locked himself in the bathroom. He was pretty sure that Dave would be pissy He was using all the hot water but he didn't care right now.

Karkat choked on his spit, coughing all over the place, spitting a bit if blood around from his mouth as well. "Fuck Dave, warn me next time, Gog."

"What?" Dave chuckled, peering out from under the sheets, smiling cheekily.

"I just choked from that comment you fuck" Even while the troll was saying this, he had a visible grin on his face, and a little bit of blood trickling down his chin.

"You thought it was funny! Don't deny it!" Dave grinned sliding a hand under a pillow and shoving it at Karkat's face with a chuckling noise as he pulled himself up to sitting, blanket around his waist and legs underneath it.

"No I am thinking it is a little early to be thinking of that isn't it?" Karkat could deny it all until the cows came home, but he failed horribly. Instead, he got a pillow and started batting Dave with it.

"Hey!" Dave couldn't even try to dodge the first few hits before he grabbed the other pillow, using it as a shield for a while before swinging it at Karkat's head a couple of times. "So that means you are thinking about it! Just thinking it's too early right now!" He teased the troll.

He smirks a little before pouncing on top of Dave, belting him with the pillow while ripping the Pillow Dave had away from him. "I am not THINKING ABOUT IT AT ALL. IT IS ABSURD IF ANYTHING." He thought about it for a second before his eyes widened. "NO DAVE NO, NO, NO. NOPE I AM NOT GETTING YOUR BROTHER NO. NO."

Dave couldn't help it; he burst into laughter, not caring if Karkat had the upper hand. "Oh my god you- This is just pricele-e-ess! Ahahahahaha!" Dave closed his eyes tightly, trying to regain his breath after laughing too hard.

He dried his hair off; all the while he could hear Dave's laughter. What did he miss? He frowned as he placed the towel on his shoulders, damp hair dripping onto his clothes as he walked back to Dave's room. "What is going on here?"

"YOU ARE A FUCKING NOOKSUCKING COCKFUCK DAVE! FUCK YOU" He didn't know if he was embarrassed, happy or angry. It was only then he noticed Dirk at the door. "DAVE IS SUGGESTING THAT I IMPREGNATIED YOU WITH LEAVES."

Dave rolled onto his side, still laughing as he looked at Dirk. "Karkat got you prego bro, ahahahaaa! You got prego!" He continued to laugh, almost sounding like a hyena with its intensity.

"NO I FUCKING DID NOT!"

He felt his face immediately go poker. "Sure, like it would take _one_ night to do that Dave."

"Ahahaahhaha yes! Yes! Ahahahaha! It only does take one night to get someone pregnant!" The troll snarls at Dave before getting off him and curling up, underneath the blankets, embarrassed. "Karkat, you tsundere!" Dave teases, sitting up, shoulders still shaking with silent laughter.

"Not for the bump to show, idiot. I can't get pregnant anyway." He rolled his eyes at Dave, sighing.

"Who knows? Trolls aren't human. Think about that."

Karkat is quiet, in a ball of his own misery, secretly flipping Dave off

"Dave, as much as I'm sure it breaks your heart,I'm 99% sure I'm not pregnant."

"1% is still a chance!"

"The other 1% is fuck you I'm not pregnant."

"Hang on, Karkat, do you know what tsundere is?" Dave pokes the lump under the blankets. Karkat carefully slips out of the bed and hops away, using the bed as a walking stick of sorts "Hey Karks. Karks. Answer me."

"Leave him alone, Dave, you've insulted his culture enough."

"I don't insult, I tease." Dave said defensively.

"Don't call me Karks"

"Kitkat then."

"NO." The troll hops towards Dirk, before stopping before him, balancing on his only foot.

"What about Kar?" He stayed out of the troll's way. Dave was being a shit, so he could deal with the angry troll.

"Crabbycat."

"Just drop it." He replied before hopping out of the bedroom.

"Cya later Karkles!"Karkat flinched at that nickname, as a small tear wandered out of his eye. Only his backstabbing friend called him that...

"Dave stop being a dick, I know I'm out of danger now but that doesn't mean you have to be a prick to the one that helped me." 

"I'm joking; don't take me seriously, sheesh."

"Kar obviously does. You ever think maybe he got called names back where he came from and that you could be reminding him about it?"

He sighed and sat beside Dave before resting his slightly damp head on his brother's shoulder. "I'm sorry for snapping at you..."

"..." Dave nodded to Dirk before he looked at Karkat, no longer smiling. "Hey Karkat. Did you have friends back at your home place before… yeah did you have friends at home?" He nodded, not turning around to show him weakness. "Wanna tell us about them?"

"... The only troll... I trusted. Called me Karkles..." He visibly flinches as the memory of Terezi's betrayal flooded his brain for a few split seconds.

"Tell us about them then?" Dave asked. "You don't have to if you don't want to..."

Karkat finally turned hopped around, however his good foot slipped and he landed on the ground, pathetically. "Fucking hell." The older Strider made to dart forward, but forgot he was leaning on Dave, sending himself sprawling to the ground as well.

Dave let out a loud sigh, hooking an arm under one of Dirk's and one of Karkat's, lifting them both up. "What am I supposed to do with you two...?" He thought aloud.

"Impregnate us?" He snarled as he was assisted to his feet again.

"Human males can't get pregnant." Dirk nodded thanks to Dave as he sat back on the bed.

Dave simply groaned. "Dirk, I'm stealing your room since you two are in mine." He stated before leaving and hiding in Dirk's room instead. He, luckily, still had his phone on himself and he pulled it out, sending a message over pesterchum to Jade as a joke. Jade was probably asleep so it didn't really matter.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] --

TG: hey remember what i said about going into dirks room

TG: well guess where i am now

TG: insert winky face here

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] --

Dirk sighed "Sorry... Dave isn't usually so difficult..."

"No... It is fine. I think he feels bad... For what he said." He quietly replied as he looked at Dirk

"I guess so, he... always says things as a joke, and sometimes doesn't realise how hurtful it could be..." He felt his head tip, wishing he had Dave's shoulder to lean on again.

He gets himself comfortable on the bed and sighs. "Sorry... about that."

"About what?" He moved slightly so he could rest against Karkat's side, craving the warmth and comfort of another body.

"Dave…" He softly replied, still a little confused with how much Dirk was touching him, but he snuggled into him anyway.

"What about him? You like him or something? Ok, you can mack on my brother, but no kids until you've hit your second anniversary at least." Dirk tried to make it clear he was joking, but he doubted he did it very well. "Ah, I'm sorry. That probably wasn't funny."

"... No. I was... I thought I just needed to apologize and I did. Anyway, do you want to hear about the 'friends back home'...?" He asked, shrugging off Dirk's comment.

"Only if you're ok talking about it." Karkat's body heat was making him go into a sleepy-esque haze, and sleepy him was an idiot. For example, he started to nuzzle lightly into Karkat's neck to get comfortable. Damn it, sleepy-Dirk, normal Dirk'll have to deal with that later.

"Well... Karkles. A female with teal blood called Terezi, my closest friend..." He began, snuggling a little into Dirk who nodded, silently prompting Karkat to continue. "She is the reason why I am here... And why my blood colour got found out." He sighs, sniffing a little

"Oh..." He pulled Karkat into a hug, kissing at his head. He rocked himself, rocking Karkat with him.

"Yeah... There was a highblood who called me Kar... He is the leader of the mob who is chasing me..."

"Want... me to stop?"

"No… What was that thing you did with your mouth just then..?"

"It was a kiss; humans use different kisses to show affection. How I kissed you would be similar to how I would kiss Dave. Then there's a kiss on the cheek, which is used for greeting. A kiss on the lips is used for lovers, or those with romantic attraction to each other."

"Oh... Alright then." He smiled a little "Kitkat was what I was called by a troll called Vriska, because she explored human foods and found a wrapper of a Kitkat, and I was bullied for that…" He sighed "I was called Karkitty by a nice troll called Nepeta, but she liked me for some reason. I didn't want to date her and she hated me for the rest of time." He snuggled into Dirk immensely after several flashbacks popped into his head.

He held Karkat closer, going back to pressing gentle kisses on Karkat's head. "Sounds rough... Troll life must be tough."

He sobbed a few times before continuing. "I was called KK by the nerd troll. And I was once called... Mr Vantas by... The guy who... always beat me up." He sighed. "I still have cracked ribs from the beat ups..."

Dirk stayed silent, just holding him. He pressed a single, light kiss to each of the horns before pulling Karkat as close as possible. "I'm sorry you had to live like that...

He flinched when his horns were touched. "Please don't feel sorry, no one else does."

"You haven't realized by now? I'm a very sympathetic person. And I bet Dave would agree. Speaking of, do you want to... talk to him alone for a bit? I mean, we've had a few one-on-one conversations, but you and Dave..."

"We had one before falling asleep... It is up to you Dirk." The first time he normally said the male's name, it felt weird rolling off his tongue.

He smiled as Karkat said his name "I think it would benefit you both to have another chat. Especially with how you and Dave reacted earlier... Clear the air between you so to say."

He smirked then "And, if you want to get him back for the leaf thing earlier, just say 'we did it on your bed' and laugh"

"That would be good to say" He smirked before his face went to expressionless. "Umm... Can I have help... to... Wherever Dave went?"

"Of course." He looped his arm around Karkat's shoulder and led the troll to his room, knocking on the door. "Dave, Karkat's here to talk to you about something." He kicked the door open afterwards, helping Karkat onto the bed.

Dave was currently lying on the bed, looks at the two curiously. "Thanks for waiting for a reply." He said sarcastically.

"It's my room you little shit." He ruffled Dave's hair before walking back to the doorway and shutting the door behind him, giving them their privacy.

Dirk walked back to Dave's room, fixing his covers. He knew Dave probably wouldn't care, but it gave him something to do.

"Dave... Can I talk to you...?" Karkat asked, for some reason he became placid with his voice.

Dave snorts at Dirk as he leaves before nodding to Karkat, sitting up. "What is it?"

"... I'm sorry about…. earlier." He started off saying, with a small sigh. "I didn't mean... I…"

"Don't worry, you can't get a guy knocked up, it's impossible, you're safe for now." Dave snorted, patting a hand on Karkat's back. "But you can't stop me from saying shit like that, nope, nevar!"

"But we did it on your bed..." He said, keeping his face serious and deadpanned. "It was fun too. Dirk is a silent screamer."

Dave paused, looking at Karkat oddly. "Dirk told you to say that, didn't he?" He asked, lips pressed tightly together to stop himself from scowling or smiling.

"Well, he knows what a bone bulge and a nook are now." He continued, not letting himself get caught out as he moved closer to Dave.

Dave snorted. "Hey Dirk! What do you think I was doing in here while you two were having a feels jam?!" He called out before smirking triumphantly.

"Licking your bone bulge?" The troll suggested before sighing "Yes he said I could say that."

He called out, making sure Dave could hear him "I dunno, I guess both our sheets'll need washing though." For good measure, he actually _did_ remove the sheets to throw in the wash. "You make a really large mess Karkat." Sure, he was referring to the spilt noodles on the ground, but his and Dave's one-ups pretty much consisted of innuendo. He threw the sheet lazily into the laundry, before grabbing a mop and starting to soak up the mess of noodles on the ground.

"Yup." He snuggles into Dave "And he said I could say that because It is bragging to you."

Dave snorted at Dirk's comment and decided to ignore it looking to Karkat. "I have no idea what that is but sure go ahead."

"I also forgot to mention-" He hugs Dave, "I forgot to wash my hands~"

"I'm still not falling for it." Dave said, hugging Karkat back slightly.

"Yeah... I know" He gave up the fake facade, back into his real emotion. "I just needed a laugh…"

Finally, the floor was clean and Dirk walked back to his room, opening the door. "Your sheets were covered in crumbs and shit, so it's in the wash. Get yourself another one."

"No, fuck you, I'm not made of money." Dave responded to Dirk, glancing sideways at Karkat. "Karkat... are you ticklish?" He asked curiously, mischievously.

He shakes his head. "The person who last said that cracked my ribcage."

"I meant from the other, slightly cleaner, sheets we have in this house." He rolled his eyes.

"Oh..." It was a reply to both of them.

"And I'm not joking about the whole thing with me in your room. Look, I even messaged Jade about it." He held his phone to Dirk, smirking triumphantly.

Dirk blinked. "You'll have to do worse to actually make me believe you." The troll snuggled into Dave a little, like an innocent little wriggler.

"I'll show you my computer log later. Busy aye tee em." Dave doesn't say full words when he can just spell them out in shortened form. He finds it easier.

"Right, have fun, no kids until your second anniversary ect, ect." He closed the door again. Dirk moved back into Dave's room, lying on his side on the bed. He dozed lightly for a few minutes, resting his eyes briefly.

He sighed and rolled over. He couldn't even doze, Dave's room smelled too different and unfamiliar for him to even nap by himself... He sat up, and walked outside, first writing a note explaining that he'd gone for a walk. The fresh air felt good, so he closed his eyes and let it wash over him... He walked around the block a few times before getting bored, and taking the stairs to the roof instead. Up there, he could see across a large portion of the town. He watched the people walk by, wondering if the one's who had hurt Karkat were among them...

Dave rolled his eyes. "Typical."

"What is going on...?" Karkat asked, confused at the exchanged.

"Sarcasm is going on." Dave said.

"Oh…" Karkat moved a little, before grabbing the pillow and put his head on it.

"Hah, you gonna fall asleep again?" Dave teased even as he pulled himself up even more onto the bed.

"No... My knee is just so sore…" He replied light-heartedly.

"That's fine; do you want me to help or something? I can get some meds to help get rid of the pain too, I think we got some of them somewhere..." Dave offered.

He nodded, not knowing exactly what he is actually asking for, but if it was a pain reliever, then that was all he needed to know.

"M’kay just wait here for a tick." Dave said, pushing himself up from the bed and out of the room, walking back into the bathroom and scanning through the medicine cabinet until he found the painkillers. He gave a small sigh and walked back towards Dirk's room, seeing a note ad picking it up as he recognized Dirk's handwriting. Dave wasn't too fazed that Dirk was out for a walk and soon tossed the note into the bin, returning to Karkat with a glass of water and a single pill. "Ok, so, put this in your mouth." Dave lifted the pill up in one hand as he sat down on the bed, and swallow with a mouthful of water. It helps, trust me." He offered the two items to Karkat after explaining.

He looked at the pill curiously "...alright." He took the pill and put it into his mouth, before using the water to swallow it- OH GOG IT TASTED AWFUL. He swallowed it and began to cough and splatter, spitting a little blood out of his mouth in the process. "What the fuck?"

"Uhhhhhh... what? Something wrong with the water?" Dave was a bit confused as he took the cup of water out of Karkat's hand, looking it over curiously.

Karkat shook his head "No the fucking pill tastes like dirt!" His tongue hated the taste as he looked weirdly at Dave.

"Yeah, p much. That's why you get water with it." He pushed the cup back into Karkat's hand. "Drink and get rid of the icky taste." He skulls the water, almost choking on the liquid. "Whoa, careful there!"

Dirk quietly paced the perimeter of the roof, wondering about Karkat’s future once he healed. It wasn't that easy to just let him stay with them, there were too many people around, they'd slip up and Karkat would be found eventually... And then there was the issue of Bro. Je paused. "Oh shit, what about Bro?" He raced back into the apartment. "Dave, Dave!"

Dave looked to the door. "Yo, in here still!" He called out, not moving from his place on the bed.

"Dave, I had a realization. A very _bad_ realization!"

"And that is...?"

"Bro"

Karkat began to cough uncontrollably, spitting saliva and blood everywhere. Blood began to dribble out of his mouth from his horrific coughing, which turned into wheezing very soon.

"Fuck."

Dirk almost literally collapsed onto the couch. "He shows up randomly, so who knows when he'll be here! And what will he think about Karkat?!"

"Uhhhhhh." Dave quickly hurried out of the room, soon coming back with a wet flannel, has no real idea what exactly to do. He carefully held the flannel to Karkat's mouth. "Here." The troll grabbed onto the flannel and coughed into it. Dirk frowned, following Dave. "What's going on? Is everything ok?" Dave grimaced and sat back beside Karkat, rubbing his back. Tears push their way through Karkat’s eyes as he stops coughing, looking at the flannel, covered in red

Dirk hesitantly stood in the doorway. "You... need a hospital or something?

Karkat tosses the flannel away as he hides in a cocoon of his whole body mass.

Dave looked at dirk like 'what do?!'

The troll decaptchalogues a bucket he picked up to cook his food in and vomits in it.

Dirk backed up, going a bit pale himself before turning quickly.

"Ugh.... Dirk! Get another bucket!" Dave called after him, still rubbing a hand over Karkat's back.

"O-on it!" Honestly, why vomit? Blood, broken bones? He could deal with those. But he couldn't for the life of him go anywhere near vomit. He grabbed a few extra containers, kicking them to Dave to avoid throwing up himself.

Dave grumbled, rolling his eyes a bit but still he offered the items to Karkat who sat there, shivering and clearly in pain. Dave's thoughts: 'fuck, what do I do?!'

Karkat is eventually calm after the spilling of his insides, but something just sent a sharp pain in his chest. Oh gog, you have got to be kidding. He holds a hand out to Dave, this one clean and hasn't been touched by anything from his inside.

Dave doesn't really hesitate to take his hand, using his other one to continue rubbing small circles onto the troll's back, trying to comfort him.

"I'll call Roxy, she might be able to help!" He quickly moved away from his room. Yes, Roxy. Roxy was good. She was the one who had to take care of all vomit-related messes in the house until Dave was old enough to clean up after himself. He dialled the Lalonde's number, and told Roxy to get her ass over to the apartment before hanging up and disappearing into the kitchen.

Karkat’s tears began to run down his face. "You... know about... how I broke... a few... ribs..?" He asked, shivering still as he swallows the blood that was crawling to his mouth.

"Yeah? Oh..." 'fuck, what to do?! WHAT DO TO?!' Dave worried his teeth at his lower lip, still rubbing small circles but avoiding the sides where his ribs are, just in case.

Roxy hurried to the apartment as fast as she could. Dirk was _horrible_ when it came to vomit, and Dave wasn't much better at times. She let herself in, and followed her nose past Dirk and into his room.

"I think one of them have just... Punctured something..."

Dave winces, what the fuck to do now. "Roxy, help?"

"What's wrong, first off?"

"Broken ribs might have punctured something."

He began to quiet his sop, his eyes full of pain as they droop closed a little

She frowned, there wasn't enough help here to fix the damage, but she knew a troll-friendly hospital... "Dave, do me a favour. The place we're taking him, call him your 'tamed' troll. It's the only way to get the help he needs."

"Uhhhh, okay? Karkat? You okay with that?"

"No... I cannot... Go to a ... Hospital!" He knows that if he goes in, he will be culled. You know, the 'Cull all mutant bloods thing'

"Why not? What's wrong?"

"Sweetie, we can't help you here. The hospital I know is very professional"

"Mutant..." He breathed out as he sobs again "It is.. A death.. Sentence!"

"Humans aren't like that, no. C'mon."

"Besides, I'm sure Rose can persuade or blackmail anyone to her beck and call whenver she wants. Right?"

"If Dave claims you're his, legally they cannot kill you no matter your blood colour,"

"And that."

"...Y...ea…h.." He barely replied, pushing the words through his teeth "..I...go."

"Rose. Rosie, Rosie, Rosie. Come help"

Curious from Rose's rapid exit, Rose followed her to the apartment. Entering into the apartment she paused at the sight of the pain ridden Karkat in Dirk’s room. "My, my, what is going on here?"

"Karkat got broken ribs, gonna take him to the hospital, he’s frightened, the little baby."

He sits there, awake for a few more seconds before his eyes roll to the back of his head and his hand falls limp. He fell unconscious.

"We don't have time for this, he needs help /now/." She raced out of the room to grab Dirk's keys since his car was faster. "Stay here, and keep away from your room so I don't have twice the mess to clean up" she called to him before rushing back to everyone.

"Oh..... uhhhhhhh........"

Rose replied "Of course... I’m sure the story behind this particular occurrence is most fascinating, but I digress."

"I'm gonna have to carry him huh?" Dave sighed.

Rose replied with slight sarcasm. "Indeed"

"I'm afraid so sweetie, come on, no time to waste!"

"Fuck, I hope he ain't heavy" Dave added as he scooped his hands underneath the troll's body, picking him up. He turned to Roxy and Rose "Where’s the hospital located?"

"I believe it is to the North, I’m unaware of its particular placement."

Roxy walked to Dirk's car in the garage, putting herself in the driver's seat. "I know where it is, I'll drive." She smiled at Dave who was following. "I'm not a lunatic driver like your brother so don't worry."

Rose followed behind and commentated "If mildly erratic."

"C'mon Davey! Move him!" She honked the horn for good measure.

Dave rolled his eyes but walked to the back of the car. "Rose, can you open the door. I got my hands full right now." He stated.

"Indeed, they are currently encumbered" Rose replied as she opened the door

"Rosie, are you staying with Dirk or coming with us?"

Dave nodded in thanks, shuffling the still unconscious Karkat into the back and closing the door behind himself. He did his best to buckle Karkat in first, even if the troll was leaning over and couldn't hold himself up properly. Dave soon gave up and buckled himself in. "Lead the way, wonderful driver Lalonde." He joked.

"If it is not a bother, I would inquire to come with you."

"You can come, oh eff see."

"Your help would be appreciated."

"Then I shall help you with this particular incident."

"Then get in and let's go!" Rose quickly followed them into the car.

"Go now." Roxy jumped the engine into life, quickly leaving the garage and speeding down the road towards the hospital.

* * *

He has been watching this building for several hours, this was the report he got that the mutant troll went. He watched as he was shoved into a car and watched as the car drove off. He got out a piece of paper and began to write on it. "WWe havve found the gutterblooded mutant troll. He currently fuckin’ resides at a tall buildin’, on the eastern side of towwn. He has been livvin’ wwith humans. He must be culled." The figure put the parchment away before disappearing into the hidden alleyways and out of sight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> Ash: i have to go nows anyway  
> Gem: See you later then  
> Ash: cya! ^.^  
> Gem: You're going to hate what I made happen  
> Ash: O_O where.....?  
> Gem: On FIWTAFU  
> Ash: e_e i will be back tomorrow...........  
> Ash: cya  
> Gem: hahaha  
> Ash: e3e  
> Gem: you're paranoid now~  
> *tomorrow*  
> Ash: should i be worried now?  
> Gem: yes  
> Gem: By the way FIWTAFU has updated  
> Gem: Slendy says hi scary dave  
> Ash: lol  
> Gem: Scary Dave~! Hello~  
> Ash: lol heys! ^.^  
> Ash: OH FUCK YOU GEM! FUCK YOU!  
> Ash: why drama whyyyyyyyyyyy  
> Gem: :3  
> Ash: -.-  
> Gem: *hug*  
> Ash: *huggles* >:I how to fix this......  
> Gem: Make Dirk eat? *almost said eat Dirk*  
> Ash: XD


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have decided that you may talk to the authors if we are online. Main place we chat is here:  
> http://msparp.com/chat/ST1LLNOTSORRYFORP4RTYROCK1NG  
> As usual, Bec=Karkat Ash=Dave Gem=Dirk  
> See you there if you want to talk to us :3

Dave kept glancing to Karkat to make sure he was alright.

Rose observed Dave with mild curiosity "Shall I analyse that expression of yours?"

"Don't you dare start your psychoanalytical bullshit, Lalonde!"

"Merely curious" Rose replied settling into her seat. Roxy did her best to drive quickly yet stay within the speed limit; they didn't need a cop flagging them down today,

"How far away is the hospital?" Dave asked, purposely trying to distract Rose.

"A weak deflection like that cannot fool me." Rose stated with an interested smile

"Not too far sweetie! We'll get there soon!"

"Ok, please hurry before your sister melts my mind into a puddle with her mind reading bullshittery that she has or something. Seriously!"

"What are you feeling Dave? Are you frightened? You seem to have forsaken your cool exterior?"

"I am not feeling anything, look, no feelings here, nope." He put on his best poker face.

The driver turned sharply into the parking space for the hospital. "I will continue this later; I would encourage you to hurry."

"Ok Dave, pick him up and run in there screaming about how your troll needs help."

"What? I'm not going in there screaming. That's not cool." He picked Karkat up nevertheless.

"Not the time for the cool act, just do it"

"You gonna save his life or not kiddo?"

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaugh!" Dave let any of his remaining dignity go screaming out the door, pretty much like what he did as he hurried as fast as he could into the hospital. Before he entered he sent a glare to the girls like 'I hate you both so fucking much'. Dave is screaming at the two girls internally, still cradling the unconscious Karkat in his arms.

Dave had decided to try to play along with the act Rose was forcing him into, hurrying to the nearest doctor. "Help, I don't know what to do. I think he broke his ribs, but I can't tell then he vomited and fell unconscious!" He hates Rose and Roxy so much right now.

Rose calmly left the car and walked in before she looked at the doctor. "Sorry for that, he appears to have panicked."

Suddenly Rose received a phone call and talked for a few minutes. Rose then looked at Dave and stated "I beg your pardon but it appears an important matter has come up, I wish you success."

"You make it sound like a mission." He states with a sharp edge in his words before Rose could leave.

"Uh, but how do you know it is not?" Rose countered with a sly smile. "But with that I must leave." Rose then walked back to the car and entered in. "I appear to have to leave, would you be willing to drop me off?"

“Sure.” Roxy replied before she drove Rose off to where she was needed before she finally made it back to the building’s garage, parking the car neatly and making sure all doors were locked before heading back to the apartment.

Dave groaned in annoyance as Rose left before letting out another shout to attract some attention.

"Calm down, you will give everyone a headache" A figure appeared from behind a door, standing there with orange tanned skin. "I must say, you are in quite a mess, the two of you I mean." He walked closer and looked at the Boy and the thing in his arms. "Are those candy corn's glued to his head?" He smirks but doesn't continue that conversation. "My apologies. I am Dr Andrew Felix Hussie. May you please follow me before you make a mess all over the beloved floor? I do not think the cleaner will be pleased in drying off crusted troll blood."

Clearly, 'The Ninth Troll Doctor' is not amused in missing out on his break, but if it was to save this troll's life, it doesn't matter. And this troll seems to be a mutant. The Doctor never thought in his wildest dreams that he would be able to save a Mutant's life, because these kind of trolls were as rare as a Jadeblooded troll or a Fuchsiablooded troll. God, he was lucky he studied this unintentionally at a some random place called Harvard University. Dr Hussie then lead the two of them to an emergency operation room entrance without missing a beat. He then pushes an alarm and several doctors appear almost immediately, with a bed and everything.

"Alright, put the troll on the bed. We will need to check his internals and give him a helping hand. The watching bay is to your right, through that door, if you wish to watch the Operation. I have a horrible feeling that he might have attained some sort of illness." He pauses before continuing again, not missing a beat "We will see how this turns out, however there are no guarantees."

Dave grimaced, mind coming up with many unwanted possibilities and only one positive one which was that Karkat got better without having too much damage done to his internal system. He carefully laid the troll down on the bed anyways and stepped back, looking at Karkat worriedly for a few seconds before turning and disappearing through the door to the right, glancing through the watching window and grimacing again, going so far so as to close his eyes. He didn't want to see what a troll looked like on the inside, nope, nope. He turned away, back leaning against the glass as he waited, lip twitching ever so slightly with the strain of him trying to keep a straight face. It was hard, he admits, to not get over emotional. It's real easy to get attached, it seems. He wishes Dirk was here at least...

* * *

Roxy barged past Dirk, yelling about how she was going to clean his room, and how he better not have tried to do it himself. "Well hel- _lo_ to you too" he muttered sarcastically at her back.

"Yeah, yeah but seriously. your room is a mess! Why don't you clean it more often? Your whole apartment is a literal pigsty, oh em gee, I don't see why there aren't pigs running round in there right now..." Thankfully Roxy wasn't piss drunk and was actually thinking properly.

"Shut up and just get the vomit out of there so I can actually go into my room sometime this year."

Roxy rolled her eyes but picked up the bucket, nose scrunching up as she took it away and dumped it down the toilet before washing it out, placing it on the ground by the door to the hall in the bathroom before returning to Dirk's room to clean the place up a bit. "I don't get why you have to live so messily, sersly."

"We're two teenage boys, of course we're gonna be messy." He had a can of air... stuff. He didn't know what it was exactly, just that it covered up the smell of vomit in his room extremely well.

Roxy rolled her eyes and threw a few of the clothes scattered around the room into the dirty clothes basket which was unused(unsurprisingly) in the far corner. "But still, there is rubbish, sitting on your desk when there is a bin right near by that is empty, same thing goes for your clothes and the basket." She swiped the rubbish into the bin and began picking up little bits here and there from the ground.

He set the can on the desk. "I'm a little busy doing Bro's job of taking care of Dave to pay attention to the state of my room" He clamped his mouth shut, that had ended up snappier than he'd planned.

Roxy paused to look at Dirk, eyebrow raised. "If you needed help with that you only had to ask. I know how hard it is to basically raise someone else but now Rose is really independent and I think she raises me sometimes haha!" She offers Dirk a small smile, before going sympathetic. "You know Rose and I can help whenever, sweetie."

"I know, but man pride and all that shit." He walked over to her to give her a small embrace, a tiny gesture that didn't even scratch the surface of the gratitude he felt towards her and rose.

Roxy gladly hugged him back, smoothing small circles on his back. "We can help, you know. It's ok if you need to ask for help. Something like the best leader is one that knows when they’re defeated and saves what could have been lost before it is. I think rose told me that once. I can't remember what context or anything so, meh."

He chuckled "Sounds like her."

"Yeah, it'd be weird if _I_ came up with that, hah."

He pulled back to leave a soft kiss on Roxy's forehead. Comfort kissing just seemed to be his thing, along with vomit avoidance and putting up with (and taking care of) Dave.

"Why are you comforting me when you need it more? Let me just..." She pulled his head down, since he was a bit taller than she was, and kissed him on the forehead instead, never one to enjoy being out-something in anything.

He couldn't help it, he started to laugh. Roxy just did that to him. "Ok, ok. I bow down to the empire of Roxy-topia."

"Hell yesssssssssss!" Roxy cooed with a giggle before she set about cleaning his room again.

As a bit of a bonus for her, he stepped back and gave her a sweeping bow before leaving, giving Roxy free reign of the room.

Roxy took nearly twenty minutes before the room was clean sufficiently and she walked back out of Dirk's room, looking around the living area in disgust. "You boys are pigs on the inside, I swear..."

"Yep," Feelings Jam over, he turned to face her "How'd the hospital go?"

"I didn't stay, Rose left Dave to take care of Karkat and went back home while I came back here. I don't know about Karkat and Dave. You should call him I think." She shrugged.

"Maybe, I doubt he'll wanna be disturbed with his troll boy-toy."

"He wasn't really happy and I think they put Karkat on a hospital bed so it's obviously severe..."

"Huh..." He looked at the ceiling "Wonder if Bro would be proud..."

"He'd be proud of you any time." Roxy gave him a small smile and set about cleaning up the living room. "Make yourself useful and try to help, m'kay?"

"I'm not invalid, I can help." So saying, he got up and started picking up random shit and putting it off the floor, that was making the room slightly cleaner, right?

Roxy sighed and brushed all the rubbish off of the table into a bag before tossing it beside the front door for taking out later.

"Oh, no good?"

"Rubbish equals bin, valuable-slash-needed equals me so I can put it away properly, got it?"

"Ok, ok..." He rubbed the back of his head; as long as it was off the floor it was usually clean enough for him and Dave to function effectively...

Not for Roxy apparently, as she began to organize things without being asked, soon clearing most of the crap away in record time.

"Question time, what do you think about our little troll guest?"

"He's a grump at times but he's just a little kicked puppy in my eyes, hehehe, don't tell him i said that."

"I won't, I might tell Dave though" He had an easy grin on his face, knowing Roxy would catch his joke.

"Oh you're terrible! Don't think I haven't noticed how you look at him you!" She giggled and sent him a wink.

He pretended to fall back dramatically "Oh! You've found out my horrible secret!" He was chuckling under his breath "Now I have no choice but to elope away with him.”

"Dave's not gonna like that." Roxy teased, grinning widely at him. "Oh my god my brain is being weird. Now you've got me stuck with watching you and Karkat make out, now it's switching to Dave. Oh you evil person!"

"What, Kar and Dave or Me and Dave~?"

"Oh my god, the three of you are just- blughragarnnnnnn~ this is worse than one of Rose's fan fictions..." Roxy was still laughing anyways

He chuckled again "Relax, I'm sure they don't even like each other like that"

"But what about you?" She asked, serious now.

"What about me?" He thought back over what he said.

"Do you like him like that?" She rephrased.

“Who? Dave? In case you forgot he's my brother."

"Oh my god, you should know what I’m talking about!" She paused, cogs turning in her head. "You should know unless..." She sends a sceptical look at Dirk.

He didn't like that look. "What's going on in that head of yours?"

"Nothing........."

"Nope, I'm curious now, tell me."

"I think Reading Rose's fan fictions for 'proof reading' has made my mind a bit odd..." She avoided answering the question.

His tone turned serious "spill it. I'm not gonna get angry."

Roxy paused and spoke, quiet as if she was afraid she might get in trouble for saying it. "Do you like Dave?"

He froze, shocked, yet mind working overtime. In certain lights, the things he did for Dave could seem borderline incestuous... But, did he actually have repressed romantic feelings?

"I'msorryIdidn'treallymeanitIwasjustthinkingaloud!" Roxy said quickly, backing up.

" No... It's ok..." He sounded shocked at his own tone "Roxy... I... think I might."

Roxy... didn't know what to do. It was wrong in her mind but... this was Dirk and Dave, they did a lot of things that were wrong... And she cared about Dave and Dirk... "Uh..."

He shook his head "No way, no, nonono I'm interpreting them wrong. I _can't_ like my own brother like that!" He stumbled back.

"Dirk, calm down." She looked over to him, trying to be calm. "Like, it's ok, nothing wrong with that, and who wouldn't be attracted to Dave?"

"He's not your _BROTHER_ Roxy!"

"Rose is my sister, I can understand on some level if I think about it."

He tried to steady his breathing, but seriously, how else was he going to react when he found out his platonic feelings for his brother weren't so Platonic after all. "Y-You may think it's nothing wrong, but what about the rest of the world?! Dave'll get mistreated just because his brother likes him romantically- oh god, what about Bro? He'll take him away from me, I'll never see him again ohgodohgodohgod-"

"Hey! Hey! Calm down! Shhhhhhhh!" She carefully walked over to him, taking hold of his head in her hands like Rose had when she was last here. "Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... calm down. Breathe, breathe. C'mon, you gotta breathe and stop thinking for a moment here. Shhhhhhh.........."

He closed his eyes and breathed, trying to calm down. He felt himself relax, and he looked at her in question "What should I do...?"

"Just wait, try to figure out exactly what you're feeling. If it is too much then call Rose and I over, okay?"

He nodded hesitantly "O-ok... But he'll know something's different, and if he confronts me I don't know if I'll be able to keep it from him..."

"It may be better if he knows... but who am I to talk, should I get Rose instead?" She tilted her head curiously, waiting for Dirk to answer; this was Dirks choice, not hers.

"I-I don't know. What if he hates me for it? Or it gets awkward between us?"

"He won't hate you; you're his brother. Nothing will change that."

He took in a shuddery breath. "You don't know for sure..."

"No. I don't." Roxy slumped her shoulders a bit, looking at Dirk before kissing his forehead again; he needs it. "Just don't worry about it."

"Maybe I should just keep this to myself..."

"Rose could help...?" She offered.

"I... I'll talk to her about it..."

"Want me to call her to come over while Dave's out?"

"Yeah... I should get this shit sorted before..." 'I have to see him again' his mind helpfully finished.

Roxy nodded, patting the side of his face before releasing him, pulling her phone out and calling Rose. "She needs to be picked up, I'll be back in a while. Don't do anything too drastic..." She gave him a small smile before disappearing to pick Rose up.

Dave didn't look through the one way window even though the whole point of the watching room was to actually watch what was going on. Dave didn't want to see what Karkat looked on the inside though and opted for simply leaning against the glass, trying to not think too much.

The operation took a few hours, and blood was everywhere. Overall, the troll has a dislodged rib, that had ripped a hole into his lung, which was the source of the blood. Considering that his title was of the blood kind, The Doctor was able to fix it up, as it nothing happened. He also tended to the trolls knee. The injury wasn't serious, but he managed to get the troll into a knee boot. It was interesting to see how he didn't even need to sedate the troll, he was unconscious on his own. Interesting... The Huss then declared the operation finished, moving out of the room and beginning to clean himself up. The troll would then be taken to a spare room, hidden from most other rooms, by nurses.

Dave heard some of the commotion of them beginning to move Karkat and he quickly hurried after them, slowing to a walk to keep alongside the bed as it was moved to another room. Karkat might freak out when he woke up, that won't be a good thing...

The Doctor went out, after loosing his blood stained clothes for not blood stained ones and entered into the room. He saw the Blond haired boy and put a hand on his shoulder. "I was rather surprised that this operation was very simple. He will live, this is assured. Also, he was not put into an induced coma or any sleep, therefore he will possibly be awake in several hours max." The Doctor pulled out a document. "He had a cracked rib that stabbed into his lung, several natural healed broken bones and several fractures. He has also developed 'Policeman's heel' which would make it rather hard for him to run. He is severely underweight and I have dubbed him as deathly anorexic. I am shocked that he was able to live through the trip to get here, let alone the surgery." The Doctor put the document away, and continued without saying a beat "His knee wasn't very injured at all. It was a scrape if anything, just pressed on a lot, which it also got infected and deep."

"The point is, to a basic degree, is that he will live. No drama's No Problems. Now I need to go have my fucking lunch, or should I now say, Dinner break. Thank you" The Doctor leaves, without another word. He didn't care if the brat had questions, he was fucking starving, so much he could eat a giant, green serpent.

He was sitting beside the bed, drumming his fingers and glancing at Karkat from time to time. His resentment towards the girls had faded, now it was just boredom while waiting for Karkat to wake up.

Half an hour pass before a small groan emits from Karkat, his fingers wiggling a little.

Dave was at attention immediately "You ok dude? Like, need anything?"

"... N...m" He hasn't fully awoken. He must have been tired or something. He moves his arm a little, closer to where Dave is. He carefully grabbed Karkat's hand, figuring that the troll could use knowing someone sort of familiar was with him in hospital.

Karkat squeezes his hand, shifting a little before pushing his eyes open, but very slowly. "… Ng... Da… mv?"

"Here, Karkles." He couldn't resist slipping in a nickname, who knew when the next opportunity to get away with it would arrive?

"Da… ve?" He had his eyes opened, but there was a lot of blur in his vision "Wh...ar... e?"

"You're in a hospital room, away from the crowds so no one can see you."

Oh no... This was the place he didn't want to be- wait. Did Dave just say… away from crowds..? "People..?"

"No one's gonna see you here, only the doctor who treated you, and me obviously, can come in."

"..." He sniffed a little, as he has a runny nose, but managed to look at Dave. "…So…rr…e…"

"What for? We picked you off the street, so obviously we gotta take you to the hospital when you need to go."

"... Be...a… pain" He replied. Karkat was going to say more, but he couldn't find it in himself to do it. He just squeezed Karkat's hand, keeping an eye on the door for the Doctor. Though he doubted he'd check on Karkat so soon. Karkat was finally able to see one of Dave, a good sign. "And.... the vomit."

"It's fine, thought Dirk was a huge baby about it and had to call Roxy over it." Davee shifted his chair closer, so Karkat didn't have to strain his voice.

"… heh" Karkat tried to laugh, but it sounded more pathetic that forced laugher from a video game.

"You don't have to strain yourself. I know that wuss Dirk is hilarious but don't kill yourself over it."

"... Could die... laughing" He commented as he coughed a little.

He patted Karkat's head, deliberately brushing past his horns. "Sure, sure." Karkat flinched a little at Dave's touch, before easing himself into it.

He grinned "Man, I'm glad you're all weak from your operation so I can do this as long as I like."

"No... I just ... I kinda like the touch, after a while of it happening I guess"

He smiled, "Then you want me to keep going?"

"Sure" He snuggles into the bed, tilting his head further into Dave’s hand, his gaze a little lazy

"Heh, lucky me, I get some hardcore nuzzles while Dirk has to deal with Roxy."

"More like touching a rats nest Dave." He commented with a small, hidden smirk.

"Shush. Only snuggles now" He moved as close as possible so Karkat could rest on him.

"I have a… question. What is it... with you, and Dirk… and snuggles, including me?" He was curious, so he asked, clearly.

"Well, it's free warmth, who wouldn't like that?"

"I have got to say that was the shittiest… excuse I have ever heard. If you wanted free warmth, you'd go to Dirk." Karkat's voice was blunt.

"But he's not here, you are."

"... Fine, whatever. You know... You don't need to be here."

"If I leave you alone, they'll probably throw you out of here. And you're not well enough to be on the streets by yourself." He went back to petting Karkat's head.

"I have been worse... And I don't like being here anyway." He was lying through his teeth, but H\he didn't like being here, that was truth.

"The Doc has to give you the all clear, then you'll be back at the apartment, where Roxy's probably cleaned up."

"Right... He would be back after some time... Damn it." Karkat replied. He was severely conflicted currently

"Hmmm, say, what do you think about Roxy and Rose from your brief experience of them?"

"I... Tried to kill Rose, Roxy is nice, when she is intoxicated." He whispered, his voice gave up on him

"Hmm... I'll worry about that later, just sleep for now ok?"

"I honestly do not need sleep" No, he was too scared for any of that to be honest. The white walls were petrifying him.

"Ok then... Relax."

"... Okay." He shifts a little, the pain in his chest eased drastically.

Dave was still holding Karkat's hand, so he gave it a small squeeze as the troll rolls over, to face Dave, putting his other hand on top of hiss.

He looked at Karkat, raising an eyebrow in question, earning a lazy smile in reply. He placed his other hand on top of Karkat's, wondering if this was what the troll wanted.

"... Thank...s for helping me."

"It's no problem. Any decent human would do that." The troll was taken aback from that comment... Any decent human? He let a saddened face expression slip past, unintentionally.

"Trolls don't do that shit do they?" Dave said quietly.

"... No…" He softly replied, snuggling in the blanket a little.

"Decent humans are a majority of the population, so at least you should be safe in our company..." He gave Karkat's hand another small squeeze.

"... Lucky" Karkat gasped as a reply, shivering a little.

Dave moved his mouth to the side, thinking. "Should I get another blanket?" He asked slowly.

"... If you want…" Karkat sighed a little as he snuggled himself around Dave's hands, because they were so fucking warm

"I'd prefer to be here..." He says with a faint smile, not bothered that Karkat was using his hands as a heat pack.

".. Cool." He smiled a little at Dave as his eyes began to droop a little.

Dave paused and smiled to Karkat, meaning to say something else but his phone got a message and he was cut short as he retracted one hand to check it.

Karkat’s eyes closed as he drifts off into a light slumber, though Dave barely noticed.

Dave grumbled lightly at the purple text he found on his screen. 'Rose: You appear to be required at your apartment as soon as possible. Be seeing you soon.' He looked back to Karkat, seeing he was asleep before carefully pulling his hand back and standing up.

"Ahhh, it would seem that he was awake?" The Doctor said, walking into the room. "Well, considering he is who he is, I can let him go. Just hide him would you?" That Huss asked, creating little Fuss.

"What?" Dave wasn't really listening.

The Doctor sighed. "He can go." Wow, this kid was stupid.

Dave silently glared at the man behind his shades but nodded. "You got a wheelchair or should I just carry him like I carried him into here?"

"You want a wheelchair, you'll need to rent it. I think it is easier on you and him if you carry him out and disappear in the shadows." The Doc said, before stepping towards the Troll. "A troll like him in the city must mean he is on the run, and in the current condition of him, staying in a public place isn't going to help at all. I suggest you carry him out."

Dave nodded and pulled the blankets off of Karkat's body, trying to be very careful as he slid his hands underneath the troll's shoulders and knees, lifting and remaining as steady as he could manage.

"There you go. Do you need to get a lift from someone?"

"I got shit all on the list of transportation. What do you think?"

"I do not know, I was wondering on how you got here. For some reason I thought you were able to drive. Anyway, I can ring someone up to pick you up. I am not officially authorized to drive people around, also I am not a fucking Taxi service."

"Don't worry 'bout it, I'll call up my cousin; she can drive." He stood up straight, rolling his shoulders a bit, getting used to the added weight before he moved over and began to walk towards the building's exit.

"Okay, nice to see a Mutant troll." He smirked before absconding.

Dave grumbled lightly in reply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> ／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼: Dave  
> Dave: fuck  
> Dave: NO  
> ／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼: Would you like to make a contract ?  
> ／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼: I sense great magical powers from you, Dave.  
> Dave: fuck you no  
> Dave: bitch come any closer and imma slap you!  
> ／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼: hehehehe  
> Dave: e.e idk whats going on with life anymore...


	12. Chapter 12

Dirk rested back against the couch, mind racing. _'Do I love Dave like that?'_ He was almost afraid to find out the answer...

He got up, only to start pacing the lounge, thoughts going wild. "Shit, what should I do? I know Roxy said to tell him... But I don't think I can..." He sat back down and put his head in his hands.

He sighed, wringing his hands. He wondered when Rose was coming... Unless Roxy was getting... Dave instead... He sat up, an 'oh shit' look on his face.

He fled to his room, shutting the door. Nope, he wasn't talking to Dave about this.

He sat on the bed rubbing his temples. He didn't know what would be worse; telling his cousin or telling Dave...

"I'm guessing he is in his room according to the lack of his presence in other areas of his home?" Rose asked Roxy, shuffling past the place which looked far cleaner than it previously did.

"Possibly, I mean, seriously, I ain't a mind reader." She replied, too eager to wanting a drink right now.

He heard them in the lounge, and figured he might as well face the music. He opened the door to look at them from his room. "Ok, Rose is here, she can come in and you can leave you manipulative harpy." He knew it was unfair to take that attitude with Roxy, but he _was_ fairly put off with her at the moment.

"Well what crawled up your ass and died. And have you heard from Dave?" She asked, concerned about the troll's well being

Rose politely waited, smiling the whole while and listening to the conversation with a pleased and smug expression coated on her face.

"No, I haven't heard from him. Are you coming in or not Rose?"

"I'm coming, Roxy, would you mind waiting out here since Dirk wouldn't appreciate you listening in on our conversation?"

"Fine, I'll go check up on him."

"Yes, please stay away." He moved back so Rose could actually get into the room, sitting on his bed.

"Fucking gonk." She added as she left the apartment complex, going to see Dave at the Hospital. Wow, Dirk was on his male period or something.

Rose ignored Roxy as she practically glided into Dirk's room, looking around curiously. "Roxy cleaned your room." She asked/presumed.

"Yes. Did she tell you?"

"Something along the lines of your relationship with Dave may or may not be changed or at risk."

"Ye... Yes..."

"Would you care to elaborate?"

He leaned back nervously "I... I Think... I'm romantically attracted... to Dave..."

Rose nodded, not even surprised in the least. "When did you first realise or start to believe this possibility was/is true?"

"You're not surprised. Why?" He looked up at her curiously.

Rose simply placed both hands behind her back, blinking slowly. "Considering the amount of time the two of you had been around each other, the lack of an outlet for such emotions that you are afraid you might inhabit for him and the, not so sadly, attractiveness of my cousin it was one of the most likely possibilities or scenarios I had come up with if something were to happen between the two of you."

He blinked in confusion "What?"

"I had expected this to happen since a _looooong_ time ago." She smiled knowingly, eyes squinted only slightly that if Dirk didn't know Rose he wouldn't have been able to notice it.

"Oh..." Well, great. The only upside to Rose knowing was that Dave probably didn't.

"I would like to discuss the topic to which you believe your 'romantic feelings' extend towards Dave." She moved calmly, calculated, and sat on the bed beside Dirk, giving him some space but keeping close enough to physically comfort him with her presence.

"Jeez, I dunno, do brothers normally starve themselves to the point of anorexia just so the other can eat and be healthy, knowing that... he's healthy and happy, making your heart grow warm, and... feeling so overly protective, way more than a brother should be..."

"I was mainly trying to focus on the points such as to the extents you would like to engage in. More-or-less, in non-brotherly acts. I am merely worried about how far this might possibly go in the future and wondering whether I should intervene or not." Rose remained calm the whole way through that. How the fuck...?

He sighed nervously "I... Don't know. I'm not going to... make a move on him." He felt so awkward, talking to his _cousin_ about the kind of non-brotherly actions he wanted to do towards his /brother/.

"If you are feeling uncomfortable, put it this way; I have made, perhaps, over three main characters based off of you alone, not to mention those that I have altered to fit Dave's persona and reckless behaviour. They have been put into multiple relationships, to say the least.

"What." He stared at her in disbelief, not knowing if she was joking.

Rose simply smiled in return. "Of course many of those are merely one shots, I haven't shown anyone thankfully, not yet anyways... besides, this is supposed to be about you and your current emotions. Is there anything you wish to ask me?"

"No, this is awkward enough without hearing you talk about how you've written me and Dave in romantic situations." Though a small part of his brain (the one telling him to 'fess up' to Dave) was curious as to how she wrote the two of them.

Rose smiled wider, clearly feeling smug, knowing that she had attracted Dirk's interest into something that he would have previously avoided had he known the topic. "Would you rather talk to Roxy perhaps or Dave even?" She challenged.

His eyes widened, and he shook his head. "No-nonono. Not Dave."

"Mhm, should I call Roxy back so you can talk to her instead?"

He groaned. "Fine, I'll keep talking... Any more questions...?"

"How will Karkat interfere with this situation?"

"I... Don't know. I mean- he's cute and all but- wait. Shut up Rose!"

Rose smiled smugly, eyes squinting a bit more. "My, is this a possible triangle?" She teased, only being half serious.

He growled "No, because if they get together I'm not interfering. Sorry, but your three-way smut scene isn't going to happen. This isn't one of your stories Rose, I doubt Dave'll just accept the fact that I..."

"That you are undoubtedly attracted to him in a way that you believe is 'wrong' and disapprove of but cannot help how you feel? Dave should understand, he understands things like that when given the chance. Just think that through..."

He flopped backwards onto the bed "Nngh, the problem is, part of my mind doesn’t. That part wants to hold him, kiss him like I shouldn't... "

"Why don't you test things out when you find your morals and logic overcome by your urges? See what happens; Dave wouldn't react too harsh, surely."

"No! I can't do that. The risk's too great..."

"It's even greater if you let your wants build up over time..."

"I know... just... one kiss."

"Try it, see what happens." Rose urges, though for her own entertainment or for Dirk's emotional wellbeing is not decided.

"Ok, you've made me damn curious. How do you write Dave and I?"

"A true author never writes and tells until it is properly published~" Rose cooed with a small smirk on her lips.

He rolled his eyes. "In other words I bet you've made me embarrassingly open with my romantic feelings."

"I try to write you as picture perfect as you are in the real world as in my fantasy literature."

"Sure... Answer me this, do I top or bottom?" Now he was just trying to get his mind away from the discussion prior.

Rose smirks. "You may just have to find out for yourself one way or another... one way would be a lot simpler and that way doesn't involve reading my stories."

He tried valiantly to stop his blush. Dignity, you will be missed. "I'm _not_ planning on having sex with Dave!"

"Shame." It was really hard to tell if Rose was being serious or not.

"Why can't you just answer me?"

"Because it would be more... interesting to find out via another path to the resolution which would be the same thing."

"But I want to know what _you_ personally think."

"Are you _sure_?" Rose asked, narrowing her senses on Dirk.

"Can't be any more embarrassing than what we just discussed."

"Well then, sadly..." Rose paused. "I don't believe I will tell you~" She chimed out cheerfully.

He growled "You tease"

"Of course. What did you expect?"

* * *

Roxy got into the car and drove to the hospital, she was not in the mood for Dirk's bullshit. If he wanted to be stingy, the so fucking be it, all she wanted to do was help out. Sure she had a fucking crush the size of the moon on the guy, but that didn't mean he was going to jump the railing for him any time soon. Wait, why is she thinking that shit? 'Roxy Lalonde. FOCUS. You are driving' She thought as she pulled up to the side of the hospital.

He walked outside into the cold air, the sun was gone, and he had a dozing Karkat in his arms. He quickly decided to get out of harm’s way as he runs towards the bushes to his right, before seeing a familiar car in the car park. "Wait, was Roxy here the whole fucking time?" Dave muttered to himself as he literally ran over to the car, not planning to do anything else just in case he was ambushed. From what the Doctor told him, and how the fuck did Dr Hussie knew about these Trolls were beyond him, he should not be out and caught unguarded.

She gets out of the car, but see's Dave running towards her, holding the Troll in his arms. "Hey, what’s going on?"

"No time to explain, just get your ass in the car and fucking drive." The blond haired man ordered as he opened the door of the car, dived in, in a way that wouldn't injure Karkat and closed the door putting his seatbelt on in a matter of seconds.

Roxy gets into the car and begins the drive, putting her seatbelt on and closing the door. It isn't until she is on the main road when she begins to talk again "Care to explain what the fuck was that?"

"Simple, Karks here is a wanted troll, and there is no fucking way I am gonna let him become their fucking sushi filling." He fixed Karkat's seat belt buckle, arranging him so that he is sleeping on him a little, wrapping an arm around his shoulders for stability (And because he wanted to).

"You think them other trolls have mysterious masked figures spying on us? Seriously Dave, they wouldn't go that far, and anyway, who'd want to kill that sweet troll?" The blond haired girl replied, as she turned a corner.

"It is more of a hierarchy thing, and it is complicated but they want him dead." Dave deadpanned, which meant this was serious business.

"I know all of this Davey, this just doesn't explain why you were running out of the hospital like you has a rocket up your ass"

"Just in case they had spies and everything" Yeap, Dave was somewhat paranoid.

She sighs as she slows the car up. "Well, is he alright though?"

"Yes, just needs some rest. Everything is in it's place now." He smiled a little in relief.

"Well. I think we are here now" She looks out the window "Yay! I got it right on the first try this time!"

Dave just eye rolled. "Come on cuz, help me get him out."

She gets out of the car and opens the door for Dave. "Come on lazy ass, haul it out."

He manages to get out of the car, before picking Karkat up. "I am surprised he is sleeping though this whole thing."

She closes the car door, locking the car, and goes up to open the door to the apartment. "Come on slackass, it is fucking cold out here." She commented with an over-exaggerated shiver

"Right, calm your shit." He replied as he slowly got up to where Roxy is, before getting into the apartment and over to where the elevator was.

She goes inside and pushes the buttons on the elevator, and waited for it to come down.

Dave stood there, waiting for the elevator to come down.

Still waiting. It was like they were in any hurry at all.

Dave sighed, the elevator was always this slow

She stood there awkwardly

"... So" Dave began, before the ding of the elevator ran through them.

"Fucking finally god." Roxy said as she entered the elevator.

He them moves into the elevator, ready to kill any kind of obnoxious elevator music. Roxy presses the button and the doors close. She then pat's the trolls head, avoiding the horns.

"I wonder what Dirk's doing." Dave asked out loud, just to make a conversation.

"Probably being hounded at for things he does by Rose." She replied.

"Probably." The blond haired boy deadpanned, before looking down at the sleeping figure.

"He was being a royal cunt to me before I left to go see how little 'Karks was doing'."

"Typical." The ding of the elevator was heard and then he walked down a few doors, knocking on the one that he lived in.

She followed Dave.

He heard the car, going pale. "Oh god, Dave's here..."

Rose simply smiled. "I will be in the living room so as not to make this situation any more suspicious than it already is."

He groaned and followed her. "Dave'll probably expect me to help him." he offered as explanation.

"Mhm." Rose swiftly walked out and to the living room, brushing the couch cushion clean before sitting on it, resting her hands in her lap, waiting.

He was nervous as hell as he waited. He couldn't help but imagine every negative scenario in his head.

"Rose, I-I don't think I can do this..." His hands started to nervously tap while he waited. Oh god, it didn't have to be tongue Dirk! Just a simple press of the lips. "Oh god..."

"Oi Dirk, open up!"

He opened the door hesitantly. "Welcome back." He moved out of the way, trying not to tip Dave into the conflict he was feeling. To kiss or not to kiss...

Dave nodded and moved into the apartment, trying to decide on where to place the unconscious Karkat...

"He can go back in my room."

Karkat was slightly asleep now, but was waking up a little. "...nghr?"

"Wow about time he said something." Roxy commented as she danced passed Dirk, with the intent to piss him off for earlier.

"Hello Mr Grumpy Pants." Dave hummed before walking into Dirk's room, ignoring Roxy's shenanigans.

Oh fuck Karkat was waking up. Abort kiss-your-brother (for now). "Alcohol's in the kitchen." He called to Roxy as a sort of apology.

"...Tha fuk?" Gog he was so out of it.

Dave chuckled lightly and set Karkat down on the bed, easing him to lie on his back. "You're back in the Strider apartment, princess, no need to worry; your knight hath saved you from the dragons of the feared and dreaded hospital."

"Right. A fucking Strider..." He looked at Dave, dazed, before looking at Lalonde. "'ey"

"Hey Karkat." She replied, patting him on the head, missing his horns "You are a deep sleeper, it takes me forever to go to sleep, and to stay asleep."

Dirk followed Dave, somewhere in his brain not recognising 'abort'.

Rose walked into the room, having heard there entrance. "Karkat I must admit you are not looking your best."

"Nah shit Rolal."

"Your probably right there, great observation" He bluntly replied as he hissed, his side hurting a little for some odd reason.

"I think I'm gonna get some booze." Roxy said before leaving the room

"Uh... Dave?" shit, brain, no. Stop. "Look here for a sec?" No, nonono cease immediately.

"A statement of the obvious it may be, but none the less it is true"

Dave turned to look at Dirk curiously. "Hmm? You called?"

Rose with great interest stepped back to watch

Karkat could smell Dirk's nervousness from where he was. What was the older male up to?

He pressed his lips on Dave’s thoughtlessly. Oh shit, it wasn't supposed to feel this good. He lurched backwards, mumbling out apologies of 'heat of the moment'.

Karkat raised his eyebrows and managed to point at the two of them "I KNEW IT. MATE-FUCKING-SPRITS!" Dave just sort of looked at Dirk. Then at Karkat, then at Dirk like 'wut de fuq?' and he's confused like fuck. "I fucking well knew it you assholes, why did you not tell me?" Hold on. "I SLEPT WITH A COUPLE?"

He saw the confusion on Dave’s face and quickly fled to the hallway. _'Idiot!'_

"Wut... Ahhhhhhhhh...... I'm just gonna sit here, yup, ok."

"Dave." Dave sat on the bed, lips pressed firmly together, trying to think of exactly what to do or say... "You alright there?" Karkat waves a hand in front of his face.

Dave blinks a few times before finally tracking Karkat's hand movements. "Yeah, I'm here, what you want what hmmm?"

"Are you... okay?" He was concerned that his words hurt both Dave and Dirk, and the guilt began to sink in like he swallowed a 100kg weight

"Just... thinking... nothing bad."

He proceeds to hug Dave, he didn't know what was wrong with the kiss, Troll siblings had _WRIGGLERS._ "Umm..." He decided to shut up and hug the poor bastard.

"I believe it would be best to elaborate, Dirk." Dirk was not going back in there, no way. Dave was sure to feel the disgust rising soon... Rose calmly followed Dirk out of the room, looking at him

"Oh grey there Dicky!" Roxy commented as she stumbled into the room and looked at Dirk

"Leave me alone, both of you."

"I believe that leaving it at that will merely exasperate the situation, Dirk."

"I am _not_ going back there. You tell him, I can't."

"If I state it, then he will not believe me, simple as that."

"And I can't say it to him!”

Roxy offers Dirk the bottle of scotch. "Ye need it mor dan I dooooo~"

He shook his head. "No, drink up."

"In this case, I believe that may be appropriate Dirk, it may help your nerves." Roxy offered

"No, I don't want to get buzzed."

"Maybe, but you cannot leave it at that." The drunken girl shakes the bottle of scotch.

He sighed irritably "Fine." He stormed back into the room "Dave, I love you _so much_ more than a sibling should, that's why I kissed you."

"..." ‘Dave, this is brain, do something, now!’ Dave sort of did nothing, just... sat there, staring at Dirk, face still a bit confused but slowly relaxing.

Karkat lifts his head up at Dirk, with a worried expression, as if he, referring to Karkat, did something wrong.

He backed up "Shit, I-I know- You're probably really disgusted and I should leave-"

"No, I- It's fine..." Dave tried being reasonable, so far it was... sort of working? "Uh..."

"Shit, worst brother ever. I've made things awkward now! I shouldn't have told you, let alone kissed you!"

"No...." Karkat whispered, clinging onto Dave.

Sort of has a troll clinging to him and then there's Dirk practically confessing to him, uh, help? "No, whatever. I can... let it slide?" Dave offered, not sure what Dirk actually wanted right now.

Dirk pulled a poker face "No. You can't. You'll remember and go all awkward." He ignored the small part of his heart that had stung at Dave's words.

"That'd be for any other normal person, but I ain't a normal person, I'm a Strider, you know that." Dave tried to not think too hard; thinking too hard made his head hurt...

The troll got off Dave and sat up, the action itself taking a lot out of him.

"Fine then. It never happened." He turned and left the room, honestly what did he expect? Dave to return his feelings?

"..." Karkat wanted to go and see if Dirk was alright, but He didn't want to leave Dave either. Fucking hell. Dave cringed a bit, trying to figure out what he should have done to get through that situation better. Nothing came to mind and he groaned in annoyance and flopped onto the bed. Karkat yelped as Dave flopped back, he was unsure what to do anymore.

Dave flinched slightly at making Karkat startled. "Sorry... and sorry about all that, um..."

"... N… no problem... you probably want to be alone... so I'll just." He stood up, using the bed as a support, he then began to walk out of the bedroom, slowly Dave simply watched as Karkat walked away, feeling slightly lonelier the further he went away. Why was everyone walking away? Since Dave wasn't going to stop him, Karkat left and made his way, literally crawling on the floor, to the lounge, pulling himself onto it.

Dave groaned in annoyance and rolled his face into the mattress so he could ramble about random things that were hurting his head by thinking without the other two hearing.

"Fuck what am I doing... was I supposed to say that? Fuck no, he didn't want you to say that you stupid fuck. Argh! Why did you have to say that?! Stupid... Just go out there and- no you idiot he's props mad at you still oh my god now what?! You gonna hole up in his room and stay there for the rest of your life? WIMP!" Dave was glad the mattress was listening and not Dirk or Karkat.

Dave eventually groaned and got up enough courage to drag himself off of the bed and to the door, pausing as he stood before it before opening and walking out into the hallway, poker face intact. He cast a small glance at Dirk and Karkat before disappearing off into his room without a word spoken.

Dave quickly slipped over to his bed and promptly face flopped onto it.

 _'You're being unfair.'_ Dirk’s mind whispered, but he was too busy focusing on the sting to notice. It wasn't like he'd had high hopes of success to begin with, but now he had none at all. He'd continue to be the brother, locking his feelings away where they wouldn't freak out Dave anymore.

He looked over at Karkat "Why're you here...?"

"... I wanted to give you two some space... but I thought you were in your bedroom..." His voice trailed off as he looked at the floor in shame.

"I'll be fine. Rejection just sucks."

"I can… go…" He barrel rolls off the lounge onto the floor

"It's not you. This would have happened anyway, you here or not."

"..." He was not used to people not telling him to go after a fight, in fact, he was expected to do it. "... Ok."

"Besides... with you here Dave can have someone else around rather than hi-his brother who's in love with... him..."

"Can... Can I be honest with you for a second..?" He asked, looking at Dirk from the floor. He looked down at Karkat and nodded. "I don't see the problem of you and him being partners. I mean, my... Lusii came from the same Great Lusus." He commented, before trying to get on the couch again, but not having the strength to

"For humans... two people from the same family loving each other like that is wrong..."

"... Oh" Karkat kind of felt hurt, in a sense. He didn't know what to say as a reply, so he just sighed.

"Honestly, I didn't expect for Dave to return my feelings... It still hurts..."

Karkat sat up, putting a hand on Dirk's Knee. "You both need sleep, fucking trust me on this one." Karkat tries again to haul his ass off the floor, succeeding and collapsing on the lounge next to Dirk

"You ok there?"

"Just fine." He replied, rolling so his back is on the couch.

Dirk sighed "I know... I... need to apologize to Dave."

"Yeah. I can support you from the couch."

He nodded in thanks and moved to Dave’s room, knocking quietly.

"Mmm?" Dave mumbled, rolling his head to the side to look at the door.

Dirk opened it hesitantly "It's... me. I thought we could have a one-on-one chat?"

Dave slightly panicked internally but he shoved that feeling down and far away, locked with chain and padlock behind a door. He simply nodded. "Sure."

He came in, and sat on the bed. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that."

Dave shrugged, still trying to think. "It's fine..." 'is it _really_ fine?' 'shut up brain.'

Dirk shook his head "No it's not. I pretty much forced myself on you..."

"And I could have shouted at you and told you to fuck off if I wanted to... but did I?"

"No... But you don't feel the same about it, do you?" He couldn't keep the slight pain out of his tone.

"Ngrnnnnnnnnnn... I don't know..." Dave didn't know, confused, fuck, what to do... Dirk sighed, mind translating 'I don't know' into rejection. Dave cringed, mentally and physically as he rubbed his face. "Just... a bit... confused..."

"Don't force yourself to try and feel the same way when you don't..."

"I'm not forcing anything. Just trying to sort things out is all..." The older boy stayed silent, not letting his hopes go up.

Karkat began to support Dirk on the couch, by laying there and fist pumping every so often. He really doesn't know what he is doing. Maybe he should make up a Strider Bingo card.

"I just need to talk to Jade or John or someone or something..." Dave grumbled, dragging himself out of his bed and over towards his computer.

"I... should leave you alone huh?" He was already up and out of the room before Dave could reply.

Karkat see's Dirk, but doesn't say anything. He was tired.

He went to his own room to flick on some music, setting his headphones on his ears&

Dave quickly logged into his pesterchum, grumbling in annoyance and quickly beginning to pester Jade.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> Ash: its at times like these when i wonder why I have word documents called 'asfiafjaifawf' and 'asfagaewgagawwfwq' and 'bluhsakjigoheasrgv' on my desktop :/ is that normal?  
> Bec: Yes  
> Bec: *Lying*  
> Ash: oh it is on bec!  
> Bec: Bring it titwaffle~ :P  
> Ash: thats alright  
> Ash: thats ok  
> Ash: youre gonna pump my gas someday  
> Bec: Sorry, I can't put gas in camels, they need water~  
> Ash: no wonder you can't put it in yourself.  
> Bec: I don't need to fodndle the water down the animals throat, thats the owners job.  
> Bec: Are we Kismesisizing?  
> Ash: not if you dont want to  
> Bec: I could do with a Kismesis ; )  
> Bec: *Poor Gem*  
> Gem: pffft  
> Ash: heuheuheu  
> Bec: Heu heu heu?  
> Ash: my laugh  
> Ash: get used to it  
> Gem: I'm more amused with the sudden kisses everywhere in the RP XD  
> Ash: yessssssss  
> Bec: xD  
> Bec: I am that tired that all I can do is laugh and nothing comes out of my mouth  
> Ash: lol  
> Bec: Way to go Karks  
> Ash: fight me bec  
> Ash: i dare you  
> Ash: i fucking dare you  
> Bec: I can touch you with the tip of my tit and you will explode from the sheer awesomeness I am, my powers I harness and the fact i need to piss.  
> Ash: motherfucker please  
> Ash: im fabulous  
> Bec: Also I don't know what I just said  
> Ash: hah!


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Moar Pesterlog!!!! :D

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] --

TG: jade

TG: jadey

GG: Oh hey Dave!

TG: ihgkfhdzyhujfgrlkh help

TG: icantdowordsfuck

GG: What's up dave? :o

TG: everything

TG: remember me telling you about that troll?

GG: uhmm oh yes! I remember!

TG: we took him to the hospital cause he like fainted

GG: :o!

TG: and i left roxy and rose with dirk

TG: alone

GG: What happened? D:

TG: karkats fine

TG: he got better i think

TG: thats not the problem

GG: What could possibly be worse? :o

TG: dirk

TG: i was helping karkat back to our place

TG: stuff and that

TG: and dirk kissed me idkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkfajskajfkanfaknnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnwhattodofuck

GG: oh deary me :o

TG: what doooooooooooo

GG: this is a right pickle

GG: I'm sure everything will go right, I think!

TG: you dont get it hes my bro of course you dont get it youre on an island in the middle of no where with jake omg i need to talk to someone else about this errrrrrrrrrrrrr

GG: Jake... hmmm I wonder where he has gotten off to I haven't seen him for the last few hours!

TG: he took you hunting last i remember

TG: can i talk to him

TG: maybe he can help

GG: He'll be back sometime soon.

TG: okay thanks

GG: I can hear faint gunshots.

TG: ok good

TG: thanks for that i guess

TG: even if half that conversation involved me rambling to you

\-- gardenGnostic [GG] is now an idle chum! --

TG: oh…

\-- golgothasTerror [GT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] --

GT: By Jove that was a good trip!

TG: mhm

TG: im sure it was

TG: can i talk to you for a second

TG: or a few

TG: idk

GT: Should've seen me tackle a few beasties and show them fistycuffs!

TG: i can imagine

TG: can i talk to you

GT: What about chum, spot of adventuring got you in a hussle? Might be able to show you a few moves!

TG: no its about dirk

GT: I saw the poor fella is having a nasty day, had a quick checkaroo of jade's chat

TG: yes

TG: you know the situation

TG: any tips or am i all alone

GT: Dirk must have some moves to kiss you with his fist, I heard you held it out against him pretty well!

TG: what are you talking about

GT: Oh Dave, it's nothing to be embarrassed about, there comes a time when every guy feels the painful kiss of another mans fist

GT: Or woman’s in my case, Jade has quite a punch when she's angry whooee!

TG: ...

TG: you dont get it

TG: he actually kissed me

TG: how hard is that to understand

GT: Whoa there chap! You mean the real deal, the familial affection? Nothing to be worried about, purely platonic I assure you. Jade gives me a kiss on the forehead before I head out!

TG: dirk kissed me

TG: on the lips

TG: with his lips

TG: think about that for a second

TG: …

TG: you there?

GT: What what chap? Sorry some beast was making a cacophonous racket outside

TG: dirk

TG: kissed

TG: me

GT: Oh....Oh my!

TG: you know what

TG: no

TG: youre not gonna help

GT: I'm sure I can still provide some method of problem sleuthing to you!

TG: what do i do then

TG: what do i do

GT: I say you take it right to the source and rough him up a bit! Show that rascal you mean business

TG: ...

TG: yeah ok thanks for the advice

TG: that really shed some light on things

GT: Glad I could help chap

TG: excuse me while i log off and promptly facekeyboard

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased being pestering by golgothasTerror [GT] --

Dave quickly logged off and facekeyboarded.

Karkat curled up and shivered. Gog, he liked snuggling last night. Gog damn it. Dirk pulled off his headphones as he realised how freaking cold it was, so he walked out of his room and turned the generator on to warm up the apartment a little.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "Are you back yet? *Intentionally being a dickhead* - Bec".  
> timaeusTestified changed the conversation topic to "No, this is a thief doing a slow, casual theft.".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "*Waves at thief* Hai~".  
> timaeusTestified changed the conversation topic to "XP".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "Onto Business. Ash get your ass on heeeere~".  
> timaeusTestified changed the conversation topic to "*Ash summoning call* Matesprites!".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "*Ash summoning call* Matesprites! – Gem MAAAAAAATESPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITS! - Bec".  
> turntechGodhead [] joined chat.  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "MATEPSRITS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!".  
> timaeusTestified changed the conversation topic to "It worked holy shit! XD".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! >:I ~ Ash".


	14. Chapter 14

Dirk moved out to the lounge, checking up on the troll. "You know, you can just grab a blanket. We won't care."

"Can I…" He wanted to ask to snuggle, but now wasn't the time. Damn it "N…Never mind…"

"No, seriously. Is there anything you want?"

"Sn…ugg…le?" Gog, he was so fucking pathetic right now, and he hated himself for it.

He shrugged, "Sure," and sat down beside Karkat, and figured he could tease Dave a little. _'I wonder if he'll get jealous.'_

Karkat moves to Dirk, snuggling into his skinny, but warm body. "I... was dubbed anorexic..." He whispered, setting himself into him.

He just held him close. "You could relate to me huh?" It felt nice, having a warm body to hold close. He laid his head on Karkat's feeling somewhat more relaxed. _'Bet you wish it was Dave'_ A part of his mind hissed.

 _'Shut up, Dave has made his feelings clear.' 'You still want him though. You want to kiss him again, hold him close, love him in a way tha brothers shouldn't~'_ Fuck, why did that part sound like Roxy? That was all kinds of weird...

He heard Dave moving, and froze. _'Get up and smooch him'_ his inner Roxy screeched

Dave still had his face on the keyboard, trying to think properly.

Dave let out a small grumble upon noticing that neither John nor Jane was online. He dragged himself to his bed and promptly flopped onto it, face first, trying to think of what to do... What is there even _to_ do in a situation like this?

Dave was slightly suspicious when he couldn't hear any noise from outside his room and he turned his head to look at the door. Curiosity got the best of him and he dragged himself out of his seat and opened the door, looking around.

Dave internally grimaced when he saw Dirk and Karkat curled up together. But he quickly looked away, over towards the kitchen and walking past the lounge the two occupied, grabbing a packet of crisps and eating it in the kitchen, out of view.

Dave remained in the kitchen, eating as slowly as he could, prolonging the walk back to his room where he will have to see Dirk and Karkat lounging together.

He looked into the kitchen with concern, was Dave really so awkward around him now?

Dave looked up, pokerfaced. "What do you want?" He kept the sting out of his voice, thankfully.

"Are you ok? You're acting weird..." He made to get up, aiming to interrogate Dave

"I'm fine, just trying to think things out is all..." Dave said, it was only half true...

Dirk walked in anyway. "You obviously aren't. I'm still your brother Dave. And I'll be your brother before any sort of romantic figure."

Dave nodded, continuing to eat his crisps, still a bit confused. "Ngggg. It’s just difficult…"

"I know. I'm split into two minds. The one that wants to be your brother and the other that sounds like Roxy that wants to make out with you." Oh shit, brain, why did he say that?

Dave was caught between surprise and disgust, but he wasn't that disgusted, just confused, god these feelings were confusing. Dave simply nodded at Dirk's words anyways.

"Shit, sorry Dave, that just slipped out! If it means anything, Your lips are really nic- NO, NO, NO."

Dave blinked a few times, looking at Dirk for a few seconds before smirking, feeling like he had the upper hand in this, calming down a bit more. "Heh."

He groaned and hit his palm against his head "Stop hitting on your brother…" He muttered to himself.

Dave offered the bag to Dirk. "How's Karkat doing?" He asked, purposely changing subject.

"He's cold, and wanted snuggles."

"What's wrong with having…" Karkat quietened as he snapped back into reality and the situation at hand. "...Sorry"

Dirk bit his lip. "I know you don't want to, but we have to… talk about this situation…"

"I know, you want to go first?"

"Before that… Is there anything you wanna ask...?"

"Do... you want me to… go?" Karkat skittishly asked. He moved so he was standing in the doorway of the Kitchen "I'll just…" He absconds deep within the apartment, not wanting to be found.

Dave shrugged. "Not really... What about you? Anything you want to ask?"

 _'Your heart's gonna get broken'_ his mind whispered. "No... The only thing I really wanna ask, you probably don't have an answer for yet..."

"Mhm, then what do you want to talk about?"

"How do you feel about me liking you like that? Not your feelings personally, but how... do you think this'll affect us...?"

"Right now I think I'm fine with whatever happens..." Dave replied, actually meaning it amazingly.

"I can't trust myself around you... right now, I really want to kiss you Dave."

"I'm fine with it, I trust you." Dave replied, trying to be calm and cool, not to bothered, so far it's... working?

He inched a little closer "Can... I?"

Dave shrugged, literally not sure. "Dunno."

Dirk moved back, not being able to completely mask his disappointment.

"That wasn't a no..." Dave added on quickly. "That was an _'I'm not sure, haven't had much experience with it'_ obviously..."

Dirk still looked unsure "But... do you _want_ experience with kissing your brother?"

Dave shrugged. "There's the 'I dunno' bit." Dirk stayed quiet, not really willing to move to kiss his brother... "You can do what you want, I'm willing right now, got nothin' else to do anyways." Dirk seemed to take that as slight encouragement and stepped forwards, slowly pushing his head closer to Dave's. Dave moved the packet of crisps to the side and out of the way, looking at Dirk curiously, waiting.

Karkat is watching from above, in the air ventilation system. He saw everything happening and it was interesting to see Dave cave in like he did. "They…" He mutters to himself as he continues to watch them. "Maybe I shouldn't… be…" He sighed and shook his head, looking down at them again.

Dirk was almost touching Dave's lips, before pulling back. "I ca-can't..."

What... He's hesitating? Karkat was slightly shocked as he leaned into the peek hole.

Dave nodded, relaxing a small bit. "It's fine." He offered a small smile to Dirk, trying to reassure him.

He shook his head "N-No, how can I kiss you, when I don't know how you feel?"

Dave slumped slightly, still confused about his own feelings. "It's there it's just... it's been kept down and bringing it back up takes more than a second."

Dirk closed his eyes "You don't have to be nice... I'm expecting a rejection anyway"

"I'm not rejecting you."

Dirk looked up in surprise at Dave who continued eating crisps like nothing happened. Dirk gave an annoyed scowl before jerking Dave forward into a closed-mouth, hard kiss.

Dave was slightly surprised by this, hands useless till he held onto Dirk's sides, eyebrows furrowed together, eyes still open behind his shades but he made a little movement of his lips back.

He broke off the kiss, letting Dave go quickly and preparing to spew apologies out of his mouth (again).

"Don't say anything." Dave cut in.

"But..."

"Don't, it's fine."

"How… did it feel…?"

Karkat watches from above, watching everything taking place, staying immensely still so he doesn't disturb then before he decided to slide out of the air vent, moving out of the room and sinking into a hiding spot he had sort out. He knew what he was going to do in the near future, avoid the humans. As far as Karkat was concerned, interrupting on newly Matesprit couples was the worst thing to ever do, it is the reason why fatalities and homicide rates are too god damn high. Instead, he was going to give them all the space they needed.

"Meh, I've had better." He jokes, smirking at Dirk.

"Guess I better practise then."

Dave snorted. "Did you not even hear the sarcasm literally dripping from my words?"

"I know. Hey, Karkat! You can come out of hiding now!"

"Oh my god..."

Nope, Karkat is not going to come out of hiding, he is actually heading out of the apartment. He didn't want to interrupt them, except he couldn't get the door open from the ground

"Karkat, where the hell are you?" Dirk rolled his eyes "I'll go find him" He headed out to look through the apartment.

He managed to stand up, using the door knob as support before opening the door, tumbling out into the hallway and closing the door behind himself.

Dave still had to try to sort out his feelings...

He shuffled out of the kitchen after finishing his snack, rubbish in the bin for once. He simply flopped down onto the couch, trying to relax his body even though his mind was racing. Dave found Dirk was away for too long and went out of the apartment, walking to the elevator and getting inside, heading down to the lobby. 'God I hate that elevator music...' He thought, tapping his foot.

The doors of the elevator finally opened and Dave looked around the lobby, unable to see Dirk or Karkat, he walked outside of the building.

He began walking down the street looking down alleyways in search of Karkat and/or Dirk. "Karkat?! Dirk?!" He had resorted to calling out their names now, becoming seriously worried, hands fidgeting so he hid them in his pockets. Dave began walking the other way from the building. "Dirk?! Karkat?!"

Rounds into an alleyway. "Karkat! Dirk! Why the hell are you out here?!" He hissed, stalking over to the two, bothered and annoyed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~*BONUS*~  
> Dirk gave an annoyed scowl before Jerking Dave forward into a closed-mouth, hard kiss*  
> timaeusTestified changed the conversation topic to "GO home *".  
> timaeusTestified changed the conversation topic to "YOu are drunk".  
> carcinoGeneticist changed the conversation topic to "The kiss is a Star though -kiss*-".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "Go drunk You are home ~ Ash".  
> timaeusTestified changed the conversation topic to "COnditions apply to that kiss".  
> turntechGodhead changed the conversation topic to "ShOuld we all talk like this nOw~? Ash".  
> timaeusTestified changed the conversation topic to "No, I'm just a quick-typing idiot".
> 
>  
> 
> Cliffhanger MWAHAHAAHA!


	15. Chapter 15

Dirk heard the door, and raced outside "Karkat, no! You can't be seen!" He ignores Dirk and crawls into the elevator, clicking the lowest numbered button and the elevator doors closed. Dirk groaned and raced to the stairs, practically jumping down them to beat the elevator.

"No Dirk" Karkat wheezed as he shifted himself so he was sitting on his ass

Dirk waited, trying to spot Karkat in the main lobby. "God damn it..."

Karkat appeared on the ground floor several minutes after getting the right button clicked. The doors opened and the room was immensely bright. "Fuck..." He gasped in awe

Dirk instantly moved to pick up Karkat, offering various excuses ("Sorry, he's a little groggy") and pushing to go back to his floor. "Idiot. You're not strong enough to be going out by yourself."

"No I cannot be with you anymore!" Karkat hissed, getting onto his feet

"And why not?"

"You two are MATESPRITS, I cannot interrupt!" He bluntly replied, crawling out of the way, away from Dirk

"What? Matespirits? For one thing, Dave hasn't returned my feelings, and Another, I'm not leaving you to fend for yourself" He picked up the troll again.

Karkat began to kick Dirk, struggling out of his grip and somehow landed on his feet. "No it… it is for the best." The human rolled his eyes, the kicks the elevator door, knocking him off balance and leaving him clinging to the wall. "... This is not my place." The troll said bluntly before turning away, to leave, limping severely.

Dirk reacted unconsciously, spinning the troll around and pinning him against a wall "I'm not letting you go" he growled softly.

Karkat managed to shift his weight and spin around, pinning Dirk on the wall instead. Dirk couldn’t help as his eyes widened when he was slammed against the wall, Holy shit... "I can and I fucking will." His teeth ground his sharp together. "You. Don't. Own. Me." Feeling that his point was put across, he let go of Dirk, moving away from him.

 _'That was pretty hot'_ Inner Roxy commented idly. Dirk shook his head, stop that. Inner Roxy would make him a whore or something. "Karkat wait, I have a message from Dave for you." Karkat turned away, limping towards the door- wait Dirk wants to talk. He stopped. Dirk walked forwards and put a hand on Karkat's shoulder. "Turn around; I want to say it to your face. Not your back."

Karkat flinched at the touch, jumping to face Dirk "HAPPY?" He snarled, his voice spitting out the venom of when they met.

"Very. Now, you've got the wrong idea. Dave and I aren't Matesprits. We can't be. Wanna know why?" Karkat honestly could not care less. He has been here for too long now. The spies would be lurking around, closing in on his position. Dirk sighed, careful to keep the hurt out of his tone "He was practicing kissing on me for you."

"..What" The troll kept his face expressionless, but uncertainty grew within him

"He wants to be romantically involved with you. Haven't you wondered why he teases you so much? It's because he's trying to court you." Stop hurting heart, this was for Dave.

"I have barely been here for 40 time periods. That is not enough time for him to be romantically interested in me." Karkat turned around spitefully, limping towards the door.

"You mean you don't believe in love at first sight? Because that's what it looks like to me. I'm doing this for Dave."

"Yet you love him yourself. Don't do it for him or anyone else. Do what you need to do for yourself to survive." Karkat muttered in reply as he leant against the door, turning back to face Dirk. "No. I do not believe in Love at first sight... I don't even know what that is." He opened the door.

"Being with you would make him happy. I'm willing to step aside for you… that's how much I love him."

He shook his head. "I will not let you do that." He deadpanned.

"What was it you said 'I can and I fucking will'? I believe that applies to this situation as well."

"Alright. Go a head. I am gone." He finally replied as he left the building, closing the door and into the street.

Dirk quickly followed him. "Karkat. No. Stay." He ignored Dirk as he limped down the street. Dirk raced forward, an odd feeling down his spine. "Karkat, it doesn't feel safe out here!"

He continue to ignore Dirk as he turned into an alleyway and immediately slashed a hooded figure with his sickle, as he entered strife mode.

He ran to catch up, skidding to a stop as he saw the figure leaking blood. "Kar-what?" The figure was already screeching in pain and it soon took off, staggering slightly before it disappeared.

Karkat dipped his fingers into the blood on his sickle before bringing the liquid into light. "Violet. He was Eridan. He didn’t have his gun." Karkat snarled.

"Eri-who?" Dirk watched, fascinated yet horrified. "Could there be more around?" His tone turned threatening. "Is Dave in danger?"

"Probably, go and find him." Karkat deadpanned in reply. He was lying, he just wanted to leave.

"But you don't have a weapon."

Dirk smirked a little as he pulled out his sickle. "I don't have a weapon?" He swings his sickle around.

He rolled his eyes "A long range one. You mentioned guns. A sickle isn't going to do you any good against those."

The troll growled "Every blood colour has a specific weapon they mush have. One uses their fists."

He sighed. "Why do you want to go alone?"

"…I don't… want them to kill you." He confessed. That part was truthful as he stood up from the body and went his way.

"We don't want them to kill you either! Do you really think they'll leave the humans who helped the mutant blood alone?"

"They are my fucking problem, my fucking concern and not yours! You are innocent civilians, of another specie, interrupting in our war!" He yelled, loud enough for his voice to be heard in the area. “They will cull you both! And I will not let that happen!"

"I thought you didn't care." Dirk’s tone was steely. He already cared about Dave way too much, and every word Karkat said, his instincts latched on to and made him worry.

"Fuck you." Karkat's tone was monotone, lacked ay real emotion.

"I'm being honest; do you really think they'll let us go?"

"NO THEY WON'T. THEY WOULD HUNT YOU DOWN AND TORTURE YOU TO GET TO ME. AND DO YOU WANT TO FUCKING KNOW WHY?" His voice became shaky as he looked at Dirk "Because you are the only fucking thing close to family I have. I want to cherish that."

"And giving yourself up is any better? What if after you're dead they kidnap Dave for being involved with helping you? What then, huh?!"

"THAT WILL NOT HAPPEN! I WILL GLADLY GIVE MYSELF UP FOR YOU. AND. DAVE. MY BODY IS ALREADY RIGGED; I AM JUST JUSTIFYING MY DEATH."

Dirk looked down "What if I said I'm already way too attached to you...?" His voice was soft, almost reluctant in his admission.

"I would say that was a lie. You are attached to Dave. Just go back to the human realm." His voice was calm, soft, but demanding.

"I wouldn't lie about that!"

"Your heart is in another castle Dirk, and that castle is not me." He finally said before putting his sickle away and limping out of the alleyway

Dirk let a small shout of frustration out. "I can't just choose who not to love!" He looked at Dave in surprise, eyes looking watery.

He let out a shaky sigh "Let's go back Dave..."

"Nrrrrrrrr!" Dave grumbled in annoyance and glowered at Dirk. "Will the you just get back to the apartment already? The doctor said Karkat shouldn't be outside! I need to go find him before he gets in trouble!"

Dirk pulled at Dave's arm. "He's made up his mind, we should go Dave..." Dave stood still. "Dave, c'mon. Let's go home..."

He pulled away from Dirk slightly. "I need to find Karkat to bring him back home!"

"Dave, he's run away!"

Dave fidgeted a bit but hid his hands in his pockets. "Why did he go...? He has no where to run to for help..."

Dirk sighed, rubbing at his eyes. "He went that way." He pointed in the direction Karkat had gone.

He glanced at Dirk. "You coming?"

"No, I'm gonna meet you guys back at the apartment." Dave paused, looking at Dirk before nodding, turning around and heading off in the direction Karkat had disappeared in. Dave still fidgeted restlessly as he tried to find Karkat, looking down all the streets and alleyways he passed by that Karkat might have gone down.

Dave wasn't sure exactly where to look but he mainly focused on the darker places; alleyways. Behind dumpsters, anywhere a troll could and would hide.

"Karkat!" Dave called after having not seen sight of the troll yet. Shit, it's gonna get dark pretty soon... He glanced about, noting the number of other people was diminishing. He hurried on faster. "Karkat!"

Dave winced at the sound of screams, suddenly finding himself running to try and find Karkat, eyes wide and head twisting to look down and around everywhere. The scream was short but it gave Dave enough of a direction to head in Karkat's general direction. As an afterthought he drew his specibus out, the sword soon held in his hand as he pointed it backwards to make running faster and run less of a risk of accidentally stabbing himself or the innocent passersby.

"KARKAT!" He shouted, seriously worried and not caring what other people thought of him as he ran past before turning round a corner, stopping upon seeing the fight before him, frozen in place just staring.

* * *

Dirk sighed, and walked back slowly. He'd tried to talk to Karkat, but maybe Dave would have more luck...

He lazily walked towards the apartment complex, focus turned inwards rather than his surroundings. "Wonder how Dave's going..."

 _'What are you doing, idiot? Leaving your brother to look for Karkat alone when he's being hunted?!'_ He stopped, eyes widening.

He hurried back to where he'd last seen them, heart hammering. "I've gotta help them..." Shit, he was lost. The sound of the city was disorientating him.

"Dave? Karkat?" He continued to run, trying to find them. He had a feeling that they were in pretty bad trouble...

He heard the (very) faint sounds of fighting, and figured that he'd head that way. He had to slow down, all his running around had exhausted him somewhat.

He heard yelling, and the ring of metal. "Dave! Karkat?"

He finally saw them after following Dave's voice, and skidded to a stop, eyes widening. "Holy fuck." he gasped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (clifhangers yesssssss~ sorry but not sorrrrrrrry!~)  
> (Warning long notes filled with random shit!)
> 
> ~*BONUS*~  
> Bec: You might need a pair of pants that aren't two sizes too small, since you wanna hate fuck me, your camel toe'd vag-boner's showing  
> Bec: Fuck message  
> Bec: *we need to get you bigger pants as yours now are two sizes...  
> Bec: <3


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I updated late DX so sawryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy~

Karkat continued to limp, tears beginning to form in his eyes. He walked a block or two before collapsing on the pavement, not being able to go any further. He laid there, for a long minute, sobbing to himself. He couldn't think straight and nothing was working for him.

"Fuck... Why am I so fucking weak..." He muttered as he was hugging the ground. "... I am so fucking sorry" He slammed his fist onto the ground, repeatedly, until his hand began to severely hurt. He laid there, for several moments before he could feel footsteps come closer to him, he shivered in anticipation.

"You catch on fast don't you?" Karkat muttered as he lifted his face off the ground. He knew that the figure that had approached him was probably looking for him, he knew it without looking. He silently cursed at himself for being such an idiot, staying in one location for so long.

"Just a little Karbro, butcha know what this means right?" The figure spoke, kicking Karkat in the ribs.

"Fuck you." The troll spat as he nursed his new wounds that were acquired.

"You can do that later, if you survive what is gonna be happenin’ bro." The Highblood remarked as he squatted down. "Ya know you'd be the best mutant on the run for fuck knows how long man, even Condy is impressed on that one. _’Pity he ain't a highblood'_ she commented." The slightly groggy troll smirked deviously as he pulled on the mutant troll’s hair. "I can tall you everything but you know, she can tell ya 'rself"

"Yeah," Karkat gasped "I bet she'd like the satisfaction of having me suffer while she sits there in her fucking throne bossing all of us around, as if we're all servants. And watching my fucking blood bleed out of me." He snarled as his eyes turned foul.

"Heck yeah, you know it." The troll replied as he let go of Karkat's hair and kicked him in the gut several times, before drawing his clubs. Seriously, he was a motherfucking clown or something.

Karkat screamed in pain from the kicks as he pushed himself up from the ground, his sickle drawn and blood tricking out of his mouth again. He could hear Dave's voice in the background, but survival was more necessary here.

"We're fighting hmm? Gonna have fucking fun with this you know Karbro." The sadistic and grotesque grin on the face of the Highblood was all that was needed to tell how much fun the troll was going to have with this.

"Gamzee. Fuck you for not sticking to your beliefs!" Karkat finally roared as he dove towards Gamzee, slashing his sickle impressively at the Highblood.

Gamzee easily managed to avoid all of Karkat's attacks with ease with his clubs, before delivering a few of his own. The Mutant was not going down that easily, he blocked Gamzee's attacks with pain filled and exhausted movements with his sickle before laying a few direct kicks to Gamzee.

The kicks hit the middle of his chest. Gamzee stumbled back a few paces before arming himself again. "More determined this time-" He stopped himself and calmed a little when he heard an unfamiliar voice, turning around to face the voice’s source. "Human."

"Fuck," Karkat muttered underneath his breath as he shuddered a little. He had failed again.

Dave quickly pulled his hand before himself, blade poised in a defensive position, one foot before the other, prepared to counter or to attack, depends if this creature attacks him or not.

"That's me." He grunted out, shuffling forwards a bit.

"You actually meddled with those of your own blood colour. This I was not informed on." Gamzee's grotesque smile returned "BUT IT DOESN'T MOTHERFUCKING CHANGE THE FACT THAT YOU WILL BE MOTHERFUCKING CULLED FOR TRETCHARY AND HERACY MOTHERFUCKER!" Gamzee shouted as he charged towards Karkat and clubbing him several times in the ribs.

He was caught unguarded, as if it all happened in several heartbeats. He felt an extraordinary pain in his abdomen and collapsed to the ground, his sickle at his side.

Dave quickly went to offensive, keeping quiet as he raced forward on his toes and swung his sword towards the larger troll, aiming to maybe come into contact with an arm or, even better, his abdomen. Anything to get the troll to leave Karkat alone would be useful.

"That was too motherfucking-" He turned around and blocked the attack from the human blonde haired possible male, it was too hard to tell considering how girly his appearance was. "-Oh? OH? SO WE HAVE A ROUND TWO? AN ENCORE MOTHERFUCKERS! THE MURTHFUL MESSIAHS GIFTED THIS TO US TODAY!" He chanted as he pushed the human away from him with sheer strength.

"…ave…run…" Karkat muttered as he clutched to his sickle, his grip around it tightening.

"Hey bro I'm gonna need some help over here!" Dave called upon recognizing Dirk's voice. He took a few wary steps back, sword still angled towards the large troll and Dave couldn't help but worry about how strong his opponent was, wondering if he might even be able to defeat him if Dirk doesn't arrive soon enough.

"YOU SHALL NOT USE THE TERM 'BRO' YOU FILTHY EXCUSE FOR A MOTHERFUCKING BEING!" Gamzee roared as he lunged towards the shorter, less experienced human, clubbing at him.

Dave narrowly avoided the attack, using his sword to deflect the club to the side.

Dirk saw red. His sword was in his hand, and he bowled into the troll's side. "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY BROTHER!"

Karkat didn't move, just watched the fight from his current position. He knew Gamzee. He knew the Condesce. She would want to kill him. No one or but she will kill the troll responsible for a mutant's death.

Gamzee then proceeded to force away the younger human with a very unorthodox kick before approaching Dirk with a block of his clubs, before tossing a club into the air and pulling out a blow horn to blow in his ear. "HONK HONK MOTHERFUCKERS!"

Dirk winced and stumbled away, his ear ringing. "Shit!"

Gamzee then proceeded to club away at Dirk several times, catching the club he threw into the air and effectively pushing both humans away from Karkat."You AIN'T GONNA SAVE THE MOTHERFUCKER NOW." Gamzee said before blowing the air horn again.

Dave grunted, jaw gritted tight as he was kicked before slashing his sword at one of the clubs, aiming to push it out of the way before he jumped forward in reach and aimed an arc of his blade towards the troll's chest, eager to make his opponent feel pain like he had caused.

"Stop blowing that thing!" Dirk swore he was going deaf; the ringing in his ears was getting louder. Gamzee's thin and tall frame made it easy for him to avoid most of the attacks Dave unleashed, and when Gamzee spat into Dave's face, he kicked him back once again."I CAN DO WHATEVER I FUCKING WELL WANT TO-" Karkat managed to get himself up onto his feet and jumped onto the Highblood Trolls back.

"Goodnight motherfucker!" He hissed angrily.

Dirk shook his head to try and get the ringing out; the clubbing he'd endured hadn't helped.

Dave growled and stumbled backwards in shock before staring angrily at Gamzee before seeing a small trickle of purple from somewhere behind the troll. He paused, confused.

"Heeheheheheee... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!" Gamzee laughed out loud, or lol'd for short, before spitting blood out of his mouth. "Well fucking done Karbro." He collapsed onto the ground.

And in Gamzee's back, was Karkat's sickle.


	17. (IUPDATEDAGAINBEHAPPY)

Dirk walked unsteadily over to Dave "You ok? I guess a run around the city isn't in my energy range anymore..."

Karkat collapsed onto the ground, gasping for air. "Fuck..."

Dave still held his sword tight in his hands, looking about as if expecting more people to come try to kill Karkat.

Dirk sat beside his brother, slightly less winded than Karkat. "Honestly, trying to fight just after I've recovered from Anorexia? No wonder I'm so tired." Dave turned to glower at the two, jaw still locked tight, breathing harshly though his nose. Karkat coughs a little before getting up to his knees. He refused to look at either of them, as if he had failed them.

Dirk rubbed at his head, "Sorry Dave." Dave didn't trust his words yet, he just groaned in annoyance, anger and pain simultaneously as he took a few steps to the side and leaned against a wall.

"We should go home." The older of the three said as he got up and offered a hand to Karkat.

Several moments went past as the troll saw the hand hovering there and he shunned away from it. ".. I... Can…'t." Dave looked at Karkat, eyes thankfully hidden as he glared at the troll. Dirk took his hand back, just so he could pick up the troll instead. "Dirk... please... no." He begged, "I don't want you.... or Dave... h-hurt." Well at least his intentions are noble. Dave was still trying to find the right words to say and the self control to say them properly.

"Too bad, we're going back." He looked towards Dave "You coming?"

"..." Karkat couldn't move. He was in so much pain now from everything, that he was literally a cripple on the floor. Dave nodded, pushing himself from the wall and shuffling over to help Dirk with Karkat.

"At least that troll didn't hit me in the head. I probably would have gotten a concussion or something..." He started to walk back to the apartment complex, keeping a steady pace.

"W...ait." Dave paused, looking at Karkat curiously. "I.....m ... so ... sorry." He pushed his words out "…I... I didn't want you to be killed... either of you."

"Shh, it's ok. We made it."

"You're a princess, I swear it, Karkles..." Dave grumbles, but it's a bit light-hearted and not really blameful.

Dirk holds a hand out in front of him, it’s shaking a lot and covered in several bruises.

"We'll take care of you."

"Let's just get home and rest, seriously, when will I ever have a normal day again?" Dave let out a small sigh and shook his head, only half meaning what he said.

Dirk walked into the lobby, ignoring the looks of the others, except if they were particularly harsh, then he glared right back.

"…mmm…" Karkat mumbled in reply.

Finally, he stopped outside their door. "Welcome home Kar." He smiled softly.

Dave managed to leave the apartment door unlocked, smart one dumb one. He sighed in annoyance before simply pushing it open.

"...home?" Karkat was genuinely confused. He never actually understood what an actual 'Home' was.

"Yeah, you're one of us now" He set Karkat down on the couch.

Dave grunted slightly and stretched his arms above his head, leaning back a bit before shaking the rest of his body, trying to relax his still tense muscles.

"..." He thought about it for several moments before looking at Dirk with a sceptical look "What?"

"Why am I one of you and why am I home?"

"Because we care stupid."

Dave nodded, looking slightly tired as he meandered into the kitchen to try and find something to give to himself and the other two to eat.

"…Oh... Thank you." His words were slow, but eventually they pushed themselves out

Dirk sat beside him and stage whispered "I give you permission to look at my brother's ass."

Dave turned his head, not enough for them to know he was listening as he smirked, face looking the other way so it was hidden. He secretly thought this was awesome.

"Are you playing matchmaker with me?" Karkat replied, surprisingly his voice wasn't outright yelling or crying out, his voice was monotone.

He smiled "I'm just teasing. Unless you actually do wanna, then ogle away. It's a nice ass."

Dave pulled open the cupboard, didn't really find anything sticking out, went to the fridge, nothing, bending over to look in the freezer- chips maybe?

"Where else do you think I am fucking looking?" He snarled as he snuggled into Dirk, wanting the contact he was rejected hours ago.

"I dunno, his hips maybe? Lips? Eyes? I'll never know." He snuggled Karkat back a little.

Yes chips, Dave decided after a long while (on purpose) and dragged the bag out, cutting the thing open with a knife from a drawer and dumping the frozen sticks onto a tray, oven turned on and left to heat up as Dave stretched again, his arms and back were killing him.

"I do not know what is so interesting about his butt." Karkat replied. He clearly is missing the point here.

"It's nice to look at. Look at it, and tell me how it makes you feel."

"Is it polite to grab onto it..?"

"I'm sure he'd like that. Go do it if you're curious."

"I really can't move though." Karkat replied. He was stiff, sore and fucking tired. "Can I ask a question?"

"Go on."

"Can we all... sleep together in one bed again? I liked that."

He smiled gently, "Sure, and you can grab Dave's ass then too."

"Okay... Cool."

Dirk pulled Karkat close, still eyeing Dave's body out of the corner of his eye. The troll curled to Dirk's touch, wrapping his arms around the man's torso. He pulled his attention away from Dave. Bad Dirk, no ogling your brother.

The oven was finally warm enough and Dave opened it up, hovering over and leaning forward to put the tray inside without burning himself. He checked it once before shutting the oven door.

"D...irk I'm hungry...” He muttered without thinking. He knew Dave was probably gone to go and get food. Fuck he was so stupid.

"Dave's cooking. Don't worry." Dirk found his eyes trailing down the troll's body, pausing at the arms and the hips. He shook his head; nope, no ogling Karkat either. Karkat pulls back suddenly and takes his top off. It was too big on him and it was digging into his sore ribs in the embrace.

Dirk swallowed a sudden lump in his throat. "Uh, why'd you take it off?" Not that his hormones were complaining... or his mind.

"It is hurting... my stomach." He was slowly coming out of it, to the point where his words were slurring a little.

Dave set the timer for twenty minutes then walked out to the other two, pausing to look them over; topless Karkat and Dirk snuggling together on the couch. He simply raised an eyebrow but didn't bother questioning as he flopped down beside Karkat.

Oh fuck, cute boy overload. Dirk stood up. "I'm going to my room, call me when the food's done." he blurted out before absconding to his room.

Karkat falls onto the cushions of the lounge and doesn't realize he did until several moments later. "Ware 'id ... Irk go?"

Dave paused, thinking, then laughed, not bothering to answer Karkat just yet.

_'smooth. They'll never suspect a thing'_ Dirk’s mind sarcastically replied.

The troll pats around the lounge where Dirk was before sitting up, looking around and seeing Dave. "'ey" He then snuggled into Dave, without missing a beat. Dave lazily wrapped his arms around Karkat, managing to calm himself down enough to stop himself from shaking with laughter, just small chuckles now.

It really doesn't take long before Karkat falls asleep, he was deathly tired and clinging to Dave like a fucking magnet doesn't help. Dave is happy to lie there, eventually finding nothing to do and he moves a hand up, sliding it through the sleeping Karkat's hair.

"Zzz…" What do you expect to be said, he is asleep.

 

Dave himself was bad (and attractive) enough, adding Karkat to tha- whoa, ok. Surprisingly hot. He calmed himself down, pushing all Dave/Karkat thoughts from his mind. He walked out an- fuck, they were snuggling. There were those thoughts again. He tried to move around them, begging Dave not to comment on his flight.

Dave hasn't noticed Dirk yet, still stroking a hand through Karkat's slightly matted hair, detangling it as softly and least painfully as he could. He forgot what those horns were again and touched the tip of one curiously, again.

"Nnnmmgh ahh..." He gasped a little as Dave's hand touched it.

Oh, there was an odd feeling in his gut. Hot, unpleasant and aimed at Dave and/or Karkat (his feelings were too muddled to tell).

Dave raised an eyebrow at the noise, choosing to rub a finger on the smooth keratin as an experiment.

"...mmm yee...sss" He murmured a little.

The feeling grew. _'Why can't he be like that with you? Because you're his brother.'_ his mind hissed cruelly. He bit the inside of his mouth and moved into the kitchen. Dirk checked on the chips to distract himself from the two in the lounge. Maybe standing down was going to be more difficult than he thought...

Nope, he wasn't going to look, or think about them, or acknowledge that he may be (totally is) a little jealous. He was surprised they couldn't notice it. What frustrated him was that he didn't know which one he was jealous over.

 

"Why are you touching my horns?" Karkat bluntly asked, very politely as well.

Dave blinked; when did Karkat wake up? "Uh... because I wanted to? They aren't exactly normal to me, man..." He kept his voice quiet for no real reason.

"You are basically touching my human genital when you touch them like that. Unless you want a dirty mess everywhere, I suggest you to not touch them for this reason." He sternly said, sitting up from Dave.

Dave flinched away, removing his hands at those words. "Nnnnnnnn... nothing happened, ok? nothiiiiiiiiiiiiiing!" He denied, still a bit confused and, yes, weirded out.

"... Did you like touching them?"

Dave paused, thinking it over before shrugging noncommittally. "It's weird in a cool way. Human's don't have horns so it's a new experience to me basically."

Dirk walked out of the kitchen, trying to hide his hot feeling of jealousy. "He wants to touch your ass."

"I didn't ask how they-" He looked at Dirk for a split second.

Dave looked at Dirk. "What even...?"

"That's what we were talking about before. Now with that knowledge, have fun." He walked back to his room, internally beating his head with a stick.

He sat against his door, figuring that since it opened inwards him sitting there would delay one or both of them bursting into his room in anger.

"..."

"Alright." He sighed as he pulled himself away from Dave

"I don't get what is even going on. You two are weird..." Dave made sure to show no signs of sincerity in his words.

"Dirk was saying that you loved me, in a way of making me not leave her in the first place. I didn't believe him because... No one would ever feel such... a thing." He sighed.

"Why do you think that? Seriously, don't doubt yourself, you're just making yourself pathetic and I can't help but take pity on you when you look smaller than a baby, I mean seriously stop I'm going on a guilt rollercoaster here. Just scoot your butt back and snuggle again, it's on the house."

He hesitated for several moments, not sure whether he wanted to or not... Not after what Dirk just burst in saying. He felt sorry for the older man. "Maybe you should... talk to Dirk. He needs you now more than I do." It wasn't a lie, but it wasn't fully truthful either.

Dave paused, actually thinking it through for a moment before giving a grunt, shaking his head. "Ok, nope, why is there drama, I'm stuck trying to deal with you two who are literal magnets of danger and drama. I'm just going to go lie down and see if I can rest before some troll randomly swings through the window like some monkey on a guide wire and tries to lop my head off in a single swing of their crazy rainbow sword. 'Oh, is that Santa mummy?' says the poor innocent bystander child below. 'No, son, that is just a troll who murdered Dave Strider. Oh dear, he dripped on you, let me clean that off.' Dave rolled his head a bit and pulled himself up to standing, moving towards his room.

Well... that went well. "Fuck…" He shivered. Well, his wish isn't going to be granted any time soon, even though Dirk gave the OK on it.

The troll laid down on the lounge, the movement paining him. He really couldn't put up with this anymore. This was one of the reasons he tried to leave in the first place. He was just trying to help. Now the humans were using his issues against him. He felt sick in his stomach.

_'gotta own up for your stupid comment. Go on, get out there'_

Dirk heard Dave walking up the hallway and tensed, fearing the fists that... weren't... banging on his door? He snuck out, and saw Karkat on the couch. "Sorry. I screwed up big time..."

"No you didn't... I did." He sombrely replied.

He shook his head and sat beside him. "No. I let... my jealousy ruin it for you two... Things were going well."

"No.. It was my comment after you left."

He pulled the troll closer into a one armed hug. "Ok, we both fucked up."

Snuggles into the hug a little. "Alright... But I guess that sleep thing is out the window.."

"We can still ask, I'm sure he'd let you join him at least."

"... I..." Fuck _'HE JUST WANTED THE HUMANS TO BE HAPPY AGAIN LIKE THEY WERE WHEN HE GOT THERE AND FUCKING LEAVE THEM TO THEIR HAPPINESS, WHY WAS IT SO FUCKING DIFFICULT?'_ "I think he is pissed off at me... And I am tired" He yawned to justify his point. "Can… I sleep now...? With you?"

He smiled softly "Go ahead."

"...Yay…" Wait. Did he just say 'yay'?

He laid down so the troll was on his chest, holding him close. Karkat was so cute...

Karkat wrapped his arms around Dirk and snuggled into his chest, before closing his eyes. He nuzzled into Karkat's hair, happy that he seemed relaxed. He felt a small shiver run through his body, and figured he should have brought a blanket...

The troll eventually began to snore, shifting his head awkwardly. His horn was rubbing against Dirk who closed his eyes, and tried to sleep despite the troll stealing his body warmth. _'Idiot, should have brought a blanket'_

"...ng.." He muttered, in response to his horns contacting the fabric.

His mind fell into a doze, and he unconsciously placed a hand on Karkat's head as he slowly relaxed.

His hand was on his opposite horn, and because of Dirk's chest rising and falling, it effectively began to rub against his hand, the horn friction... Yeah.

 

Dave ignored Dirk's door completely and slid into his own room, phone being pulled out of a pocket and beginning to play some music loudly but not enough to bother Dirk, knowledge gained due to past experiences. He slipped over and practically flopped onto his bed, pausing there before lifting his upper half up, arching his back to stretch it out and try to loosen some tensed muscles.

After hearing a small crack Dave fell back down onto his bed, arms coming up and bordering the outline of his head as he let out a small sigh.

Dave wasn't even trying to sleep, he still had enough adrenalin pumping in his veins to keep him awake and he just lay there, head buried in the sheets of his bed, listening to the flow of music, counting a beat out in his head.

Dave seemed to relax after not hearing any noises indicating the two were coming in, but then furrowed his bro in confusion s to whether that is what he wanted to happen or not. He chose to ignore those feelings as quickly as they had appeared and decided to have a go at trying to fall asleep.

No luck, Dave's body is still a bit too hyped for it to relax enough to fall asleep and he gives a small huff before rolling over onto his back, arms resting on his sternum as he stared at the roof. Oh hey, look! There's a crack near the far wall, wonder if there are any more...

No more cracks, damn, now what Mr. Smarty Pants? He let out a small sigh, glancing about the room for a few seconds before his eyes fall back on his phone. He quickly checks for any new messages.

GG: you're terrible! XP

Dave snickered upon remembering what he last texted her. She was offline so he didn't bother replying to her, opting for waiting till she was online.

And just as he thought that, she came online. Dave blinked. _'Great, I forgot she is some kind of telepath or something'_ he thought.

 

GG: Daaaaavvvveeee!

TG: i fucking told you

GG: I wanna know if there's any improvements!

TG: its worse

TG: its so much worse

TG: can i ask you a question that involves three words

GG: What?

TG: can i or not

GG: Go on stupid!

TG: ok then

TG: brother or troll??????????

GG: ... huh?

TG: the trolls hot

GG: aaannndddd?

TG: i am living in a house with two guys who i think are hot

TG: what do

GG: Uh...

GG: try them both?

TG: but the other then be jealous and not understand and shit nad feel rejected

TG: they are worse than cats

TG: the things demand your attention

TG: constantly

GG: Maybe you need to sit them both down and explain!

TG: and need to be rescued

GG: wait, what?

TG: god i just got in a fight earlier today

TG: i cant do that shit

TG: no nope

TG: oh yeah

TG: forgot to tell you

TG: you know how i said karkat was a mutant

GG: uhuh...

TG: well turns out people want to kill him because hes a mutant and he has a whole mob chasing after him and i just had a run in with some crazy ass massive clown juggalo guy who tried to club me and dirk and karkat to death

TG: i dont want to do this anymore

TG: why cant i be normal

GG: Oh nooo, are you all ok?

TG: mhm

TG: my body hurts like a motherfucker sometimes though

TG: and my ears are still ringing with honks

GG: I still think you should talk to them both. Because no matter what you do one of them's gonna end up hurt! Unless...

TG: unless what

TG: dont hold back

GG: They're ok with you having them both

TG: ...........

TG: how do i even respond to that

GG: I'm curious, does your bro like-like the troll?

TG: i think

TG: they cuddle and all that shit

GG: Then... Maybe they won't be so against the idea ;D

TG: oh dear lord

TG: i think i need to talk to someone sane...

TG: is john on

GG: Mean Dave!

TG: shhhh

TG: only answers now

TG: is john on

GG: Well look at your chums, is he?

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] --

TG: hey john

TG: long time no see

EB: Hey Dave!

TG: no see of my red text for you and your blue text for me that is

EB: haha I get it!

TG: are you sane right now thoguh

TG: just answer that please

EB: Depends, what's the situation?

TG: dirk

TG: troll

TG: stufffffffffffff

Fuck, how can Dave even explain this to john? errrrrrrr...

GG: Bluuuh, fine, don't talk to me!

Whoops he forgot to close Jade’s chat box.

EB: Uh... Are you trying to tell me that your bro is making a move on the troll?!

TG: maybe but they were both ogling my butt while i was getting chips in the oven

TG: and dirk sort of kissed me

TG: twice

TG: and now the trolls hot

EB: Whoa

EB: whoa

TG: help me

EB: Uh...

EB: I dunno!

TG: brother or troll brother or troll uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh!!!

EB: Which one does your mind want?

TG: would i even talk to you about this if my mind had already chosen

EB: But... I thought you were being all weird about how your bro felt about you?

TG: but the troooooooooooooooooooooooooooooll

TG: hes tsundere

TG: ffffffffffff

EB: Try harder!

EB: I'm sure they've given you hints over who they want you to choose!

TG: what do bro what do theres dirk and theres karkat and theres dirk and they are just princesses that need saving from anything and everything and drama and i probs just avoided getting killed not even half an hour ago ffffffffffffff-

EB: Uh...

EB: let's focus on Dirk! Has he said anything to Karkat about you? I assume that Dirk is your bro and Karkat's the troll...

TG: yes omg why didnt i tell you that stuff

EB: what stuff?!

TG: you know TT right

EB: yeah...?

TG: and you know her sister TG

TG: drunk girl and smart girl

EB: omg yes!

EB: get to the point!

TG: theyre my cousins

TG: dont think i told you that bit

EB: wait- really?

TG: yeah and they only live a few blocks away

EB: What does this have to do with your problem though?

TG: this shit was stressing me out so much i literally had to get the two girls to come over and sort things out and roxy talked to dirk and i think she wormed into his head and thats why he kissed me???

TG: roxy = drunk girl

EB: Sooo you think his feelings aren't legit?

TG: but it could have been rose as well

TG: she did talk to him too

TG: they are evil i tell you

TG: but they are good as well somewhere deep down idk

EB: Still, do you think your bro doesn't actually like you 'like that'?

TG: oh with the way he kissed me i know he likes me 'like that' trust me

EB: You sounded unsure though

TG: because im unsure of myself

TG: i can be insecure too

TG: im allowed to be

EB: So... you don't know which one you want?

TG: exactly

TG: troll or brother

TG: both is wrong

TG: fuck

EB: Maybe one of them is sending mixed signals so you'll like the other instead! That could be why you're confused?

TG: but dirk said to karkat that i liked him but dirk still kissed me

EB: He said that before or after the kiss?

TG: after

TG: but dirks jelly

TG: dirks fucking jelly when i had a troll curled up with me on a couch

EB: Maybe, he's just trying to give you one option?

TG: think john think

TG: dirk kissed me

TG: twice

TG: then he told karkat that i liked him

TG: scratch that

TG: that i loved him

TG: and he still got jealous afterwards

TG: and the two of them talked about my butt

TG: lets not forget that

EB: But, maybe he's putting himself aside so you and Karkat can...?

EB: You should ask the troll if he said anything like that!

EB: If he stands aside, do you really think his feelings would just go away?

TG: no

TG: youre talking about a strider

TG: what do you think

EB: Jealousy explained! The troll has a chance with what he's given up on pursuing!

TG: i dont get

EB: huh?

TG: you arent in my position you dont get no one get dave poor dave all on his own not even jade helps cause she doesnt get society and morals and shit and oh yes jake is a big fucking help and cant exactly talk to dirk and rose and roxy are too immature and rude with shit like this ugh poor dave me fuck why third person lets just go with second you are now dave strider who fucked up everything go dig a hole and forget you cant reverse gravity to get out bluh......

EB: Dude...

TG: stop

TG: dont you talk

TG: try thinking of making out with jane

TG: how do you feel

EB: Dude! She's like- my sister- oh.

TG: exactly

TG: welcome to my world

EB: If you feel like that about Dirk, why not go for the troll then...? There's no way neither of them aren't going to get their feelings crushed.

TG: y7uhtttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt

TG: you dont know this troll

TG: this troll is tsundere and fucking kawai and all that shit

TG: im just like

TG: how do explain

TG: and then dirk said something like karkat wants my butt and im like wut

EB: Wait, that just proves what I said before!

TG: wut

EB: About how Dirk's pushing himself out of the way!

TG: but dirk still feels

TG: hes gon be sad

TG: fuck grammar

TG: im a wreck

EB: He's doing it himself

TG: but hes hurting himself...

EB: He's made it obvious who he thinks you should choose

EB: He's hurting himself for you, Dave!

TG: hang on a tick let me just go check on them...

EB: ok...?

**Dave carries his phone with him as he heads out of his room, passing down the hallway and peering into the living room. He blinks curiously at the two curled up together on the couch before confusion, taking a photo and quickly hurrying back to his room.**

TG: you think that dirk is trying to let me have karkat right?

EB: uh... where is this going?

TG: take a fucking look

**\-- turtechGodhead sent ectoBiologist file twosleepies.png --**

EB: Oh...

TG: whats going on i dont

EB: Well, didn't you say he was snuggling you too?

TG: last night or two nights ago

TG: in bed

TG: with the two of them

TG: idk

EB: :/

TG: yay im a whore to a troll and my own brother

EB: Dave, not true. You're just trying not to hurt them.

TG: but im gonna have to arent i

EB: One of them.

TG: but i dont want to hurt either of them fuck

EB: Feelings are gonna get broken. You'll have to choose whose,

EB: No one can really help you with that.

TG: ok ok ill just think it over...

EB: OK

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] --


End file.
